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Why would a man not be able to physically have sex?

I have been friends for several years with a guy and recently we have been spending more time together. There has been a lot of flirting and we even made out one night a few months ago. I always got a feeling of 'one foot in, one foot out' with him but didn't think too much of it. Recently I had been thinking of possibly taking our relationship to a more physical level based on the flirting and the chemistry we did have when we made out. When I approached him about it though he got visably upset and I was floored and confused. He shared with me that he is unable to physically be with a woman. I didn't push the issue since he was so upset and I do value his friendship above all else and want him to know he can trust me and talk to me. I am very confused though since the night we made out it was obvious he was attracted to me even though we kept all bottom clothes on. It sounds as if it is more of a medical issue possibly but I was curious if anyone could offer more insight.

What's Your Opinion?

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Most Helpful Opinion

  • 1) Is it possible he doesn't find you sex worthy? 2) Perhaps he finds you sexy but doesn't like your "baggage". 3) Or, he has a tiny unit? Its one of these. My money is on number 2. There is nothing than makes a penis act like a frightened turtle more than getting inside a womans brain. You friendship and sharing has scared him straight. That's why he turned white when you wanted to take it to the next level. We was picturing himself inside your universe. He prefers to talk you off the ledge, not to join you on it. ;-)

What Guys Said 5

  • Age is a factor but there are many others--stress, worry, physical problems like low T, previous prostate issues, exhaustion, etc. Many women believe that most men do not have a problem getting erect. There are millions of men who can't.

  • His pud doesn't work. It may be due to a few things, especially in his age bracket. He can try Viagra.If he really wanted to, a talk with his Dr. may help.

  • If he is in your age bracket, he may be having performance issues for some reason.

  • If he is speaking the truth he has either a medical or a mental erection issue. It is not that uncommon with mental issues among us dudes - we get performance anxiety and it gets worse the hotter we perceive a woman.If he is lying he is simply not that into you and can't bring himself to say it so he pulls the erection card which sounds really weird to me that a man would do.

  • He may have a damaged or missing penis?

What Girls Said 3

  • Your profile says over 45. Some men in that age group start to have performance issues. Nothing kills a mans ego faster then not being able to get it up or to perform.

  • Hmm.. He was upset but didn't elaborate other than to say physically? That to me means either he's impotent (perhaps due to prostate surgery or other reasons that ED meds won't help), he has possibly had surgery that has deformed or removed his penis (yes, penis cancer DOES exist) or even the possibility of an STD such as HIV+ or genital warts that he feels unwilling to pass along. You say you've been friends for several years so you don't really have a LONG history with him, ie you didn't know him since you were kids. Ambiguous genitalia at birth requires the parents to decide the sex of the child after birth. Possibly he's a transgendered female and just doesn't know how to broach the subject. That's about all I can think of that might be causing physical issues. Hopefully he'll open up to you about it as time goes by. It may just take him some time to be willing to share what the issue is.

  • (1) He is a eunuch(2) He has low libido/stamina(3) He's had an unfortunate accident...

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