Where do I stand? So confused.
Hi - I will try keep this short. Basically I have been friends for the past 6 months with this wonderful guy. A guy I now describe as my best friend. We text each other constantly, like at least 100 texts a day. Shortly after becoming friends we decided that we would hook up, friends with benefits. he didn't want a relationship as he plans on moving away to another country early next year. I broke my ankle and as we live a distance from each other, we didn't really see each other at all. We had not had sex yet either. Out of the blue, he told me he had went on a date with someone else, a date his friend had set up for him. He got on well with her and said he felt like he had to tell me because he felt like he was cheating on me, and said that it was stupid that he felt like that since we werent together. Naturally I was upset, and during a long talk that evening, he told me he self sabotages, and he always effs things up when theyre going well and that he was sad we wouldn't get to do what we said we would do. This was the begining of September. After that, he was quite distant and although we were still talking, things were strained. I was hooking up with an ex, and he started seeing the girl he went on the date with more. I have also decided to move away, and told him this mid October. He asked if we could hang out before I went, this was the first time since it all happened. We met, and just talked in his car for almost 5 hrs. He asked me if I regretted us not hooking up, I didn't reply and he went on to say that he "kind of regretted it". I ignored it, and a few days later asked him in text what he regretted, pretending I didn't understand the question. He said again that he wondered if I regretted us not hooking up like we talked about. I said yes and no, yes cause I liked him a lot, no because he was a great friend and I know had we had sex, we wouldn't have remained friends. He asked to hang out again, before I go, so the following week, we hung out, went shopping and cinema, and spent the evening cuddling and him giving me headrubs, he told me how good it felt having me buried in his neck and told me how cute I was when I was dozy. The following week, we met again (we both travel one hr to meet) where the cuddling got even more intense. We talked about my ex, and he told me I should go on dates. I said I wasn't interested, and he seemed satisfied with that although I could be reading into things. I then asked him how his dates were going. He said he never knew if he should tell me about them or not, and asked me if id prefer not to know. I ignored him and he asked again, I said I didn't want to know and he held me close. we have been texting non stop since, sending text hugs and text head rubs during our text convos (sad I know) He's told me I wasn't on my own that he was here for me. We Haven't kissed, apart from on the cheek (I told him I hate kissing) and we have plans to stay overnight in a hotel hanging out next week. What is going on?
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