Do you think girls would be happier to share an alpha male?

Question

Would a girl would be happier to share an alpha male than to have a beta male all to herself? Other species do this. In a less obvious way, humans already do this too. Some guys get so many girls. Most guys get no girls or very few girls, no matter how many girls they approach. Also, I’ve noticed that even not-very-attractive girls often seem angry/offended if a beta male approaches them. Do you think we give beta males false hope by presenting the idea that every guy will get a girl eventually if he just tries hard enough? I’ve approached so many girls of so many different ‘types’, and I’ve had no success.

I think in a few decades outright polygyny will become the norm. Most guys won’t be able to get a girl (they’ll stay celibate, or resort to prostitution, which will probably be legalized in many areas of the West where it isn’t already legal). And most girls will share an alpha male. I think the sexual revolution, the decline of religion (and its taboos), and other factors since the 1960s have made this inevitable.

Personally though, I don’t think this change is bad. I think most girls feel bitter about settling for a beta male. The fact that most girls are willing to go through so much pain to be with an alpha male, if the opportunity arises, shows that it’s really only taboo that prevents widespread outright polygyny. And most guys feel overwhelmed and embittered by the demands of the dating game, to which they’re just not suited. The only thing stopping outright polygyny at the moment is negativity. Few people make a positive case for monoamory. It’s always a negative case against polyamory. And negativity always loses out in the end.

OpenClose · Accepted Answer

Then you probably don't understand a whole lot about human sexuality, or the behavior of chimps and bonobos.

I hear guys idealize and romanticize the idea of "alpha male", as well as the idea that there is a hierarchy of greater and lesser males. That the greater males are the only ones worthy of females, and the lesser males are "less than men", and should thus be ignored or cast from the society.

Such an idea was proposed (though not originally proposed) by Charles Darwin, who not only has a frustrating sex life, but had studied human sexual evolution by observing Chimps, one of our two closest relatives.

In chimp societies, it is high stress and high violence. The beta males are swept under the rug, so in order to survive, they must be more violent and more power-hungry than the alpha and his posse. So each successive new leader leads the society into more violence. Murder and infanticide are the norm. And the females have almost psychologically adapted to the vast amount of rape they experience.

While the alpha is percieved to be above the female, nearly all the other males are below the females in social status. Oh, and you would be a beta. Unless you think you could compete with every quarterback, or could beat The Rock into submission.

They have quick sex that the females hate and desperately try to avoid, and the men are driven insane into doing. Their sexual relations are almost unrecognizable to ours.

Now compare Bonobos, just as related to us as Chimps. There is no Alpha Male. They have an alpha female of sorts, but she's more like the "mother" to the society. She got there because the others respect her, not because she dominated the others. They are not polygynous (one male, many females), but polygamous (many males, many females).

We have been observing them for 40-50 years, and haven't recorded a single case of rape, murder, or infanticide. They are low-stress and very playful. If a male gets violent, females will surround him to calm him down, and would have therapeutic sex so he does not feel abandoned.

They thoroughly enjoy sex, using it to establish a sense of community. They French Kiss, have oral sex, anal sex, hand jobs, and stare into each others' eyes when making love. Homosexual sex is normal, because sex is not about reproduction, but social bonding.

Nearly every aspect of their sexuality is identical to that of humans, with the exception that most human cultures actively CHOOSE monogamy for the sake of stability in modern societies, especially when sex is taboo. In pre-agricultural humanity, polygamy was the norm. Even later, many cultures had large feasts / sex parties to celebrate good crop seasons.

And most importantly, our females WANT sex. It takes a large amount of resources and effort in the middle east to keep their women asexual, including veils, sewing genitalia, and hanging non-virgins. If we were an alpha male species, this wouldn't be necessary.

WillRA7763 · Accepted Answer

I don't see how it would be good. I don't usually care to compare humans to animals (ik shocker for evolutionists out there) but seeing as I have thousands of years of human history and the fact that we are the only known species like ourselves in the entire universe (that we know of) I can't possibly see why you would want to degrade human interaction to an animalistic basis. If such social constructs were better for us as a race then logic tells us that we would have never changed them in the first place right?

udolipixie · Accepted Answer

Do you think girls would be happier to share an alpha male?

Some gals would especially if the alpha male is more attractive, appealing, wealthy, high status, and fun to be around than the beta male.

Do you think we give beta males false hope by presenting the idea that every guy will get a girl eventually if he just tries hard enough?

Yes in my opinion male media of this type would be more suited to displaying a non misogynistic reality where guys are happy and healthy without a gal instead of this keep trying notion I find bs.

"Also, I’ve noticed that even not-very-attractive girls often seem angry/offended if a beta male approaches them."

No different than I've notice that even not-very-attractive guys seek and think they're entitled to attractive gals and seem angry/offended at the notion having to get a gal of looks equal to their own calling it settling. I find that just because people are lacking in looks doesn't mean they don't want or prefer more than they have.

sweetchildomine · Accepted Answer

It seems as if today that women have turned the majority of men into betas. Men think they have to be betas to not be offensive.  I think because there are far less alphas in the world- they are much more desired. I think an alpha man is what a woman is wired to want because we want a strong man to protect us and take care of us and wear the pants. I am intensely attracted to alphas. And it has nothing to do with looks, money etc. The quiet strength attracts me. At the same time I know my worth so I'm not willing to fight a  bunch of women for an alpha. If he doesn't pick me, I check out right away. I won't compete for a man's attention. In the end- if a beta treated me well I would be with a beta but I do think there would always be that discomfort that he's making me go outside of my gender role and wear the pants. I don't like it but I would appreciate that he treats me well so I would stay.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Rule number 1: I don't share.

Rule number 2: I'd rather be single than share an "alpha male."

A used d*** is useless to me. Why do I want a d*** in me that's been in someone else?

I'd be a virgin forever before I share a man.

End of story.

Billlewis · Answer

I am utterly mesmerized by the very presence of a superior alpha male stud -- so much so that I'm practically speechless with an odd combination of awestruck admiration, eager anticipation, sexual arousal, jealousy and of course, fear. I know that he could easily beat me with ease, just for the woman's amusement, and that she revels in my cowed demeanor when he walks into the room.

AndyWes · Answer

Hmm. Women often loathe betas because they grew up reading romance novels, chasing the hot high school alpha, etc, and don't realize by definition, only 20% of men or so are alphas. Their parents didn't teach them the realities of dating...

Really, the solution is simple.

Teach the betas game, help them man up and become womanizers, haha.

Jamesthehuman · Answer

Not really.  Because the girls get all butt devastated  because those Doods always cheat and eventually those girls wake up around thirty and marry someone else. If they would rather share an alpha, they wouldn't care when they found out he cheated. If any of that stuff does happen in the future hopefully I'll be dead by then

Robbey · Answer

Without so much as a shred of exaggeration, I'd rather be celibate for the rest of my life than share a man with someone else.

Vandal · Answer

Some would, I reckon. Humans are a strange hybrid of pair bonding & tournament species from my observation.

05Jueey · Answer

I know this is an old question but I'm interested in this lifestyle. It's more because I think he deserves more. That's just me though

front2back · Answer

Sure, and while we are on the topic of complete bullsh*t, I think that aliens will come down to Earth in the near future and steal all of our oxygen and transform it into gold.

marriedguy1982 · Answer

I've actually seen this in action where 2 guys and 2 girls were drinking and one guy ended up with a threesome and one went to bed alone. So yes, this does actually happen.

Anonymous · Answer

No. I would take the beta. But if you're talking just sex, sure I would take the alpha. I don't mind sharing the alpha guy.

Anonymous · Answer

If I want just sex and someone to provide for my children, I guess so. But if I'm looking for commitment then I want the beta.

Anonymous · Answer

I don't mind sharing an alpha if he's like Channing alpha not, that one jerk in the club type alpha

Anonymous · Answer

I would share an alpha because I don't believe in commitment

simplythebest · Answer

I could never share my man!

Anonymous · Answer

B. I don't get along with alpha males anyway..

Anonymous · Answer

No I would date a beta

Do you think girls would be happier to share an alpha male?

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