Why do hot girls act like they don't "notice" guys, even attractive guys?

[Mr_is_fine]

Why do hot women act as if they don't ever "notice" a guy in her proximity?

A good example is a hot women and a guy will be walking in a narrow hallway, towards each other in opposite directions, and they will be the only ones in the hallway, and the hot woman will walk past the guy without even noticing him, no eye contact what so ever, as if he's invisible. But of course the man will notice her, not just because she's hot, but because she is a moving person moving towards him, which he is alerted to. How the hell are you not gonna at least visually recognize that there is something moving towards you in a narrow hallway? I've experienced this a million times. But only hot women behave like this.

I never see average or ugly women behave like this. What is up with hot women acting like this? Do hot women have some kind of "I'm too hot to even look at you" reputation to uphold? This kind of behavior has to be intentional and consciously controlled.

Updates

+1 y

It's like the woman is walking past the guy with her eyes glued on the horizon chanting in her head over and over "don't look at him, don't look at him...", fiercely trying to fight the natural temptation to glance at someone moving towards her.

[v0nDutch]

ur right, it's intentional & consciously controlled... but not because we have a "i'm too hot to even look at you" complex.. at least not most of us.. and that's the honest truth

do you wanna know why we do it? because we're insecure.. at least I'm aware enough of my psychology to know why I do some of the things I do

u have do idea how it feels like to be an attractive girl... guys grow up and know that girls are interested in them for every reason... looks, personality, humor, money, intelligence... but growing up as a girl.. with everything you see and hear in the media.. and knowing that guys don't exactly jerk off to the idea of a smart, sweet, nice, successful girl.. but some skinny b*tch with big t*ts.. doesn't exactly do wonders for ur self esteem.. every time you see an other hot girl.. you feel like she's more pretty than u.. when a guy doesn't notice you or pay attention to u.. it hurts.. it's rough..

to be totally honest.. hotter girls are way more insecure than average or ugly girls.. because hot girls have to compete b/w other hot girls.. average/ugly girls have sort of just accepted what they are and deal with it..

just because I don't look at a guy doesn't mean I don't notice him.. or don't notice him noticing me

like if I'm on a bus or train.. I'm 100% aware of every single guy looking at me.. it's like I can feel their eyes touch my body.. like I can feel them thinking about me.. I'm just aware of them w/o needing to look at them

why don't I look at them?

b/c I don't want to acknowledge them.. it's all about control.. I want to feel like I'm the one in control.. that I'm in the position of more power.. that he's looking at me.. that he's thinking of me.. that he's paying attention to me.. and that I'm not doing any of those things to him..

that way.. if he approaches me.. I'm in control.. I can set the pace and slow him down.. or completely brush him off.. since I'm not going to do anything.. if he wants to get my attention.. he'll have to come talk to me.. which by the act's very nature is him trying to get my attention.. him seeing my acceptance.. which puts me in a position of power.. that position makes me feel save.. I'm in control.. I can't be rejected.. I can only do the rejecting.. and it makes me feel good.. seeing him work to get my attention..

i know it sounds b*tchy.. but I'd rather give you an honest answer than a pg-13 one

and again.. the reason we mostly do it is because we're insecure and aren't comfortable with ourselves.. I know that as I got past my insecurities and started to become more confident and happy with myself.. I did these things less and less until I completely stopped..

sometimes.. maybe the girl you think is this super-hot goddess actually feels more intimidated and nervous around you than you do around her.. hot girls are still girls you know.. beyond that.. they're also people.. just like u.. just because we don't show you how nervous or like jelly we feel inside.. doesn't mean we don't feel that way on the inside

[Little-Hippie]

Good Question. Good Answer.

[Mr_is_fine]

Alright, you give 2 reasons why hotties do this: 1. for control 2. insecurity. I guess I can understand wanting to put yourself in control. But I don't get how being insecure and uncomfortable withyourself would make you behave like this. If hot women "know" all men stare them down, how could they be unsure about themselves; this makes no sense. if you know all men want you, then you are sure of yourself, you KNOW you are a goddes. Knowing you are a goddess implies you are sure/comfortable. how?

[v0nDutch]

U don't understand what it means to be insecure then.. the only thing I know is that he wants sex with s/o hot and I can offer him what he wants.. but beyond sex.. what else can I offer him? guys don't have that insecurity.. they know that girls want more than just sex.. and they feel confident and secure in being able to offer it.. so they're honest with their interest

so to balance things.. I have to not show the guy that I'm interested in him.. until I know he's interested in me.. get it?

[Mr_is_fine]

No I don't get it. so women are insecure because they know guys want sex and they know they can offer it. But guys are not insecure becuase they know women want more than sex and know they can offer more than sex. I'm not sure I understand what you are saying...So you don't show interest to the guy untill you know he's interested in you for you and not just sex?

[v0nDutch]

There is only one girl in this world that knows she is hotter than any other girl, and she's on top of the bell curve. Unless you know you're that girl, chances are, there's someone hotter than you. On top of that, the older you get, the further down that bell curve you fall. So all girls know is they can have a guy to have sex with her. Big whoop. Other than that, what else do we have to offer a guy? What if hotter sex walks by, then what happens to me? See what I mean?

[v0nDutch]

Most guys know that girls are interested in them for more than sex. they know girls want someone cute, but also someone that's financially stable, someone that makes them feel safe, smart, funny, fun, sweet and caring, and a million other things. when a guy knows he has all those things, the chances of someone better than him coming along is a LOT smaller. so he feels a lot more secure with himself and everything he has to offer to an other person.

[v0nDutch]

So like, unless the girl has other stuff to offer the guy, she feels that he has all these things to back up his value, but she only has sex to back up hers.. so in order to try and make what little she has to offer him, she'll act disinterested in what he has to offer her (playing-hard-to-get) and make what she has less available, rare or uncommon, to try and add some value to it (not giving it up that easy) so there can be some balance b/w the two of them

[v0nDutch]

But the only girls who would do that are hos.. a girl who's smart, successful, rich, and an amazing person on the inside doesn't need to do any of that.. if she does, it's not her fault.. it's the fault of the men in her life who only pay attention to her looks.. and make her feel that the only thing of value she has to offer is sex.. this is why girls hate it when guys just look at them as sex objects.. because we have more than that to offer.. get it now?

[Mr_is_fine]

Thanx for the detailed response. You do a good job articulating this part of female psychology, haven't seen any women do that well here. What you say makes sense now. I can see why a woman would feel insecure if it's true that men only want sex from women and women want sex and more.

[Mr_is_fine]

You have stated what the man's goal is: to have sex with the hot woman. And you imply that this is the only thing he wants. But what is the woman's goal? I mean, once she finds the cute, funny, smart guy, what is she trying to do with him? Is she simply just trying to stay in a relationship for as long as possible and she is using sex as a way to keep the relationship going? what is the woman's goal if not sex?

[Mr_is_fine]

You say a woman will try to compensate by increasing their value by acting disinterested. Now this is the part I don't understand. The assumption you start with is that men just want a hot girl to have sex. Now, I don't see how with-holding sex and making it harder to get will increase your value. If all I want is sex, and one woman makes it easier for me and onther makes it hard, which women do you think I will go with? the easier one. So playing hard to get seems counter productive. why do it?

[Tristan-W]

uh i get it now im a pretty muscular guy tbh i weigh 240 with might believe it or not.
so one of my old class mates were blushing when she seen me but when i acted like i did not notice her she must have felt like crap then. because when we made eye contact she kept looking back until now good advice if it is advice. awesome

[Tristan-W]

when you think about when a girl does i think well ok she either insecure or stuck up and i ok no matter what i think i say fuck it

[taybgarnett]

First, I want to point out that men and ugly women sometimes do it too.. It's a human thing not just hot women. You only notice the hot woman because you want her to look at you. You stated that it seems as if she does it on purpose. I know I feel more comfortable not making eye contact. As I've matured I've really had to make a conscious effort to make eye contact with others, especially attractive men! Attractive people still get wobbly if another attractive person attempts to make a connection. Funny, I find it easier to make eye contact with unattractive men then gracefully take his complement and move on. But what if I do make eye contact with the Superman cutie and when I do he realizes.. My smile really wasn't all that mesmerising and my eyes didn't sparkle quite as bright as he thought. Then im out there hanging all vulnerable.. No thank you! Lol! And heaven forbid I attempt eye contact and its not reciprocated!! Like I said with time and maturity I've become more comfortable with eye contact but it still takes a daily pep talk and sometimes Im just having a terrible day and am feeling more introverted than normal.

[Anonymous]

HM, I dont intentionally not look at a hot male figure walk by or any male in general. I glance at them and I move on with my life. I cannot say that I'm insecure, I'm fucking confident, oh yeah! I just don't care. I can get ignored by men and yeah that hurts like a fucker 'cause I think that I'm not hot enough or something, but then I'm like "oh... I like them. Cause that's exactly what I do." I also go to high school and sometimes ignoring awkward- OH, there's another thing, if I do decide to hold eye contact if I'm like talking to someone and I feel like I should roam my surroundings while listening to the person, I do make eye contact with men and THEY DONT LOOK AWAY. I FEEL WEIRDED OUT, LIKE WHY ARE YOU STARING AT ME AND THEY OBVIOUSLY WIN 'CAUSE I have issues with looking at someone for a long time. It's like their eyes are consuming my soul, ya know. Anyways, conclusion is that not all women avoid eye contact because they think they're "too hot" they can either do it because it's just what comes naturally to them or they just don't want stare downs, capisheo. Hoped that helped 😁

[jusabarasida]

I think women do this to get attention or recognition so they can brag later about "oh he approached be first".. OR the woman is just really busy and has something on her mind..

If she is doing it on purpose, I think its wrong.. I mean.. why are we so afraid of human interaction?.. Its like people who don't even talk to their neighbors when they see other outside the house.. what's such a big deal?.. I don't get it man.. Hot girls don't do the approaching because they over think that sh*t too much.. they always want to be approached because they think they deserve it..

But again.. its not true for all women or all hot women.. but still.. its wrong! haha

[GirlyGirl11]

I do this, and I am not insecure, and it's not a power play.

I am a person, and I believe that I should be allowed to go about my business and my life without having to deal with men who act inappropriately.

If I smile or make eye contact, the guy will start trying to run his game on me. Lots of guys are way too old and should know that they have no shot, but they try to invite me on dates or ask for my number, and they have a come back for any reason why you tell them no.

Some guys keep hasseling you after you tell them that you have a boyfriend. Some of these guys even already have a girlfriend, which I've found out later.

Too bad for the girl if she is on her way to work, because now the guy knows where he can show up work it further.

Then there's those ridiculous pick up artists, who actually believe that they can talk a girl into immediate sex, that day! Men are insane!

And so much of it is totally user motivated! Most of these guys are not looking to have a long term relationship or get married, they are looking to use the girl for casual sex!

Many girls like sex, but they want it from a long term relationship! Not from a guy telling them a bunch of lies and pick up strategy! And not from a guy trying to just practice on her!

So I'm a person and I want to complete my errands and things that I had planned. I don't owe guys a chance to hit on me. I'm a person first, and a girl second!

I will smile at, and talk to, guys that are at their job, because they are doing their job and should know better than to say anything inappropriate.

[londongirl357]

Because they get harrassed, sleazed on and disrespected by guys A LOT. And so often when you see someone checking you out it isn't complimentary, but more disgusting and it makes you feel self-concious and literally just like an object. Sure, it can be nice and a compliment, but so often guys do it in the most degrading way, I think we just get sick of it. Even if the guy she's walking past isn't doing that, it's probably insecurity and awkwardness, she gets guys giving her 'the eye' enough, so really doesn't want it anymore. Basically, insecurity/awkwardness and sometimes you just get sick of being noticed by guys (sounds weird, I know).

[newprecedent]

So I'm completely guilty of doing this. Over the years I have just become accustomed to the fact that people do periodically look at me. After a while you become indifferent towards people passing by, even 'immune' say, to the attention. I know it may seem cold, but strangers are still strangers even if they notice me. That's why I don't often give them recognition or acknowledgment, they are pretty much invisible to me. Nonetheless if I am in a really good mood I will sparingly smile or grin at some guys (assuming it is safe of course), but heck don't get mad just because we don't simper at every person who walks by us. If we did that all the time we would receive an unwanted response.

[shygirl16]

Ok, I know this is a really old question, but I just found it and would like to offer my opinion.

I know I'm very attractive, not bragging, just a statement, I see it in the mirror and in the eyes of all the guys that stare at me. I also do this. If I'm walking through Walmart I will never look at guys as they walk past me. Nearly every guy stares at me and it is extremely awkward to have eye-contact with that many guys. Its not because we are stuck up, but because we would like to avoid the awkward eye-contact that comes when we look at guys as they pass by.

[Anonymous]

Average or ugly women don't have to deal with people constantly harassing/catcalling/disrespecting/bothering them because of their looks. Once you build up a tolerance for it you don't get all giddy like "OMG a guy is actually paying attention to me!11" because it happens all the time. When you even make eye contact with a guy, 9 times out of 10 he will say something to you if he finds you attractive. So if you don't want to be bothered the simplest way is to not make eye contact with him at all. Why do guys act like it offends them? Women aren't obligated to look at you just because you find her attractive.

[Mac7777]

I'm actually a nice guy. Athletic and told I'm "hot" by all my friends, both guys and girls. Every time I see an attractive woman I look at her in hopes of eye contact and she either looks at me then looks away quickly (like she just burned her eyes from gazing upon my hideous face) or noticeably tries to avoid making eye contact with me at all. I get offended by this. More hurt and insecure than anything to be honest but it does seem like it's impossible to chat up an attractive woman if they're always acting like they want to be left alone. Very frustrating. I'm quite intelligent anthropologically speaking but I'm no mind reader. And to act what you don't mean seems very confused and off putting. Maybe I should resort to reading Nietzsche to figure women out. I'm not just about sex either, I'd like a companion, friend, partner. Not a "pickup artist" either apparently but I do say what I mean.

[grnpari]

I'm not trying to be rude, but when you're used to different guys in one day showing interest...well, honestly I don't want to look at them because I don't want to lead them on. It's due to inconveniency & embarassment because I don't want to have to go through the process of turning them down, or hurting their feelings in other words. I don't look stuck up though smh ? hmm

[Mr_is_fine]

A hot girl making eye contact with a guy walking passed her will rarely trigger an encounter where he will chat her up and ask her out. so no, this is not the reason.

what makes sense is that hot women think they have to project this image of being a "stuck up bitch"; theyre not supposed to acknowledge men walking past them, they have to be aloof. Its all about trying to project this image of being unobtainable and not easily impressed. trying to be "Above" everyone else. oh the shallowness...