Why do girls run away when they see interest?

[Anonymous]

Iam just curious tbh , getting close to girls was never easy for me, sure i can be friends with them but becoming romantic was the hardest part, i know guys who do nothing and get dates i have to work much harder, iam tall, smart, go to college, pretty fun and social, lots of friends, iam pretty good looking according to most women and girls i know, i get stared at a lot, complimnted a lot i get signs from girls all the time, basically lots of dudes wish to be in my place, lots of attention from girls, good looks, smart, funny and have many friends , except that... girls throw themselves at me then they back off and run away...

Basically i see girls who give me lots of signs, stare at me a lot and honestly they seem like they want to marry me if they could right there and then... but when i make a move they either withdraw themselves or just ignore my efforts, i dont seem desperate iam fun and interesting , i make my intentions clear but not like " i want to date you " more like " it would nice to get to know you more" and they just disappear...

Shit some girls gave me their numbers !! yet they still act like that, iam talking to this girl right now who was soooo into me, we chatted for days then she just stopped replying after a simple normal question she flat out ignored me...

I know you have reputation and stuff but if iam interested, and you're interested and you show me that you are then i make a move, make an effort and try to keep things going why do you ignore it and dont reply or try to take it any further?

[raio81597]

I know you have reputation and stuff but if iam interested, and you're interested and you show me that you are then i make a move, make an effort and try to keep things going why do you ignore it and dont reply or try to take it any further? <==== If this is what you said to her, then you slut shamed her, women don't want to be labeled as sluts, it's social suicide, it kills their self esteem, next time don't mention the reputation, if she even senses you judging here even when you are not, they will pick up on it, women have a strong sense for things social, for some reason, it's like a mind reading super power.

[Asker]

iam not sure if you're serious or not... do you honestly believe i would ever tell that to a girl?

[raio81597]

I hope not but that is what you wrote at the bottom of your post.

[Asker]

lol no i didn't actually say that i was just making a statement to the girls on this site, this is not something i go tell girls i know that i must play the game no other way but its obvious how things happen.

[raio81597]

Oh good man. Hey while I've got you here, initially I think these women are testing you, if they find out that you take no B. S. then they instinctively reject themselves due to not being able to meet you expectations or standards. Some women may thin that you having expectations or standards is controlling them some how, but the fact is these women are often of low value in the mating game, have nothing to offer a man like you, so they move on to a guy more their level like a desperate needy nice guy for example, someone they can control. I don't know if you are into self improvement type stuff yet I'm rereading a book, to keep my own game tight, it's called "What women want when they test men: How to decode female behavior, pass a woman's tests, and attract women through authenticity."

[Asker]

Well, i understand that it does work like that kinda so yeah it makes sense to me, as for improving myself yes iam the kind of person who always tries improving, physically, mentally and in anyway possible i've improved in two years more than some guys have in 10 , i still have a lot to learn i read articles , i experiment and i see what works best with girls and for me , i also make sure to look amazing whenever i go out and the ladies seem to absolutly love it which is cool, but iam just not very lucky when it comes to girls i usually attract taken girls ( happened at least few times in the past few months ) or there no girls to date around me.

[Asker]

basically i have never in my life liked a girl who liked me back and wasn't taken , they are super hot and they like me , however 100% of them are already taken which really gets me down sometimes...

[raio81597]

Perhaps try online dating, most all of the women there are single. Things like Tinder or adult friend finder, are hookup sites, many of those women are taken, you won't get a quality woman there that's loyal to you and wants a committed relationship. It of course depends on if you want hookups or a relationship. You're doing well just I think your looking for unattached women in all the wrong places, women in clubs are either attached, broken or just seeking attention and validation, they don't offer a man of your worth and value anything that you would be satisfied with. Check out Scott McKay from X&Y communications, he has very good advice in this area, he's down to earth and recommends Match. com as the preferred date site, it's where he met his wife Emily.

[raio81597]

Thank you for MHO!! :)

[Anonymous]

SHY girls aloof. Forget them. Date me lol they must not see a challenge in you. Those girls are lame. Build up sexual chemistry with a girl I guarantee she'd feel the same as you. I'm just bring honest, yet I'd love a guy like you, but those girls sound shallow...

[Opinion Owner]

Shy girls and aloof girls will come around, but the girls you mentioned arnt worth it.

[Asker]

iam not even sure anymore honetly i dont usually give a fuck, i try to be nice to a girl at first so i can get to know her and make her feel uncomofrtable but no matter how shy or aloof she is or how strong her character is, apparently giving a shit does not seem to work and i dont give shit i honestly dont i just give a shit in the begging to make her feel comfy about talking to me so i can be myself more later on but for some reason girls show me lots of attention but when i try making a move they dont respond, and iam not even throwing myself at them or doing anything out of the ordinary...

[Opinion Owner]

First off all you sound like a hypocrite.. So you want to make a girl feel comfortable because you care, but you don't even care about making a girl comfortable... so you can be comfortable later? I don't know you're a nice guy. I have all those qualities yet looking for a guy whose similar to you who actually cares. I don't have a perfect answer for you, but to just keep looking. How old are you anyway?

[Asker]

caring doesn't seem to bring results so i learned not to care , i only care if it actually happens and we're together and yes i want her to feel comfy talking to me i want her to know that she can text me when feels like it , am not a hypocrite iam just that i want her to know that she can talk to me so i act a little more intersted than i usually am, then i just act less interested if its not as intersting ( whatever we're talking about) i mean you can't expect me to be truly interested about you buying a new shoes right? also iam 20

[Opinion Owner]

Hahah makes complete sense.. Its okay.. just don't turn into an asshole please. You can still be nice but don't let women walk all over you.

[Asker]

i dont lol which is why they seem interested, sure looks matter but me not being interested gets them interested... go figure

[Opinion Owner]

Hahah I know right... dating is hard don't give up

[Asker]

i have no choice i can't give up, girls dont just come to me i have to work to get them so giving up means no girls , but yeah lots of girls act weird and i just dont get it sometimes i am good at reading some girls but others make no sense whatsoever.

[Opinion Owner]

Lol I feel you. I go through the same thing

[Anonymous]

Maybe you are pursuing is taking too long, I normally head for the hills if I'm working harder than you are.

[Asker]

Except that she wasn't

[Opinion Owner]

What makes you say she wasn't. .. going out her way to be around u... call or text for no real reason, laughed at all ur jokes touchy , flirty. . she wasn't doing any of that stuff?

[Asker]

No not really i saw her 3-4 times at her work place the most we had said in person was " hi, i need this and this" and her saying " sure it will take 10 mins" after teh 4th time i added her on facebook and started chatting with her, she was responsive not that much but she did respond i made sure to always have something to say and keep it interesting and fun, we talked for a day then the next during talking i deleted a text and she got all curious about wanting to know why its so "important" and why i delted it, so after pursuing me for like 10-15 min i told her that i would love to know her more and it doesn't usually happen to me with new people but it has happened with her , basically she got much more active and started talking more and sending more texts, she even sent me two pictures of her shirt and house enterance, i thought "cool she seems to like " so we kept talking and halfway through.4 days later she just stopped texting...

[Asker]

she was telling me that she's going to work and she hates it i was like " well is it far and thats why you hate it?" she just went numb and stopped talking, iam pretty sure i did not do anything wrong, in fact i did everything right and evne gave her few chances to turn me down and excuse herself from talking to me but she didn't she kept texting me whenever i messaged her and her texts are usually after less than a minute of me sending a text... also whenever she saw me in person she would keep staring at me, get really nervous, can't focus on other things but me... classic signs of attraction , even my friends noticed.

[Opinion Owner]

So ok then, may be she miss read ur signals, maybe she thought u were looking for a best friend

[Asker]

no not really i have 300 friends on facebook and all my friends are guys and she knows them, also iam pretty sure i made it obvious i am looking for a relationship not a friend i dont do the female friends thing.

[Asker]

also i flirted with her

[Anonymous]

They are dumb. Some of us really don't want bad boys. Sigh. Please keep trying.

[Asker]

well iam not completley nice tbh or a badboy iam inbetween i am not a dick most of the time but take no BS, so if a girl thinks she can use me iam gone, i 've done it before and will do it again.

[Asker]

thank you though :)

[KathrynTaylor]

Are you coming across as creepy/stalky/desperate? Are you cocky or selfish, unkind or tight arsed? These things scare women off..