I work at a bank, and she works 2 blocks from me on the same street at a fast food joint. She is 24 and thinks I’m 25, but in actuality I’m slightly younger.
The very first time I saw this girl I asked her out, she blew me off in a polite way, giving me a very buyable excuses. ( she is a foreign student, who works full time and takes care of her younger sisters)
A few weeks later, I still pursue her at her work place. Now I keep getting signs from her, like staring at me, or when I look into her eyes, she looks straight flat to the ground. She flirts with me by teasing me once in a while, but very subtly. Her friend at work, giggles at everything I say. She called us both crazy at some point. I establish that she is SHY of me.
So then one day I buy her a book on a topic she is interested in, and right a small note, saying I am fond of her, and would like to get to know her better. She responds by saying she loved the book. (In that book I wrote something in her language, which she tells me she didn’t understand, so she makes me say it) I ask her that she should teach me her language, she thinks it’s a great idea. So I say fine teach me now. She just smiles and looks to the floor. Another day I go to her with a paper and pen, and right something in English telling her to translate, and she does. Then I write my e-mail and phone on a paper, and hand it to her, and am about to leave, when she says she doesn’t understand. When I say really? What don’t you understand? She then says no she does understand now.
I actually didn’t expect her to call because of her shyness, but I gave that info to her anyway thinking that she just might, or just to tease her, but to now to make matters more confusing, ever since I’ve known her (it has been about 4 months) we sometimes catch the same bus every now and then, and at times I’m already waiting on the stop, and I see her walking towards the stop, but when I guess she notices that I’m around. She just at once takes another route. Now that I find to me extremely troubling? Does she like me? Or she just hates my guts and can't stand the very sight of me, that she has to completely avoid me? I mean she is shy, but come on how shy can someone be, especially when they are 24 years old you know? And secondly its not like I’m coming off to strong. All I want is to get to know her better first? Why is she acting like this?
-Thanks for reading. Any honest and thoughtful remarks will be most appreciative and helpful. Cheers
Most Helpful Guy
I can appreciate that some women are shy (is she Asian?) but what I can't understand is why you're being so shy.
You need to man up and either burn this bridge (so you can stop wasting your time... 4 months! Really?!... and start focusing on a woman who's not so much work) - OR - step up and make things happen.
Get her number. Get her email. Get her Facebook. If she's really shy she's going to need you to lead EVERYTHING.
- you call her.
- you email her.
- you invite her out for dinner.
- you pick her up.
- you pay.
- you hold her hand.
- you hug her first.
- you kiss her first.
These are all the normal steps every guy should do, but especially in your case.
Until she says "Stop. No thanks. I'm not interested."
Eventually she's either going to stop you, or she's going to end up married to you.
I imagine she would never last this long with you because ultimately her boring shy personality would likely push you away (long term.)
Now go back there, line up a date, and don't leave until you get her number.
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