So I have been on this site for a good while now, and I am really fed up with lots of questions on here.
There are lots of good questions here with many perspectives. However: So many people come here asking questions when they have already made their mind up. Others already know the answer and ask anyways!
In the end, when someone answers with a solid, honest answer, people get all butthurt and throw a tantrum, when they came to a public forum looking for answers.
Seriously, what gives? Is there any hope for humanity?
Ok, one of you asked for examples so here you go:
A girl comes and asks for opinions on gun control and then proceeds to shoot down every answer on there and tells them that they are dumb and wrong. She clearly didn't come to learn or get opinions. She just wanted to fight and start problems. Why would she do that?
Or when someone knows that their relationship is going down the drain but still comes here asking what to do and getting mad when people tell them that it's pointless to go on.
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I got an "Offensive Posts" warning tonight and the only thing "offensive" I've done on this site is be honest. Are people here that butthurt over the truth? Am I supposed to sugar coat answers and tell people what they want to hear? When I screwed up as a kid I got my ass kicked and learned a lesson. I didn't have my hand held and get a trophy like the entitled youth of today does.
First of all its human nature for people to do this.. but this usually is a characteristic of people like me which is CONFUSION and COMPULSION and the tendency to validate your own opinion.
If you're going to throw a party and you want to know if you should play beer pong you would not ask your grandma the answer to that question... lol would you? You'd ask a friend... so people ask other people hoping to get the answer they want to hear.. so they get validated and do what they need to do.
Most people on here don't have the courage to do certan things which is okay that's human nature to have some fear or anxiety.. like calling a girl for the first time.. they know they're gonna call the girl but FIRST they need validation that way if it messes up they have people to fall back on and they can say "at least I tried" and they got all the positive validations I think its just a validation process... lol
people want to know that what they're doing is the RIGHT decision.. even though they wanna do and they're going to they just need to know its the right one.. and when someone says its a bad idea they won't listen instead theyll go and talk to someone else and get validation to do what they know they are gonna do and want to do lol
its confusing but like I said.. confusing and compulsive and scared people do this beause it helps them make a move
On the first example I have to agree with you, that's silly and kind of pathetic.
On the second one though I don't think it's so black and white. When people are in relationships and they feel it going down hill there natural instinct is to reject that idea. So they are looking for someone to tell them that it's going to be OK even though deep down they know it isn't.
some people are slow.. Some people are smart.. Some people have an idea of what is going on but are clinging onto hope that someone will tell them that their instincts are wrong because the truth is too devastating to them.. Also some people have already annoyed all of their friends by talking non stop about their S/O so they come here and make stuff up just so they can talk about them (unless they really are that dumb)
For the people who pre-judge to much and aren't open minded:
Honestly sucks to be them... They end up being less intelligent, worldly, have less interesting friends, probably effects work opportunities they could have had, and their life is close minded, most people don't become successful by being close minded and not taking chances.. In the end they will likely be a hypocritical and at times self contradicting person who has nothing better to do than to sit alone in a rocking chair talking to them self of a deaf person... Or a paid nurse who's paid to be around them not by choice..
I've found that most times the reason someone asks a question he/she already knows the answer to is to hear another person's point of view.
The person may want to hear your POV to verify what he/she was already thinking
Possibly the person genuinely really wants to hear your opinion (maybe he/she is not expecting what you are going to say because he/she had it his/her mind that you were definitely going to say this and wanted to verify)
Hearing another person agree with me makes me feel like I am right, even if I'm really wrong.
Seeking for approval.I begin to realize that some users here are not looking for advise.They just wanted to see if there were any other people who have the same thought as them,thus make them feel better.Disagreeing with people opinion and throwing tantrum is a common kindergarten drama for some people here.They come with the hope that everyone must agree with their opinion or at least 'almost agree'
devils advocate. people like to hear counter arguments to what there pretty sure they've already made up their mind over. just to make sure.
just because you want opinions, doesn't mean you have to give up your view. some people like to argue things out, till they are sure. its perfectly normal cognitive function of any human brain. it mitigates making rash judgments or acting on impulse. I think its healthy. keeps your mind flexible. increases brain plasticity.
you only want to answer if the person promises to adopt your view over theirs. I don't see how that's superior to arguing out your own point for yourself.
it means even if someone is 99% sure. they are still willing to hear counter points. I think its more courageous than just deciding you're right.and being dense. which is all the people who don't ask questions, that you're not seeing argue their point. you're seeing people who are willing to question themselves.not all questions come from complete lack of view.
its funny though. when someone really wants advice. people say you'll know qht to do. its your decision. etc etc. but when someone has an idea of what they want to do but wants to hear other perspectives. people get offended if they ultimately stick to their own view. after looking at others.
why get offended because people are interested in a mental debate. just don't expect people to automatically agree with u. enjoy the debate.
Reassurance or because they want to read other opinions to help them figure out what they think of it themselves -- and that usually ends in bickering between who's right/wrong. I find it kinda pointless too, but whatever does it for ya.
Some people only come to GAG for validation. They only come here to hear what they want to hear, and some get frustrated when people disagree with them and tell them the ugly truth. They want everyone to agree with them and back them up.
It's pretty normal human behavior, actually.
And also, GAG is full of trolls. They post questions so they can have a forum to offend people and start fights. Sad, but true.
People have a set opinion and want to see how it matches up to the opinions of others -- polls, discussions, messaging, articles, etc. help them feel more grounded/confident with regard to their opinion and often they see alternate perspectives. If a person asks a question then "trolls" by belittling everyone's responses, the post is generally removed.
As another member stated, you're under no obligation to stay on the blog or read any portion of it.
lol strangely enough your one of the people that your describing...Some people ask questions because they want to validate their decisions, or they just want to hear the opinions of others...This does not necessarily mean that they will take these opinions well...Even if they already know the answers people sometimes ask so that they can get more insight from others...Just remember that even though people came looking for answer to there questions doesn't mean the answers aren't going to hurt them but it's worth the risk to hear what people "truly" think.
People are insecure as a default, having other people's input just gives a sense of security in what they are doing. Even tho thy may already know the answer it still feels good to have other people behind you telling you what's right is right.