What are you supposed to say when a girl asks if she is fat?

Question

my girlfriend and I were playing about, I just lovingly grabbed her belly (not really overhang, she isn't obese just a little that pops out) she stopped and asked me "do you think I'm fat?". I told her "yes, but not that bad". she quickly left the room and I'm still trying to get back in contact with her, this was just yesterday...

Are you supposed to lie or tell the truth?

BrighteyedAsh · Accepted Answer

Lol your update reminds me of a conversation with my ex. It was years ago... My breasts are...um...fairly big and it was right after they'd taken a size leap and I usually wore medium. We went in to Aeropostale and I was picking out shirts. He said "Do you think you should maybe try large?" I just stood there half stunned...after which he said "No I mean...you know...your breasts have grown a lot...and..."  and I just stood there not sure whether to be angry or not when he said "No no baby. I love you. Let me make it up to you. We can grab some Burger King on the way home." At which point I bust out laughing "Wow you're really piling it on there huh?" he quickly realized the implication in the statement...and laughed too. "I swear I meant so you wouldn't have to cook! I love you! I'm sorry." "Ouch." there were bystanders nearby who enjoyed the exchange as well. Personally I wasn't offended. The large fit much better in the end so I couldn't really resent him for his suggestion. I never made anything of it but 7 years later...even split up it gets brought up in good humor. (We have a 5 year old so we still have to talk despite not usually caring to so we occasionally try to make friendly convo)

MaskedSanity · Accepted Answer

That question is the ultimate test of girlfriend quality.

If your girlfriend is indeed fat and expects you to lie about it - you run for the hills and you run fast.

Being honest in a relationship is very important from both sides. Many women banter about how their man is not honest, but the second he says she doesn't look stellar, all hell breaks loose.

I certainly wouldn't want to be with a man, who fed me lies, because he thought I'm such a fragile little princess, that I couldn't take a bit of criticism. And in your case it wasn't even that! You answered her direct question and she flipped out.

Red flag, if you ask me.

BrighteyedAsh · Accepted Answer

Same way you'd want a girl to respond when you ask a girl/or quietly wonder about the size of your d***. If the truth is unpleasant in a case like that you don't focusedly SAY "It's small."

if you love a guy. Same with girl fat, breast size, etc.

Disclaimer: Not saying your d*** is necessarily small, I'm saying...you don't point it out if it is.

[Thankfully as long as I stay with my boyfriend I don't have to have an awkward convo or lie about it. The second best part about being with a well endowed guy (; ]

GoodManDave · Accepted Answer

Wow! That was blunt! Now, see, I would consider it MERELY as a joke... but I wouldn't say it unless I knew she could understand I was kidding, and could handle it.

Never ever tell a girl that you are interested in that she's fat... "Does this dress make me look fat?" Even if you think it does, you say... "I don't know if this dress compliments you as much as that other dress I love..."

If you want her to lose weight, you offer some ideas that "sneak around" the idea, but at a different point in another conversation: "Hey, let's go for a jog!" "Let's take a dance class!" "What if we took a cooking class?"

martyfellow · Accepted Answer

Turn it into a joke. Say she's just the right size for___stop, and wait ofr her to complete your sentence.

If you say she's fat, she will usually punch you or worse.

If you say no, she will say your are lying, since she knows perfectly well she's a little plump, right?

So avoid answering, and turn it into a joke!

leslie1980 · Answer

NOOOOO! man you walked right into that one...ok.  If a girl says "Do I look fat?" Say NOOOOO! say " Honey, you look great.  You are exactly what I am looking for in a girl and I am really attracted to you...to me you're a 10! (even if she is a 4)"  If she is on the heavier side say " No, your not fat, your curvy in all the right places...".  Then grab her butt...that will distract her and convince her.  Never say she looks fat, that will just hurt her feelings.  That is like if you asked someone what they think of your new glasses and they say "man...your ugly".  Honestly, that is how girls take it.  When a girl says that ..SHE IS FISHING FOR A COMPLIMENT...give her one and add another for good measure.

indian_empress_91 · Answer

never tell her if she's fat

if she's thin and asks: well be honest and compliment

if she's average size and asks: be honest and say " you are not skinny, and I like your size it;s just right"

if she's chubby " you are not skinny, you have meat on your bones, bones are for dogs " << lol haha

if she is fat: " *hold her* babe, I love you just the way you are, you have fat but you carry it well for me, I know it's not what you wanted to hear cause all women think skinny is the only way to be beautiful but it's not , you are beautiful to me, that why I am with you, I'm not brad pitt either and I'm OK with that, you love me still...I love you k..*kiss on her cheek*"

you can be honest, you don't have to say flat out " yea you are fat" or say dumb things...you don't have to lie either...it's how you say it

Anonymous · Answer

With most girls, you're supposed to deny, deny, deny.

I personally don't agree with doing that, because a girl knows what she looks like (unless she has body dysmorphia), and the only thing denying it does is encourage the idea that her being a bit fat would be TRAGIC, so THANK GOD she's not, right? It gets annoying hearing someone be SO fat-phobic.

So if *I* had a girlfriend and she asked me that, I'd be like, "I love your body, I don't think there's anything wrong with the way you look" and if she pushes me to describe her, say "chubby AND sexy." If she still gets upset, she needs to take some time to realize that, to some guys, those two things aren't mutually exclusive.

3boys4me · Answer

Ummmmm is this your first girlfriend? Are you from the planet moron? I will spell this out for you so you never make this mistake again...NEVER EVER tell a girl she is fat EVER! OK got it? You're lucky she didn't put you into the hospital. Oh and for future reference do not ever "lovingly" grab a part of a womans body that she may be a little sensitive with. Horrible idea.

Anonymous · Answer

Depends on the girl. You should use diplomacy in situations like this one. No girl likes to hear that she's fat,even if she's obese. You should have told her what you told us. '(not really overhang, she isn't obese just a little that pops out)'. Saying 'Yes,you're fat' is a big no.

Do you like her belly?Or does it bother you?

If you like her belly the way it is you should tell her. Not like this though 'I love your big fat belly'.

If you don't then don't tell anything. Don't lie in any case.

And be carefull from now on. My boyfriend once told me that my belly has become big and lovely, as if I was pregnant. You have no f***ing idea how I felt. Imagine your girlfriend touching playfully your d*** and saying ' Oh you lovely little thingy, you're so cute' . Yeap,that's about how we feel.

Anonymous · Answer

When it's a question like that or "do you think she is hot" and other ones like that, always lie. I know that I appreciate the fact that my boyfriend would lie in those situations if I were dumb enough to ask. Girls will tell you to tell the truth but do you really want to deal with the drama that comes with it? Guys generally have even more faults than girls and and we lie to you guys all the time. Do but do you want your girlfriend telling you what they are? Chances are they are things you are not willing or incapable of improving on. I doubt you want to hear them. It will hurt your feelings and make you feel resentment towards her. Think of it that way, what do you want to hear? We have been lying to you guys for hundreds of years to stroke your male ego. I don't understand how guys don't feel we deserve the same.

I am generalizing, some guys get it. Whether they lie to avoid drama or to actually tell her what she wants to hear.

Anonymous · Answer

Sadly, no.

Usually when a girl asks if she's fat, she wants you to say no to reassure her that she is fine in her out of shapeness. Deep down, she probably realizes that she could lose some weight, but she wants you to validate that she's attractive despite her extra weight. Most girls will throw a fit if you give an honest answer. They want you to lie to them. But at the same time, they should be keeping their body right so that you don't have to be put in such an awkward situation.

I honestly don't know what to tell you. I'm not a chubby or bigger girl so it's not really an issue I have to deal with

Account · Answer

You are supposed to tell her that if she is happy with her image, then you are happy too.

If she keeps asking you tell her that you think she should start working out more.

Be honest, just choose the right words. Don't tell her flat out that she is fat. That hurts.

Anonymous · Answer

think of it this way...

is it ever OK to lovingly and honestly tell your Boyfriend his penis is tiny if he asks you what you think of it?

either lie or find a way to avoid answering directly along the lines of "I love every inch of you" "I love you the way you are" "i wouldn't want you any other way"

Anonymous · Answer

You jus got caught in the trap:

Question: "Am I fat?"

Answer: Yes (Honest or jokingly)

Her response: "OMG YOU ARE SO MEAN!"

Answer: No (Honest or jokingly)

Her response: "You're lying, tell me the truth!"

Answer: You are beautiful just the way you are...

Her response: "AWWW! Thanks! Now, Am I fat?

Motivation_Girl · Answer

Girls are very sensitive when it comes to their appearance. Yes we do get upset and leave the room and ignore you but if you said something nice about it like "there's just more of you to love" or say something cute about it. I hope she talks to you soon

kittyhoney · Answer

It is a trap! Actually as a woman I have no idea what kind of answer I want from the guy, But I suppose the answer should be more to the "No you are not fat " side. But not so actually. So being a woman, I don't even know how to answer it. It was hard on you. Good Luck mate!

Anonymous · Answer

I don't know, that's a tough question. I know we women are strange creatures. We ask these questions, complain about guys lying, but then have a strop when they tell the truth and the truth happens to be something we don't want to hear.

Would you want her to be skinnier? I think that's the main thing. She probably thinks you find her unattractive now, or not as attractive as you would if she were skinnier.

sisterray · Answer

Lie. Women are liars and generally need to be lied to.

Anonymous · Answer

I can't believe you said 'yes'. I don't mean to be rude, but how old are you? I thought every adult male knew not to do this. It's generally not a question where somebody wants legitimate criticism, just reassurance that you think they're beautiful and like them the way that they are.

She's honestly never going to forget that you've said this, it's going to come back to haunt you.

Anonymous · Answer

god i hate women like that. Seriously, if there's a possibility you'll get an answer you don't want, don't fucking ask.

I can't believe so many people are saying "never tell a woman she's fat."

well then, don't ask if you're fat if you suspect it.

It's like a guy with a tiny dick asking if he's got a tiny dick. Wtf are you supposed to say? Lie?

booyah · Answer

never call a girl fat XD girls ask "am I fat" because they want you to say no so they can feel better about themselves

LovelySerene · Answer

Any girl who asks if they are fat and can't handle the truth needs a reality check...I'd hate myself if I ever sunk so low as to ask a guy if I was fat or not

Primrose · Answer

i wish girls didn't ask this.  when I ask this I want a truthful answer.  but then again I see their point

CrazyCherryBlossom · Answer

She was probably wanting to be complimented or at least reassured.  Most girls are just asking for a compliment.  When I ask, it's kinda a rare question and I want a REAL true answer.

What are you supposed to say when a girl asks if she is fat?

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