Am I insecure or is he just a jerk?

[mariahlopez]

I am dating a guy who treats me like he is better then me. He dresses somewhat upscale has a good job and 2 automobiles(but still lives with his mom..he is only 22) and has away of saying little comments that make me feel low. I am a single mom and my finances are tight so I can't afford a car or all the fancy labels and designer clothes. All I have to my name is a studio apt , a degree in nursing and a caring heart. I use to have low self esteem but as I grew up I become vary confident in myself and the compliments from other men didn't hurt either . Before I met him I was the girl who was confident and humble. But he has a way of making me feel ugly and all my guy friends say I am crazy for staying with him but due to the fact that I am a caring person I don't want to just let him go,and I want him apart of my life I just wish he would stop being so mean. How do I tell him how he makes me feel without looking like a insecure baby.

[topnotch69]

First off, I don't think your being a baby or insecure. The guy sounds like he thinks he's better than everyone else. Which indicates that HE is really the one with low self-esteem. By him putting you or others down and using material things to make him feel like he's ballin. Please. Also , I think its really unclassy and un-gentlemen like for a guy to do this to his girl. I can tell you are intelligent and I'm sure all of this you already know.

I am in a realationship with the same type of guy and unfortunately just sitting down and telling him how his behavior sometimes makes you feel , won't get you the results your hoping to achieve. The real problem is something within him. He has issues and past exeriences that have done some damage. Ya know , either that or the alternative is that he's just a d*ck.

You can leave him and he may realize what he's lost and change up...good luck sweetie. I think you deserve a better man who will treat you like a princess and make you feel special.

[Anonymous]

nope he sounds like a jerk. call him on something he says if it offends you, don't just keep it inside

you are a caring person at the detriment to yourself. time to stop being so passive and put yourself first. you say that you're single mom...would you want your daughter to date a guy like this and put up with it? would you want your son to treat girls like this? you can't change how someone's character is but you sure can change how you deal with them, if at all. stop thinking that its your responsiblity to keep someone who is a jerk to you in your life. its not. why would you want someone who's mean to you to be a part of your life? think about that

[Longshot]

Your Boyfriend is insecure. Secure people don't need to make snide comments. When he makes another comment tell him he consistently does this. When he says no he doesn't or I'm just joking, tell him you will point it out whenever he does it -- he'll get the message.

You should not be a victim of his insecurity.

[martyfellow]

This sounds like a mismatch...I'd dump him. He'll only get worse with time. If he's that insensitive and arrogant as a casual boyfriend imagine how he'll get if you step closer to him with time!

[Anonymous]

He won't change, if he is ruining your confidence and self esteem it will get worse and you will find it hard to get over him. It also shows he doesn't really value you, he has more control over the relationship