Don't be Afraid to be Different

[hospitable_pepperoni]

If you were to step into my biology class and look around, I'd probably stand out pretty quickly. I'd be the one wearing bright clothes with an unusual hairstyle for a female, slumped over in my chair doodling on my arm or something instead of devoting my full attention to the board. If you watched me walk around campus you'd probably hear me practicing an emotional monologue or singing a musical theatre song.

My point is, I'm what a lot of people would call weird or different. I'm confident and do things that could seem unusual to other people. And I've gotten a lot of comments about it. Comments like

"If you wore makeup, you'd actually be really pretty!"

"If you grew your hair long, you'd probably have guys all over you."

"Sorry but I wouldn't be with a girl who's into theatre but not movies."

Of course when my friends are around to hear, they're surprised when I don't immediately get upset or vow to change. And it's true I'm not the type of girl people would usually go for in high school. So why won't I change? It wouldn't be hard to grow my hair out or lie a bit about my interests or tone down my cussing or anything that isn't stereotypically considered attractive in a girl. I am somewhat of a romantic, so I've had people ask before why I'm so comfortable being open with my personality traits that are going to turn a lot of guys off.

My reason is simple: Eventually I'm going to find someone who likes me for who I am. Someone who loves my habits, appearance, and hobbies and won't ask me to change.

Maybe it's true that the girls at my school who grow their hair long, wear makeup, and have more common hobbies attract more guys. And it is true, I've noticed it. And sure I've gotten jealous and wondered if people would like me more if I were more like them.

But ultimately, I don't care. Even if I did attempt to emulate an average high school girl who attracts a fair amount of guys- would I be happy doing so? Maybe I'd get to hang out with a guy I liked- but how happy would I be if I started suppressing a part of myself to do so?

My point is, I love myself and I'm happy with who I am. If I were to find a guy I liked who asked me to change something about myself for him, I wouldn't. Because then, sure, I'd have him- but I'd lose a part of me. And that guy might not even stay around forever, but I'll always be there for myself.

Someday, I'll find someone who loves me for the weird and eccentric person I am. And until then, I'm willing to be patient. Because even if I'm lonely, I've got myself and I'm happy with who I am. I'm having fun expressing who I want to be without feeling suppressed.

So my advice to all of you guys, especially if you're still in high school trying to fit the mold: don't. If you want to try that new hairstyle or pick up a weird hobby, go for it. Maybe you'll ward off some guys or girls- but most of them turn out to be jerks anyway. Eventually, it'll lead you to someone genuine who loves the true you.

Same goes for people whose partners are asking them to make changes just for personal preference. Ask yourself: is it going to make /you yourself/ happier as a person? If not, don't do it.

Don't be afraid to be yourself and don't be afraid to be different.

[UnknownXYZ]

www.court-records.net/.../miles-shrug(e).gif

Yeah, I just be myself and it's a double edge sword.

On one hand, people respect you because you come across as fearless; people don't give you shit because you won't put up with any if it came your way. People tell you that you are a "fresh breath of air" because they are "sick and tired" of being around people who are "fake" and succumb to peer pressure.

On the other hand, people are put off that you sometimes would conform to typical social norms. I think sometimes people seem as too "fearless" and their insecurities come out as a result. Sometimes, people don't want to include me in social situations because I am too different and it can be uncomforting.

All this shows is that I am not perfect- far from it. I have flaws and I a lot of things do get to me. I just don't let any insecurities I have come out in front of people. Not that I have my guard up per se as I am known for being easy-going and relaxed but I don't give people my baggage because why would anyone want anyone's baggage.

I also don't lie and I tell the truth (when it's about myself; I won't insult or talk shit about people).

I won't say I am "different" because there are many people who are like me. It seems people like me are hard to come by.

[CubsterShura]

I kinda have the same issue here. I'm not into the pop culture, I'm very bookish and socially awkward and I'm very talkative and clumsy... not the kind of desirable girl. Talents arrract people but my talents repel people, I'm fluent in Chinese and learn martial arts, nobody admires that. I'm also a huge science freak and I'm very much cultured and patriotic, I also write blogs. But I'm still different from others, and I'm not admired. I never had guys liking me, I never liked guys myself. I'm just the underrated girl who sits in the corner and reads a book. People only call me in exam times, making me feel like God.

I'm so happy I'm blessed with a really nice guy, and we're in a happy relationship. We're both different and we understand each other in a spiritual level. It's so amazing.

Always be yourself like you are. Keep rocking your confidence! :D

[hospitable_pepperoni]

Thank you! :-)

[CubsterShura]

You're welcome sweetheart. :)

[Prof_Don]

well written!

[CubsterShura]

@Prof_Don Thank you!

[lordpokerface]

I recently wrote a myTake on peer pressure, and these are the exact points that prompted me to write it. I remember when I was in high school, and was continually under a scanner by most people I knew. I still am, but I don't care anymore.

Being true to yourself is more important than being "famous" or being considered "normal" by society. With the world population being in the billions, there is no proper way to define "normal", making it a relative scale. However, it's sad to see that nowadays, people are taught to follow a certain set of arbitrary rules to be considered a normally functioning person, rather than expressing themselves and being open-minded about others.

Loved the myTake!

[hospitable_pepperoni]

Thank you!

[mmmhhmm]

girl, i ain't gay, and i already like you, i know a bunch friends who would love them a girl like that, but you gotta get out there, you gotta show em you're not scared, and then some guy will grab some balls and dig into you. but you gotta show em you want it, and most of all... that you can handle it, criticism, dating, not dating, and trust me, you;ll find a few freaks yourself, stay cool.

[starbucksjr69]

I see and know lots of people like you actually. Bright hair, bright clothes, doodling or drawing a lot and never usually like to draw attention to themselves. The only differences are personality sometimes, things they covet obsessed with over time, or hair styles and hair colors. But they usually have unusually hair colors and hairstyles

[ThePetSquirrel]

"Sorry but I wouldn't be with a girl that's into theatre, but not movies."
I'm not a big fan of movies either, they're just three or four stories told repeatedly, and it becomes stale.
Good piece. :)

[C011n]

You can also touch-type can't you? That's a lot of text girl. I am like you; i like singing and dancing in my kitchen and i don't care what others think of me. cool hey? it proves that we are all individuals and this is how i behave, maybe not like others but then we are not sheep in the field. Cool. biology. wow. and i bet you can talk medical terminology in latin like you were born to speak it.

[Brukiwi]

Good for you! Everyone is weird in their own way!

"I'm different yeah 'm different" - 2Chainz

[Midget_Hug]

I hate MyTakes written by average people about being different.

[hospitable_pepperoni]

Technically we're all so different we're all average.

[Midget_Hug]

No. Just no. That's just false all the way around.

[GAGSUCKS333]

midget just comes here to bring negativity and not actual logic. Yeah hospitable, we are all different, sure we have similarities when we pick things up from certain people but you are either emulating someone else or being your self.

[Midget_Hug]

No, that's not it either actually, and both are very stupid ways to see humanity. The basic truth is that there are many norms and averages that humans don't take note of that are used in daily living which allow them to communicate and interact effectively.

Those who fall outside of those norms (those who are genuinely different) are very likely to suffer social isolation and be ostracized. Furthermore almost all of this is not by choice or weak conviction; for instance a disability of any sort, a strong conviction to a very unpopular religion of any sort, bizarre philias or phobias, mental illness and other distinctly different problems which "no one is talking about" when they talk about their little corner of individuality.

[GAGSUCKS333]

its not our fault that you only think of extreme cases of people being themselves which results in them being social outcasts. Its not stupid at all, its common sense. NO one is the same exact person, we all have our individuality otherwise there would be people with the same exact EVERYTHING. everyone has something different than others, and even if you fit in, does not make you 100% the same. you will always have something different than your own peers, thats just the way things are. There are some people out there who are different to an extreme, but you automatically think different=social outcast. you interpret whatever you want about somebody ''being their self'' but that doesn't make it right

[Midget_Hug]

No, instead it is your fault for nitpicking differences such as choosing to wear a certain "style", which of course makes no sense since fashion is in and of itself a function of normal behavior and expression. Human individuality today is drilled down that when people suggest that everything would be the same they don't realize how absolutely absurd that sounds; if you take two droplets of water to the atomic level they are exactly the same but if you peer even closer I am certain you can find that there are different in the sense that you will find that the protons aren't in exactly the same place therefore the two droplets aren't really the same!

What you consider "extreme" is in fact simply the basis for human abnormality. The entire reason it's classified that way is because it doesn't fit within a distinct set of norms that just about 99% of humans have so now the modern man derives his "distinction" through wanton self-righteousness.

[Midget_Hug]

But what's worse is that humans run contradictory campaigns. The entire basis of human rights is that humans aren't very different at all. The entire basis of anti-discrimination is exactly the same with race being less than 1% of a genetic pull in the lottery. So the obvious differences like skin color are not okay to act upon yet somehow we play into this individual personality piece a lot trying to viably state that everyone has something to offer (lies) and are unique and should be handled as such (entire basis of procedural management states that this isn't true at all; you couldn't treat anyone with any system if everyone actually was different) but totally flip 180 when someone says that "women and men are fundamentally different at the core" because that's sexist! In essence all that's "individual" about a person is their choices given their circumstances and by no means is that an individual trait to any given human.

[GAGSUCKS333]

''nitpicking differences such as choosing to wear a certain "style",''

dude, you are self projecting. The only person who is nit picking here is you. I didn't exclusively address fashion, but you are making it seem as if that was my point. honestly, I dont even know what your argument is about, its just random crap bunched together with no logic. drop the fashion crap, because I never made that an argument. People have different personalities, this is why some people click easier with others and yes, there is far more than one social group that you can fit into. Do you think in highschool a jock would fit in with the nerds? or would the nerds have much in common with the cheerleader team? yes, we have similarities, and our emotions pretty much function the same way, I never denied that, what I did say is no one is 100% the same and no one will ever be 100% ''normal'' either way, Im done with this as you are running in circles

[Midget_Hug]

"honestly, I dont even know what your argument is about, its just random crap bunched together with no logic."

Some things a tad beyond you.

[Anonymous]

I am very hairy, does that makes me different yet appealing?

[cupidkisses]

yeah different doesn't mean bad

[Patriots512]

I'm different.