It's a terrible conundrum, one that makes no sense and is self-defacing. Yet, I can't help it. What should I do?
Most Helpful Girl
i know what you mean, its been years for me and I still miss him but don't contact him or anything I feel like its his call to do that because he dumped me. Anyways, time and distance helps, get rid of everything that reminds you of her, stop going places that you went with her, just distract yourself whenever you think of her, focus in school go out with friends, find that one friend you can let it out to and talk with about it, music helps a lot, I love going for a nice jog hearing music its so relaxing. Music helps me get my mind off of things and makes me think of other scenery in my head...a lot of people say to start dating other people and meet new girls, but only do it when you are emotionally ready to give some other girl a chance, without being rebound, and without thinking she will be better or will be similar to the last girl...you have to have an open mind and realize everyone is different and you won't find a perfect match because no one is perfect, you have to get to know a girls imperfections and her inner beauty in order to realize she just might be 'perfect' for you after all...
its tough I won't lie. I don't even think we'll ever forget these people, the only difference though when it comes to successfully moving on, is not wanting to be with them anymore, and being indifferent about their existence.
Find another activity. Focus on yourself, go out with your buddies, go to the gym, and if your ready meet new people. I find that the best way to get over someone is by taking care of yourself, because then it gives you reassurance. You came into this world without them, you can make it without them. There's too many fish in the sea. I know this is not easy but take it step by step. You should always be OK with yourself, before making anybody happy. That includes knowing you can live without them and can move on.
there is no way you can stop missing someone (temporarily). no matter what you do it will keep coming back. just give it time. as long as you don't see that person anymore, the feeling of missing her will just go away (I hope :) )
I find the only solution is to find someone else. At first it serves to distract you from your moping, and then if you're really getting out there and meeting peeps, lo and behold you meet someone else special and that first person doesn't seem to matter anymore.
I have had this problem a lot recently, especially seeing as the few girls I've dated, have all come back with boyfriends over our respective breaks and we never manage to keep in touch, no matter the circumstance, so I speak from experience.
The best thing is to assure yourself that things aren't always for certain and that these things happen to many other people, all over the world. It's perfectly normal to miss someone and its okay to miss them, but not forever. I give myself 3 days to figure things out and to stop missing them and move on. If they're not paying attention to me, then I shouldn't waste my time on them, when I could be living life and building better things for myself.
Thing is, I don't usually meet terribly many new people that way, cause I'm still brooding,to a degree haha, but I keep myself occupied. Work and school don't let me rest often enough to allow me to focus on it too much. Instead, that way, I have more of a balance.
Simply eating right also helps improve my mood and presents a whole new outlook on my life and makes me more intellectually deep :P Or at least feel like it.
Dont make someone a priority who only see's you as an option. This includes missing them, like you say they don't miss you so why miss them ? If its a girl your missing then go out and meet new ones, never compare new girls to her though. I did this after my break up with my ex and I was never happy, I only started being happy when I took her of the pedestal and looked at new girls and what I liked about them not what was better than the ex.
Another thing that helped me was philosophy, looking at the life and the bigger picture makes you realize how insignificant things like these are on the whole and it helps you put a perspective on life, helps you move on and make the most of your life.
Life is short, don't linger on what you can't change, be happy, treat people well and enjoy your life. Don't hold grudges and don't look back in anger (great song for moving on as it happens) like I say life is too short !