How to reverse my ex's anger and hurt

So my ex and I dated for two years. I broke up with him a few months ago, but we agreed to try again after a month apart. Things seemed to really get great again. All our mutual friends kept telling me how happy they were to see him talking about me nonstop again. The guy was head over heels, and... Show More

Most Helpful Guy

  • I hate to say this, but he is going through so much that he is redirecting his anger on you. He might be having some serious problems. I think you need to step back yourself and evaluate what you want in life. A few years back, I was the emotional bombshell your ex is. When you have no control over your emotions and do not understand them, it is difficult to mix them up and take them out on the people that you do not mean to.

    First. He needs to see a health counselor. He is clearly not doing well mentally and could use some help, and unfortunately, you can't do it because he blames you for problems that are not your fault. Next, you might need to find a confidant to start sharing you're feelings with. Break-ups are tough, I have been on both sides. No one wants to get hurt.

    Just relax through the days, keep yourself busy with friends and family, and give him space. Don't call or text, and then a few weeks from now say this.

    "I am sorry and understand things went wrong the last few months, and I blame myself for a lot of it (No explanation needed). I know you are going through a lot and I hope I can be there to help one day. Until then, you know how to reach me."

    Leave it at that, if you go any further he will feel pressured, he is clearly not emotionally stable right now. Being a guy that has been emotionally unstable, it is hard to see the light. It takes months for us to comprehend what is going on, we were not raised to understand emotions, just pack them in till they blow up.

    I know his side all too well, and I have seen yours as well, feel free to ask anything else to me.

    • thank you so much. You just confirmed a million things that have been running through my mind. I really appreciate it.

    • i'd actually really like to talk more with you about what you went through, if you could send me a message some time. Thank you!

    • No problem, headed to the gym now, I'll be back in my office in 2 hours and I will message you, if you are on. (Slow month, I own a real estate brokerage and this is the slowest time)