Shy guy? If he likes me why doesn't he text/call me?

[Anonymous]

I like this guy and when we're out he shows signs that he likes me e.g. pats me on the head, pretends to fight, teases me etc. If he is interested then why doesn't he contact me? It's strange but it's as if he loves seeing me over a long period of time because it makes it more exciting if he haven't heard from each other. Anyway, I'm going to invite him to a festival coming up in a few weeks. It will be a group outing so hopefully he will come. It's in 2 weeks time, do you think I should invite him about a week before? What should I say?

Thank you! P.S He's never had a girlfriend before so maybe he's shy.

[TimeAndTimeAgain]

He's shy. From what you said, my main guess would be that he doesn't think you'd be interested in him if he made a move, so he doesn't bother making on because well, let's be honest - things would be awkward if you turned him down. Since he likes you and you two are already sort of friends, he'd rather keep things the way they are, than risk them getting awkward. What you want to do from there is your decision. You can try showing him that you ARE interested in him, and see if he gets the hint and goes for you, OR you can take matters into your own hand and ask him out.

Watch the movie "She's Out of My League", and you'll see a case where the girl's interested in the guy, and the guy is also interested, but obviously he doesn't think he stands a chance and just "hangs around", but she asks him out VERY quick, which is sort of unrealistic though in the movie the reason for why she asked him out real quick is explained. In real life it's more common for people to know each other for a longer time first.

The point is, some guys are interested in you, but because they think they don't have a chance, they stick to being just friends. It's a bad mistake in most cases because usually girls end up not being attracted to them anymore and the guy gets put in the "friend zone" if you know what I mean. Probably don't, because I sort of think girls don't even realize they put guys in the "friend zone".

[madfox]

why don't you give him a text first. it'll show him that you're thinkin of him and it'll encourage him to text you in the future.

and as for how early should you invite him. it doesn't really matter there. but the earlier you ask him the less likely he'll make other plans during the festival. and what do you mean what should you say? just ask him straight up if he wants togo to a festival with you and whoever else. keep it simple.

[crystalis]

I just read this book "He's just not that into you." By Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccilloo. From the section "Not calling" I recommend you get this book.

As women we tend to make excuses for men. If he's not calling you, you aren't on his mind. If a guy is into you he calls. Don't be around someone who doesn't do what they say they're are going to do. "Busy" or "Shy" is an excuse, he's an ass. And you deserve a call.

Don't take it personal, you are wonderful. Men just don't know how to tell you the truth.

[TimeAndTimeAgain]

Again with this thing. Well, again I will say it, and in caps to make sure you get the message - JUST BECAUSE HE DOESN'T CALL OR MESSAGE, DOESN'T MEAN HE'S NOT INTO YOU!!! OK?! No, it doesn't mean he's an ass. An ass is someone who's already close to you, VERY closee to you, BEYOOOND the point of being shy, and STILL doesn't bother to call you. In that case, and OOONLY in that case, it means he's not into you.

It DOES NOT apply to guys you have JUST MET. ESPECIALLY guys who've never had a GF.

[crystalis]

Get the book, I'm no expert. But if a guy is into you he finds away to contact you. New to your or not.

[crystalis]

Timeandtimeagain is male and 23. He doesn't want the secret out, to lose his game. I am 38 female who has been in dating game way longer.

If this guy was shy he wouldn't flirt with you. We want to make excuses instead of facing reality. Think to yoursel if you want something you go after it, nothing stops you.

[Longshot]

I think you're right -- he's the shy type. So ask him to the festival, as you said, a week in advance. Just tell him the festival is coming up and you'd like to go with him. He'll be fine with that.