Why would my girlfriend stop me halfway into our makeout session and say "not tonight"?

[Anonymous]

My girlfriend and I went out to dinner and then drinks last night.

We called it a night around 11 and I dropped her to her house after. She told me she really wanted me to come in so I did.

After a couple minutes of watching TV on the couch, we started kissing, something she initated and then it got hot and heavy.

I got on top of her and started feeling her up outside of her shirt. Mean while she started kissing me even harder.

After a couple more minutes, I started taking off her shirt, but she immediately stopped me and told me “not tonight”, and if it was OK if we just cuddle tonight.

I really love her, and really do just like spending time with her so I agreed and we just cuddled for the rest of the night.

I really don’t mind cuddling, but I was really annoyed at her for stopping me last night. I mean if she just wanted to cuddle for the night she should have said so from the beginning right?

Instead she tells me to come in, initiates the kiss, let’s me feel her up, and gets me hot and hard only to stop me midway.

Ladies, can you explain this behavior to me?

Updates

+1 y

-We've been dating for 5 months.

-She's stopped me once before, saying she was tired and not in the mood as well, but she made it clear before we started kissing.

[sexyasianboi26]

Have you ever had sex with her?

I mean maybe you forgot to brush your teeth. If you can turn a girl on in her head first, and if you do this right, a chemical will be released in her brain and she will be oblivious to the other senses. Meaning she won't be able to smell your breath but her touch sense will be magnified by 10x.

If your girlfriend is the shy type, then its normal. Insecurity is an issue some girls will never get over.

[toulouse]

She did not want to have sex& did not want to work you up, even more.

sometimes people just want to kiss, but you git turned on, so she stopped.

at least I could easily see that scenario, with myself.. also its happened, where were kissing-guy initiated it, and escalated it, & guy stops it, right when its getting really intense and at the point things are going further he just stops. it happens to people alot, I think.

[Anonymous]

probably on her period. Or wanted to see if you'd still be OK with just hanging out with her after making out and not getting anywhere further than that. Sometimes when relationships get into the sexual area, women tend to question the guys motives for spending time with them ( even if they themselves do want sex as well) For many women sex is very emotionally based act.

[Asker]

I really am in with love this girl, so I was more than content and didn't hesitate to agree to just cuddle for the night.

I just didn't appreciate how she initiated the act, and then stopped mid way right before we're about to really get into it. If you're going to start something, you should finish it.

[Opinion Owner]

i completely understand the mans side of it. But truthfully, I've done that with my boyfriend before. And it was for the simple fact I wanted to know he was OK with just going back to the basics. Once your relationship becomes a sexual relationship you need to know that's not the only thing your boyfriend is there for sometimes. Plus you want to know when you get married the two of you can just hang out.

[Anonymous]

It's possible to be in the mood for making out but not sex :P

So she "forgot" to tell you ahead of time, is it really a big deal? Are people really obligated to say that? She might have thought making out would get her in the mood but then it didn't. It happens.

[Asker]

Ever heard of blue balls? If not, it hurts and is annoying.

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah, your boner doesn't make someone obligated to have sex with you.

[Asker]

Valid point, but it doesn't give a girl the right to lead her guy own to thinking he's going to have sex, and just stop.

[Opinion Owner]

Everyone has that right... it's the basics of consent. Sure it's a disappointment, and communication could be better, but would you rather she think, "well, I didn't TELL him I wasn't going to have sex with him, so I'd better keep going even though I'm not comfortable with it"?

[Anonymous]

Well, maybe she just was tired and didn't feel like it. Very possible. Or maybe she had an infection she wanted to get rid of, not a big deal to tell you about it, but some women feel strange about it. I don't understand why she would do that either - you initiate it, so be prepared to follow up, etc, and I'm a woman. If I initiate it, I do not stop him. ;) I go for it al the way. Strange. Ask her. Girls don't mind talking about this stuff.

[cherrycustard]

LOL maybe she was on her period... don't worry about it thoughh... sometimes girls don't have as high a sex drive as guys, anyway.

[toulouse]

sometimes people just stop, guys too.

[Anonymous]

urinary infection. Very common on women. They don't like to talk about it.

[Anonymous]

Maybe she was on her period.