Why is this girl such a bitch to me?

[Anonymous]

There's this girl I've known for about 3 years, who's sort of friends with my GF. It seems every time we meet, unprovoked, she'll insult me and call me names. The last time this happened was on a night out with friends. She pretty much gave me lip when I had done absolutly nothing. I told my GF, and this other girl who asked if I had a problem with her, to which I said no.

Why is she so horrible with me? Why does she want to start arguments/fights?

Updates

+1 y

I also remember a moment inside the club when she came over, drunk, and asked me what my "problem" with her was.

[Anonymous]

Maybe she likes you and that is her way of expressing affection. maybe that's just how she is as a person. Tell her "you should audition for Jersey Shore, you'd definitely fit in with that crowd." Or something else to shut her up. Or just ignore her. She sounds like a really really annoying fly.
"Do you have a puppy." she pauses, looking confused. If she says yes, say "I figure, female dogs often have puppies." If she says no say "Oh I thought I would ask, you know considering you are a female dog or something."
Or just bring a flyswatter and tap her on the head with it. When she asks why you did that just say "because I swat flies"

[Asker]

I ignore her. Having a conversation with her seems like a giant waste of time.

It's almost as hard as I try to ignore her and go out of my way to avoid her, the more she tries to fuck me over.

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah, people like that don't appreciate being ignored
Tell her you appreciate her input. Being nice will usually throw mean people for a loop

[LikesPlayingDoctor]

I had a similar situation... My question is... Is she "sorta" Friends with your girlfriend or is she a really good friend of your girlfriend. Was she friends with your girlfriend before you were with your girlfriend? Is she possibly jealous that you're taking time away from their friendship? Is your girlfriend possibly talking bad about you behind your back making the friend resent you? Whether that dirt be true or not?

[Asker]

My GF and "the bitch" are sort-of-friends. My GF would never, ever speak crap about me unless, I'm certain.

I don't know why me being with my GF would bother her.

[LikesPlayingDoctor]

Well, it would bother her for a few reasons possibly... One of the reasons might be that she has a crush on you and is aware that you're taken and that you're not attracted to her, and misery loves company of course. The second reason would be that she has a crush on the girlfriend and she knows that she can't have her because of you, so she's directing her anger at you. The third reason would be that she sees you as a threat to their non-sexual friendship as far as you taking time away from their relationship. That's why I was asking you if they're sort of friends or if they're really good friends! The fourth reason that this could be happening is she has a psychological disorder and may need to go on some kind of medication or whatever. Maybe she's bipolar! Maybe she's just a bitch! Maybe somebody told her that you were talking shit about her whether it be true or not! In my case which I said was similar my girlfriend or at this point ex-wife, was really good friends with...

[LikesPlayingDoctor]

This girl named Beth. They were inseparable or also referred to as BFFs. To my face Beth was always very nice and even more than flirtatious with me, even though I would not entertain any type of advances such as that! It got to the point where Beth was talking so much crap behind my back telling people stuff that was not true and I would ask her about it and she would deny deny deny! At one point maybe after I had been dating my ex for six months or so, Beth told my ex that it was either her or me,. So basically, the choice was me. After that incident they remain friends but there was definitely a huge wedge that was driven in the relationship which happened to be me unfortunately. I don't know if you can relate to any of this but hopefully this helps in someway.

[Sara413]

Don't worry about it - if she's not your friend, why bother caring at all, right?

Now, I'd suggest that next time you're out in a group with this girl and she says something rude or insulting to you, just look at her and say "well, that certainly seemed necessary..." or something like that.. use wry sarcasm to make her look/feel stupid for being mean for no reason. That's how I like to handle people who are jerks for no reason - it works to call out their bullshit without actually giving them the satisfaction of getting a ride out of you.

[RationalLioness]

Could be a number of reasons.

She's jealous that you're taking away her friend from her. *Raises hand* I'm supposedly guilty of this. I felt that this one guy was taking away a party friend from me. I got drunk and apparently told him this. I don't remember... but I never intended for him to know. :/

She secretly likes you herself.

She's jealous of the fact that she doesn't have a boyfriend.

She doesn't like you.

There's nothing we can do except make assumptions. Why not simply ask her pointedly?

[Asker]

I don't want to waste my time with such a spiteful brat. She's lost all her, which is hilarious (karma).

[RationalLioness]

Then don't. I'm sure there are other reasons as to why she could be this way. I can't think of any though... lol.

[swimmersam]

It sounds like she may have heard something about you that really ticked her off. That's the only reason I would act that way. But I don't know

[Asker]

Like what?

[swimmersam]

Like maybe you cheated on your last gf I dont really know, it's hard to say because I don't actually know either of you. But that's really the only reason I could think of

[swimmersam]

Or maybe she's a lesbian and has a crush on your gf haha

[Asker]

My ex doesn't know her.

No she's got a boyfriend.

[swimmersam]

Have you ever cheated? Did you ever "talk" to her before or at the same time as your current gf or were you always interested in your gf

[Asker]

No I have never cheated. I have never properly spoken to this bitch.

[swimmersam]

I don't really know, maybe she's just a mean drunk?

[Asker]

She's done it stone sober before, I just think the alcohol accentuated her sour side.

[swimmersam]

She just doesn't sound like a pleasant person, just forget about her and don't worry about it

[BertMacklinFBI]

she just doesn't vibe well with you. this isn't an uncommon scenario, my best friend and his gf's friend does this to him too and it pisses him off every time. she just always insults him and plays it off as a joke and its just annoying as shit.

[Asker]

But why bother? I mean we only share 2 mutual friends, of which one is my GF, and to be honest my GF tells me she does like her. I don't get why someone would put so much effort into hating on someone?

[BertMacklinFBI]

could be a bitchy personality

[Asker]

Well a lot of her "friends" have told me she's just that kind of person, so you're probably right... but I remember in the club she came up to me, drunk, and was telling me what my "problem" with her was lol.

[BertMacklinFBI]

hahaa! sounds like she has something personally against you plus the bitchy personality at best.

[Asker]

I really can't think of anything she'd be mad at.

[BertMacklinFBI]

doesn't have to be something you did, she could just naturally not be fond of you.

[Asker]

There has to be a reason. I've never hated someone without a reason.

[BertMacklinFBI]

you've never had that feeling when you just didn't like someone without even knowing them? basically like judging a book for its cover, of course after getting to know a person though your mind may either change or it will amplify the hatred but it I know A LOT of girls that do shit like that. "no he looks douchey" "he seems like a player" and they let their preconceived notions about a person build up to the point where they already have this natural annoyance or whatever towards them.

[Asker]

"you've never had that feeling when you just didn't like someone without even knowing them?" Yes I have, but there's always a reason I don't like them. I might not know someone but still dislike them by the way they act/dress/speak.

[BertMacklinFBI]

well yeah that's what I meant basically, you initially did not like them because of what you observed without actually getting to know them, that may be the case for your GF's friend but only in this case it just stuck with her and she fed off it.

[BertMacklinFBI]

maybe there are negative experiences she's had in her past that she ties with you. could be many factors involved.

[Asker]

Like going bald? LOL

[BertMacklinFBI]

hahaa maybe, I don't know her personally xD

[Asker]

Well you know enough of her right now: she's a short, bald toad.

[madhatters4]

seems hard to say without knowing more.
- maybe she likes you
- maybe she has heard things about you and doesn't like that you are with her friend
- maybe that's just how she is

[Asker]

I'm hoping it's option # 3.

I can't think of anything I would have done.

[madhatters4]

maybe if you have a moment alone with her you pull her aside and you just ask. I get the feeling like I've done something wrong every time I'm around you. can you please tell me why you seem to act the way you do around me? provide specific examples.

... but the fact that she asks what she's done to you suggest that perhaps she is reacting to a perceived feeling you may have towards her... or perhaps your gf told her something you may have said to your gf

[snuggle_bunny88]

She probably doesn't like you. Or she's being a jealous bitch.

[Asker]

I don't give a damn about what she likes or who she likes, she's nothing to me. What does bother me is that she keeps coming back for more when I make no attempt whatsoever.

[snuggle_bunny88]

She's just trying to get rise out of you. She won't stop until she does. In all honesty, I would kick her ass if I found out she was treating my bf that way.

[Asker]

So I'm stuck in a vicious cycle then... no matter how much I ignore her, she'll continue - great.

[snuggle_bunny88]

Dude, I'm sorry. Maybe eventually she'll get tired of it and finally leave you alone. But that's looking on the bright side.

[Random_chick_2384]

She is probably mad that u stole her best friend.

I don't like my BFFs bf. For several reasons one being that he stole her away from me.

[Asker]

My GF and "the bitch" aren't BBF and never were.

[Random_chick_2384]

I bet she is trying to be cute and flirty but sucks at it and she sounds like a bitch

[Asker]

Karma hit her hard anyway... she's lost all her hair, maybe that's why she's so bitter.

[Asker]

Or maybe that I chose a beautiful, cute and calm girl like my GF, rather then a short, bald, toad like her.

[Random_chick_2384]

Maybe. Just don't let her bother u. And stay away

[BabeBarlow91]

Have you ever called her out on it? Given her a taste of her own medicine?

[Asker]

Why should I even bother?

[BabeBarlow91]

To get to the cause of it. It clearly bothers you and is upsetting yet you allow her to treat you this way. Call her out on her behaviour and ask her why she is treating you this way and saying these things. She will continue until the real issue is laid out on the table between you.

[Asker]

If I go up to her and ask her what her deal is, she's going to know it bothers me and she'll likely continue to pester me.

If I sit back and watch her get bored of it, a sane person would give up. She hasn't.

[BabeBarlow91]

I see where you are coming from but you can use humour in this situation too. For e. g. ask her in front of a group of people and make a joke out it and she how she responds. If she's calling you nasty names, then turn it into a joke. Once she realises that you're too clever for this sort of crap, she will tire of it. She won't tire of it unless you pull the rug from under her feet. The best way is to pull it slowly but steadily. She has struck against you for a reason you can't fathom. She is after acknowledgement from you because in my opinion she likes you and you just don't bother with her. It riles her and causes part of her "problem". Pull the rug.

[Asker]

I've already made jokes about her... but all that does is get her friends in a pickle against me.

God I hope she doesn't like me in that way... what a horrible human being she is.

[BabeBarlow91]

Not jokes about her but to her. You see, the thing here is that we have boy against girl. Girl is being mean to boy and boy is allowing it to happen. Girl will continue to be mean to boy until boy does something about it. It means girl gets to talk to boy and stay in his psyche. Getting it yet?

Boy needs to tell girl that she is funny and he finds her amusing which will confuse girl and make her back off a little bit. Eventually girl will realise that boy is above all this crap and girl will leave boy alone.

It won't happen overnight but boy will win the situation against girl because girl will have used up all of the weapons in her arsenal. Girl will only have charm left (or can she use a gun? Lol) to use against boy but boy is taken by another girl. What can girl do? Feck off and start on somebody else.

[Your_boss960]

Because being that is a part of her personality. Maybe.

[Anonymous]

Well, what have you done to her that you never apologized for?

[Asker]

Nothing (?) ... I've never really spoken to her and she's not a friend, just an acquaintance.

[Opinion Owner]

If your not willing to call her out on it, just forget her a day put urself in a position to be bothered also tell your girlfriend to keep her away from you... it'll help if maybe your girlfriend stop hanging around her too. Especially if it's causing a problem in you guys relationship. Stay far away from that girl!

[Opinion Owner]

She sounds like a fucking bitch, who's probably jealous of you and the relationship your girlfriend has... let her be

[Thrifty]

Bless those who curse you and pray for those who insult. Simple as that.

[Chick180]

Maybe she's just bitchy?

[Asker]

Yes, she's a bitch. A bald bitch - baldilocks.

[Chick180]

Ignore her then. She'll hate that.

[Asker]

That's exactly what I do... but nonetheless she continues.