How are fat/less attractive girls getting with fine guys? are the guys taking advantage of low self esteem?

i've been seeing this pairing a lot lately. any reason as to why fine guys are starting to date girls that aren't that cute? I always thought a really good looking guy could damn near get any girl he wanted so why would he date an ugly girl? well maybe not "ugly" as in hideous but he's a 10 and she's like a 4, he could do so much better so why is he with her?

you hear all the time that men are visual creatures. men even say it themselves. most guys want beautiful women and don't have much regard for unattractive women...so why would a good looking guy date down? is it REALLY for personality or do you think these girls have low self esteem and feel lucky to date guys like this so they are doing really nasty sexual things or maybe giving him money (sugar mama)?

what is it? is it REALLY because of personality reasons or something more sinister?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Ohhhh girl I know! It is like a trend lately, ugly fat girls and sexy guys. I assume it's just like they are easier targets because they will get with anyone, and they will have sex sooner than pretty classy girls.

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    • yea that's what I think too girl. either that or they must be paying their rent lol

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    • What about the men who aren't interested in casual sex and aren't looking for a woman who "drops it on a dime"? Seriously, you need to open your eyes.

    • Thanks for best answer! And ugly girls obviously drop it pretty quick, that's how they get bfs

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What Guys Said 11

  • I have to be honest. One of the biggest things a girl needs to be to keep my interest is to be secure in who she is. I would rather date a less attractive girl who was comfortable with it and didn't obsess over her looks than a hot girl who did. Whenever anyone obsesses over their looks to me it seems like insecurities that will manifest themselves in ways that will introduce a lot of unwanted drama into our relationship.

    In other words, even more important than looks are:

    She must be LAID BACK, DRAMA FREE, and MENTALLY STABLE. And when she obsesses over losing 5 lbs, or tanning, or stuff like that, then I would highly doubt she was those things.

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    • This morning a woman walked into my work who was overweight but attractive. She could definitely stand to lose about 30-35 lbs. But she had a pretty face and, more than that, when she spoke, she came off as intelligent, secure, friendly, and an overall pleasant person to be around. That would definitely have been enough for me to try to chat her up if I wasn't at work.

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    • Lol I would expect someone who doesn't have the looks to offer to go for other non attractive people... Just saying. Anyways I have a boyfriend who loves me so I could careless what you think about me.

    • Looks aren't what you're offering. They're just the bait. Once the person has sunk their teeth in, it no longer matters at all.

  • well I'd sure date a girl who was less attractive than me if she had a personality to make up for it :) I think loads of guys would.

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    • would you really want to be with a girl like that or would you just be tolerating her?

    • I'd really want to be with her. But I wouldn't find her ugly, I'd just not find her perhaps as attractive as a girl I could get, but no matter if she's more amazing. I wouldn't that a girl I found unattractive though.

  • Seriously, it has a lot to do with personality, a hot girl or pretty girl that is a bitch or thinks to highly of herself becomes ugly to me. If on the other hand she is not self obsorbed, friendly, carries a little extra weight or not as pretty,well, her personality may win her over a lot of guys.

    Oh, and yeah, girls that are all that tend to be high maintence, a lot of guys get tired of that. A smart guy in the end will realize that looks fade and it is what is inside that matters.

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  • beauty to you isn't necessarily beauty to someone else. we are all very different and it is no different when choosing a partner. beauty is in the eye of the beholder :)

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    • yeah but there are some people who are just universally attractive and some who are universally unattractive...like rosie o'donnell. who thinks she's hot? lol but thx for your input

    • I understand what you mean but just because someone is considered universally unattractive it doesn't mean that someone isn't attracted to them. I guess if the guy is 'considered more attractive' then he's the bigger man for not caring what people may think.

  • Because some guys aren't shallow and actually value a woman for her personality.

    So maybe you should stop being so shallow and insulting to other people, and you might become more attractive...

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What Girls Said 7

  • I have seen this and usually the partner you might consider a 10 doesn't really think of themselves in those terms. They also are attracted to a look that you may consider a 4 but they do not.

    I do believe all initial dating starts with physical attraction, but what each of us considers attractive runs the gamut. I do understand some of what you are saying but, really, most guys want to be with someone they consider attractive even for one night stands or FWB. In those situations they could really care less about your personality or a lot of other things, but they won't be able to sleep with someone they cannot stand seeing naked.

    Oh, and I disagree that most men want beautiful women. Most men want women they are attracted to. A lot of guys will say that they would sleep with a beautiful woman but would never make her a girlfriend because they either think she would be too high maintenance or that she will eventually move on to another guy that they think could offer her more than they can. Some guys are completely intimidated by "beautiful" women.

    The whole sugar mama thing, thankfully, most guys just don't want to live off a woman. Yes, some guys would be happy to have a woman support them, but most guys derive their self esteem from their work. They may enjoy having a woman they don't have to support but they won't stick with an unattractive woman for money.

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  • Your a bitch.

    Why do you think that everybody thinks the same way you do? Obviously if he is dating her he likes the way she looks and her personality.You are so stuck up, I highly doubt that any guy will EVER Date you. Chances are if you ever get in any relationship, you will scare him off with your expectations and you digusting personality.

    "Beauty is in the eyes of the Beholder". There also is this thing called a personality and obviously you have never heard of that with your low IQ.

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  • Umm because beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Obviously the guy likes the way she looks or he wouldn't be with her. Maybe the girls have great personalities too. You just sound like a dumb bitch. There's someone out there for EVERYONE. Just because you think the girl is ugly doesn't mean the guy thinks she is. Your personslity is very ugly so maybe that's why you're not getting the guys...

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  • Because all guys arnt as shallow as people portray.. Maybe you can learn a thing or two from these guys and stop judging base on looks!

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  • Yeah, God forbid the "ugly girl" actually has a nice, outgoing personality, and that's why he wants her. Where in the world do you get the idea that she must be doing dirty sexual things with him and giving him money? I mean, seriously? That's a mean thing to think. A guy that's a 10 will have a lot of girls after him, if sex and money were all he cared about he could get them without having to get in a relationship with a girl he's not attracted to. There are plenty of hot girls who engage in slutty behavior, no attachment necessary. He clearly likes the girl or he wouldn't be with her, simple as that. He doesn't see it as "dating down". Men do have brains, they recognize other qualities in a girl that they find attractive. You make it seem like visual creature=basic creature, as if they can't see beyond looks. If that were true, it'd be really sad.

    Besides, it shouldn't matter to you anyway. Why would you want to date a guy that would be with a girl only for nasty sex and money? His personality would be sh*t.

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    • Thank you.

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    • @ lucky in response to ALL this talk about 'universal standards of beauty', I'll have you know that I have ALWAYS looked at the women who were presented as 'universally beautiful' and scratched my head. NEVER got it.

      And since I think that way, it stands to reason that there are other people who also think that way.

    • Good be done because I will never agree

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