Guys, why do you try to make girls jealous?

If you and a girl are actively flirting and it's clear enough that she likes you and you like her why would you all of a sudden start trying to make her jealous by flirting with other girls right in front of her. Doesn't it make more sense to just flirt with the girl you like and have that move forward? If a guy starts flirting with another girl in front of me my first instinct is to move on and assume he isn't that into me...So why do you guys do this


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Most Helpful Guy

  • it doesn't work on men, but it works on women.

    Jealous promotes needy and clingy behavior. It makes women fight for their man and show more interest, call more often and thus it works.

    The problem with making a man jealous is the fact that it makes him LESS attractive. He becomes needy and clingy, he calls more and suddenly you like him less.

    The other thing it does, is like you said, it makes you assume he doesn't like you, which is actually to his benefit.

    If he shows too much interest, then he's creepy.

    If he shows none, than he's safe.

    If he shows Disinterest, then you like him.

    Creepy is showing interest too soon for no good reason, combined with wanting it more than the other person.

    And if you want it more than he does (which now you are thinking about him now because of what he did, which means you are more invested in him than you were before, and more than some joe blow that you blew off 2 seconds ago) Then it works.

    When its not working, its working.

    And that's why men do it.

    Men would not do it, if women didn't train men to behave this way.

    Its obviously asshole behavior, but as we all know, women like assholes. SO congrats, you get what you ask for.

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    • Noooo that's actually not true. This part 'The other thing it does, is like you said, it makes you assume he doesn't like you, which is actually to his benefit.'

      Because when a girl doesn't think a guy likes them most of them actually get mad and give up after a few attempts. Like that whole hot and cold thing guys use, that only works for awaile, at least with me. Then I'm done.There's only so much a girls heart can take.

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    • If you prove to a man that you don't play games (stop testing, be upfront and honest about what you "really" feel) then a man will be more than happy to stop playing games.

      Unfortunately most women will be turned off and leave a man if he stops playing games.

      Even if she stops.

      For instance when a man says "i like you and want to date you" in the first 3 minutes of talking to a woman, he's being honest, he does. he's not playing games. But then she's creeped out, and he has to play games.

    • I feel the same, and I'm a woman. Dating a guy who is flirting around with other women, is extremely unattractive. I've always left that kind of guys, thinking that they can enjoy the other women they are flirting around with instead. If a guy already hurt me from the beginning, what else can he do?

Most Helpful Girl

  • Guys try to make girls jealous out of insecurity. It's a stupid thing to do, I know, and not all guys do so, but some immature guys will try to test you by flirting with other girls. The best you can do is ignore him.

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What Guys Said 3

  • Because it makes you think about us more and keeps the spark.

    It's a stupid thing, and I wish we didn't have to do it, but it works.

    Girls don't like feeling like they're the only one until it's a relationship.

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  • It shows that he's having a great time with other people. If at a party, i will too try to engage conversations with random people.

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  • some guys are players and some use that make the girl jealous thing to test a girl to see if she really wants to keep him ... ya know that posession thing and if she doesn't care to want to do anything to keep the guy than the girl doesn't want the guy ...

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    • Or if she doesn't care, she may just walk away because she doesn't want to get hurt... And because making someone jealous is an extremely unattractive method, she actually might have been turned off by the guy at this time.

What Girls Said 3

  • Honestly I hate it when guys flirt with other girls it bothers me especially when U really really like that guy a lot and he's just with another girl laughing and having a great time right there in front of u the first time I got jealous was when I didn't even know what the word was for having this kind of weird feeling once I found out I was like ohhhhhh so that's what it feels like to be jealous but I hate the feeling so much then it just makes u wonder all day does he like the other girl and not me was he playing me and it just makes the girl each day just get over that guy 1 by 1

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  • This tactic doesn't wash with me. It smacks of desperation and insecurity and I don't feed it by reacting. It doesn't make me feel special, it makes me feel embarrassed for him. It's usually done by guys who feel I'm out of their league, like they are trying to tell me they are in hot demand, so how lucky am I to have him. If you want to push a woman away, then this is a good move. Otherwise, don't do it.

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  • He's trying to see your reaction, see how into him you actually are...sad but true. Now the next move from you is to let him know how to treat you. If you blow it off then he knows he can do whatever he wants whenever he wants and get away with it. If you don't blow it off then he will, or at least he SHOULD, never do that again because he knows there's a possibility of losing you and then he will be stuck with one of those nameless ones he was flirting with, and I'm sure he doesn't really want that anyway.

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