Why does it annoy me so much when my boyfriend's ex-gf likes his FB statuses?

[Anonymous]

Says it all in the question

[Sashajkim]

Okay Whatever the previous guy said, No you are not insecure about your relationship... Don't worry i also went through it, Been there, Done that.. i even still get irritated... but never do i keep him from doing what he wants..
all i do is tell him i hate it or it annoys me or i dont like it. Tell him how you feel about it, my guy saw it really annoyed me. so he went and deleted his exes off Facebook and in return for that i did the same so that he can see im serious.

So sit him down and explain how you feel about him and that u dont reallt like it that she still does that, so could he maybe even ask her to stop. you would really appreciate it.

xx good luck message me if u sorted it out :)

[Asker]

I have made it known that I know his ex likes his statuses and when I ask 'do you know why she keeps liking your posts?' Its always that he doesn't know.
But I've never exactly said I didn't like the fact she does. I'm at work at the moment so I've texted him saying we need to talk.

I don't have ANY of my ex's on Facebook because I hate the whole random messages of 'i miss you' or 'i still love you'

[Sashajkim]

exactly what @Paris13 says. gooo CRAZY ON FB, piss his ex off post on his wall every day how happy u are that his YOURS photos tagge and post 100ds she will soon enough get the picture to back off his yours

[Asker]

I'm not going to do that, I don't post gooey lovey dovey statuses on Facebook. I don't like seeing them and I don't like posting them.

[Sashajkim]

Well Then doll, enjoy his ex liking everything. if you don't show her his yours she won't stop...

[Asker]

Not unless he deletes her.
If he knows that I find it a problem, he won't ask anymore questions and just delete her (if necessary, block her). He knows if he told me something was bothering him, I'd sort it.

[Sashajkim]

Tell him then to block her xx. i know how the feeling feels so want you to get to the bottom of it and deal with it. so you dont have to feel that way anymore.. good luck

[Asker]

I think what annoys me most is the fact that she has a boyfriend herself... Call it paranoia, but I think she still has deep feelings towards my boyfriend.
To say she'll make any excuse to talk to him and I can't help but feel she makes all these lovey dovey statuses about her own boyfriend to make mine jealous.
He could still have her on Facebook to show the posts don't bother him at all because... Well they don't.

[Sashajkim]

She probably does have some kind of plan up her sleeve, and that is the most annoying part as you say she has a boyfriend... Can you believe it. does her own not keep her happy that she has to go get attention from another guy who is clearly happy where he is. or he would have been by her. Ag she must grow up x

[Asker]

Well she was abusive towards him when they were together and I used to be in an abusive relationship too.
99% of the time the abuser wants to keep in contact with their victim because they mark them as their 'possession'. She obviously still feels like my boyfriend belongs to her.
I can't say for certain this is what she is thinking because I'm not her.

I have my reasons for him not wanting to talk to her apart from being a 'jealous' girlfriend, I stated in a comment that it doesn't bother me who he talks to. He's talked to other ex's and I never had a problem with it, it's just this one.

[Paris13]

It's normal and natural when the Ghost from the past rattles your own chains from the closet within. And in Knowing being it's Fb, that you and him are a twosome, she may be doing it Purposely just to Get your Goat.
Don't let it bother you. If he isn't doing any Interacting On or Off the Book, then leave it alone and she will eventually get bored of this trivia turf that she May still think she has dibs on.
Start Posting and Plastering all over His wall Pix of the both of you. Tit for tat and let it go with That...
Good luck. xx

[Paris13]

I just saw what Anonymous wrote and it hit me that she would have to be part of his Fb list of friends to post... Yes, delete her, she should be deleted... No reason to have her on there unless he doesn't feel it necessary to go to EX-Tremes... xx

[Creole_Flavor]

Could be a number of reasons maybe insecurity, jealousy, you feel like they should not be friends on fb, you feel like they only like his status to make you mad or be messy because they know you will see it, they want his attention etc.

[Ladrason]

You are probably feeling insecure in your relationship because for some reason only you know. I suggest you talk with you boyfriend about it and make him understand what you think about it. Just try not to become the kind of girl who tries to keep her guy all for himself, not leting him be social with anyone else. doing that would proabably only lead to him leaving you

[Asker]

I would never do that!
My boyfriend can talk to whoever he wants and it doesn't bother me that he's got her on Facebook and I know that he never replies to her texts (his choice not mine) but it's the fact that she likes every post he makes that doesn't have anything to do with me that bothers me.

[Ladrason]

In that case she is probably still interested in him and there really is nothing you can do about that except taking it up with her. I guess you could just message her on Facebook ask her to stop or just come out with that she still likes him.

on the otherhand you could just enjoy that she is still interested in him and he's "yours" =P

[Asker]

Would make sense but she has a boyfriend but I always get the feeling she still has deep feelings for mine.

I know he would never go back to her and as a friend, I wouldn't let him. We were just friends when him and her were together and she was abusive towards him (stopped him from seeing his friends, made everything about her, everything was his fault, called him a crappy boyfriend if he didn't come and see her after his 12hr shifts)

I guess it's a mix of insecurity of her manipulating him and not wanting him to go back to he

[Anonymous]

Because she should be deleted. Like why stay in contact with the ex? These things don't usually work out well.

[Sashajkim]

Exactly i 100% agree with you!

[Scorpio909]

Keyword is the comment is usually. Personally I wouldn't be friend with an ex, but other people would and that's their choice. It's not like an ex liking Facebook statuses will destroy a relationship.

[Opinion Owner]

Her liking the status alone won't, unless it starts arguments because he's not considering his actual girls feelings more than his ex.
But no, most people don't just stay friends with ex's for no reason, most people usually delete each other and delete numbers or whatever. At the end of the day, it's quite likely that he wouldn't be happy with her ex's all over her Facebook, so why does he do it?
When you move on to a new partner, your ex should be gone, they shouldn't still be on your friends list and you guys be in contact, especially if your partner doesn't like it (which I doubt any partner would actually be entirely ok with) your ex is meant to be the past, so I don't know why this guy wants to keep his ex in contact.

[Scorpio909]

Okay you stated what MOST people would do and feel after a breakup. Fact of the matter is not everyone is going to feel that way. There's is nothing wrong with being friends with and ex as long is not doing anything to are a new relationship. I don't see why some people in relationships get worked up by small this like their partner being friends with an ex. As long as it's just friendly chatting what harm will it cause.

[Opinion Owner]

Well, when your girl becomes friends with her ex, just don't be surprised when she goes to that familiar friendly shoulder to cry on when you guys are going through a tough patch in your relationship. Because that's the only thing I've ever seen ex's be useful for.
I know 100% my man wouldn't feel comfortable with me being friendly with my ex's, and I completely understand why. It's not even a thing anybody needs to ask you to do when you've moved on, you just do it.

[Scorpio909]

See that doesn't bother me a bit. Because honestly it don't crossed any boundaries in a relationship. And no should have to do it unless they want to or it's hurting a current relationship.

[Opinion Owner]

Well

[Opinion Owner]

Really, I love guys like you. Girls can do anything, and nothing is a boundary till she actually fucks a dude, and even then, it's so easy to twist his head and make him believe it never happened.
It's, not entirely bad, because we need different types of people in the world to get along, but guys like you are great for many reasons, so so easy. Can literally have any guys I like around, even ones who reeeally like me and stuff, and the dude be like oh that's OK, lmao

[Scorpio909]

Yeah I'm not that type. I do have boundaries set, they're just not of minor things like be friends with and ex. And as for fucking another there's not way you can twist me I'll dump any girls ass in a heartbeat if I was to find out because I don't do second chances.

[Opinion Owner]

Well, if you're ok with all the stuff about her running to an ex for that familiar shoulder to cry on, I obviously think more like a guy than you do. Reason most guys wouldn't like that, it's because they know what the ex will do, I'm a girl and even I know what he will do. He'll be all oh he's no good what a horrible guy here come get a hug etc... And everybody in the world knows exactly what he'll be trying to do.
Her having an ex as friend on Facebook obviously isn't major, but it's a small thing that just shouldn't really happen. But if you really really wouldn't have a problem with your girl running to her ex to bitch about you and the relationship problems, you're just begging to get cheated on. I've known sooo many guys like you, and they get all confused when shit like that happens, it's not confusing.

[Scorpio909]

Here's my thing. If a girl decided to cheat on me with an ex because something in our relationship isn't going right then it shows me she isn't worth my time and her ex can have her at that point because I'll be done with her.

[Anonymous]

Because you're insecure, and you think that something which is less than a compliment is somehow a threat to your relationship.

[Asker]

Okay then

[MaskedSanity]

Because you care about insignificant things and like to stir up drama.

[Asker]

Not at all.
If I wanted to cause unnecessary drama, I would have messaged her and tell her to stop bothering my boyfriend.
I would have thought not saying a word and keeping it to myself was the exact opposite of stirring things up. I would think this is VERY significant.

[MaskedSanity]

Neither you nor your boyfriend can control what that girl does. The fact that you're worried about her means you don't really trust your boyfriend. The relationship is very much in trouble, if an ex liking his statuses worries you so much.

My boyfriend has 2 STALKERS, for god's sake. But that doesn't make me question his faithfulness one second. More like, these girls' sanity and self respect.

[Asker]

In what part of this question does it show that I questioned my boyfriends loyalty to our relationship?
It's not him that I don't trust, it's her.

Our relationship is in a great place, no question about it.

[MaskedSanity]

You realize that makes no sense, right?

Why would you need to trust his ex? Whatever she chooses to do that involves your boyfriend worries you, because you fear she may do something inappropriate in the future and the fear at the back of your head is that he just might reciprocate and put your relationship in jeopardy.

If you trusted your boyfriend, something as INSIGNIFICANT as a Facebook like would DEFINITELY not bother you. Maybe if she was sending nudes to him via PM on facebook, that would be more of a concern.

You are overreacting.

[LastGirlScout]

Because you're insecure and see her as a threat.

[MaskedSanity]

Guuuurl, what you talkin' 'bout? She is obviously super secure in her relationship and trusts her boyfriend very much. Ain't nothing gon stand in their way.

Except Facebook. Facebook likes are srs bsns.

[LastGirlScout]

@MaskedSanity sorry, silly me, of course it's the OTHER women who are causing the issue... Not the drama queen stalking her bf on fb :) :)

[Asker]

It's not really funny or clever. Seriously both of you grow up.

[LastGirlScout]

QA it is a bit funny... But seriously, I stand by my original statement... And the second one too actually!