Is it normal to have a crush on my step-father?

He and my mom are seperated but I still remember him as being there for me when I needed him. He is such a gentleman and so chivalrous, not like young guys these days. I can't help but fantasize about him

Please don't judge. We can't choose or control our emotions.


Most Helpful Guy

  • It's normal in a sense, to have a crush on him.

    But you have to understand how wrong it would be to try and do anything about this crush.

    If he's such a gentleman and chivalrous, then you can't imagine that he'd want any sort of relationship with you in that way. That would make him a prize a**hole.

    Making any sort of pass at him could seriously damage any relationship you might have with him in the traditional step-father sense of the word.

    It would also utterly ruin your relationship with your mother.

    Just accept the fact that this man is going to be a role model, against which you can measure every guy that you'll ever date. You want someone like him - a chivalrous gentleman. (They do exist, even if you think young guys in your age group are not like him at all).

    Let the crush slide towards genuine admiration and affection. You'll be happier in the long run.


What Guys Said 4

  • I had a similar situation... My dad was dating a mother with a daughter who was more than obviously into me. She was cute, I would have given it a shot but the idea of dating someone who could be thought of as a step-sister kept me away.

    It would be dangerous to pursue anything, but your thoughts are yours to control.

  • I think it makes sense completely, but I also think you have to be careful because if you act on those feelings there could be serious consequences.

  • I don't see anything wrong with it. After all, if he is genuinely a good man and very respectful, why shouldn't you be attracted to him if he has those qualities? He just so happens to be your stepfather. Of course, there could be some jealousy issues on the part of your mother, or he might feel uncomfortable being with you because of her, but if he really liked you and mom didn't throw a fit, I'd say, sure, go for it. Both of you are adults and you seem to really like him!


What Girls Said 3

  • have you talked to him? flirted a little? id say see what his reaction is to that, and go from there. who knows?

  • My opinion is this I'm the Mother I'm at A loss for words I've been through a lot of things but this is by far the worst pain I've ever endured in my life I just want to cry

  • You should tell him and see what happens.