Why do some girls just want to be friends, after leading the guy on?

Okay, this female started to lead me on, even to the point where friends started to take notice. When I asking her where everything was leading up to, she said just friendship, pardon my french, but what the hell?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • To be cliche, "she's just not into you." If a girl wants to be friends, it's because she doesn't see a romantic connection happening. I'm sure her intent wasn't to 'lead you on', she probably genuinely found you attractive and was open to the possibility of having something with you. But after going on a date or a few, she determined that you two didn't click in that certain way, which is ok. There are 5 billion people on the planet and plenty of options. Just because you felt a certain way didn't mean she felt the same thing. People are entitled to change their minds and do after dating, men and women alike as they have different criteria. That she wanted to be friends at least suggests that she does care about you and want you in her life in some way as opposed to not speaking with you again, so it's not a total rejection. It just means she's not romantically interested anymore.

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What Girls Said 14

  • I think, honestly, some women just enjoy the attention. Knowing a guy likes you like that can be invigorating at times. Sorry if we give the wrong vibe from time to time, though :(

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  • I was in the wedding of a girl who I really didn't like all that much just to spare her feelings. I shelled out close to 300 bucks to "be a nice person."

    Sometimes stuff like this isn't about a girl being scheming, its genuinely about trying to be kind and caring even when we don't like a person the way the like us. If she likes you as a human, she might think she can be friendly and perhaps one day even set you up with some other nice girl she knows.

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  • Hahahaha, "this female". Nice. We change our minds too quickly. You gotta make sure this girl's hooked on for a real thing and not a quickie.

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  • like faberfan said, she probably thought you two would better off be friends.

    sometimes you find a person appealing at first glance,

    then you start to get to know the real them

    and realize something that makes you think whether they will be friends or more or nothing at all.

    you can't say this hasn't happen to you at some point in life.

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  • I hate girl's like this I have a friend that's got 6 men going on and each one of them think that she loves them, well I think it's disgusting behavior not just for woman but I've known blokes to do this as well, there is only one guy I will ever lead on at any given time but only in a suttle way of course don't want him thinking I'm desperate for his attention you know ha ha. But I wouldn't do it if I had no attention of following through with my actions.

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What Guys Said 8

  • Attention I think.

    I had a girl resting her head on my shoulder. She must have done it about 4 times in one night. Then she says a few hours later, (because she "knows" I hate it when people flirt to be mean or flirt when there's no interest) "I haven't flirted with you in a couple of months!"

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  • A little word of advice: If you're interested in dating a girl, it's a bad idea to start off in the "friend zone" because chances are, that's right where you'll stay. I'm sure you've heard the old saying, "If you want a friend, be a friend." It's true, you will be a friend. Just a friend. If you want to date someone however, you should let her know that right up front. Worst case scenario, she rejects your advances...but at least you won't have wasted an untold amount of time and effort chasing something you'll likely just have to watch some other guy snag up, because he had the foresight to just ask her out.

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  • Maybe she liked you at one point, but realized you'd make better friends, so she tries to spring it on you.

    It happens to all of us, females included. Your best bet is probably to reject the friendship, unless of course you are optimistic, then you could accept it and just hope something happens some day.

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  • Faberfan said it best - unless you're also interested in her on a friendship level, I'd think it was best to move on.

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  • Some girls are like this. It's a sad thing, when any guy or girl does this. But if she's not pursuing anything romantically with you, I'd suggest you just move on. You can keep her as a friend if you want, but she's really not worth holding onto for future romantic interest.

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