Why are teens and young adults so obsessed with partying?

[Anonymous]

the more I think about it the more ridiculous it is to me. I know "it's fun" and whatever, but can't you find other things to do? not to mention most people that party only party with a party crowd. there are people like me that are really lonely and truthfully don't understand why. I'm a good looking kid, I'm smart, I have great style that is trendy but that actually looks nice and isn't trashy and that doesn't make me look like a meathead, and I have an awful lot to offer other people. I'll be your best friend, and to all the girls out there, I'd probably be the best boyfriend you ever had. all the freakin idiots girls go out with anymore...

i love music, I love people and socializing, but I hate drugs and weed and really don't enjoy drinking very much. I was talking to a friend of mine a couple of weeks ago, and he said that I wouldn't like parties, because people there aren't looking to really "get to know" and really talk to people. he said most girls at some of his college parties would find me creepy and think that I would be out to take advantage of them in my sobriety, which is the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my life. (and drunk guys won't try and do the same? they'd even be more inclined to!) I'm serious, girls don't think. they're afraid of being the victim of some sort of sexual mistreatment, yet they constantly hang out with the guys that are more likely to do something, and feel that a put together guy is "out to get them". I'll never understand their thought process behind that. sorry.

i don't even want a fling or casual relationship. I just want to meet new people because frankly I don't have many friends anymore, but it turns out most people are so stuck in the ways of being young and cool and rebellious that they aren't even open to the finer things in life (I'm not saying I'm the best thing since sliced bread either, I'm saying I merely have all the best of intentions and there's a great person inside if people would just take the time to realize it).

and the fact that people are so superficial about their lifestyle anymore. I've always wondered why I'm constantly left out of all the fun. honestly, I'm happy and proud of who I am, and happy I'm not apart of the 80% of peers that have a completely backwards train of thought, but that doesn't mean I don't enjoy being around these people, or that I don't want to be their friends, or that I'll judge them because they like to drink or smoke when I don't. I don't like it... doesn't mean I don't like them. I just don't understand people and their choices a lot of the time.

[heavenonearth]

Well, I'm like you in the sense that I don't drink or smoke, however, I do still go out and party. It's just a part of college life, and it's not like that's all I do for fun, but I do go on occasion. I have a good time dancing and socializing, and my friends don't mind that I don't do more than that. Most of them don't drink to point that they're falling down drunk anyway. You should try going with people who aren't going to pressure you into anything.

I do kind of agree with your friend though, college parties aren't the right places to really get to know people and ask them out or something. Personally I like to be in my right mind at parties, because sober or not it's not a good idea to trust random guys there. No offense to the guys who really mean well, but there are plenty who don't. I still talk to people, and I'm a pretty good judge of character, so I'm not going to assume bad things without a reason, but I do tend to hang out more with the group I came with.

[tc231]

I've kind of noticed that it's okay for girls not to drink, but guys are expected to drink. You could always hold a beer in your hand, or a "mixed drink" that is really pop so people get off your back. Girls especially do not want guys judging their drunken actions, and if the guy is drunk, he can't judge.

[Asker]

yes not to mention a lot of girls subconsciously want a guy to fix in whatever way. because deep down they dislike substances as well a lot of times. guys are just expected to be jackholes in general.

[SweetApathy]

link TL;DR, but gonna try to answer small wonderfully short question with link. Hm, read this in Library. Had something to do with reasoning for persons age 13-25. K, hope helps.

[Asker]

this looks great thanks! part of me is petrified of raising a teenager tbh.

[SweetApathy]

Yeah, me too. I think I'd rather adopt a teenager than see them pass from child to adolescence. You'd do fine, just give them room to breathe.

[jackflynn7]

Modern culture has left young people with little else but profiling {hair, clothes, make-up and grooming) face book, hanging out, sexuality and computer gaming. You almost never hear about creative arts or other visions because dedication to th is not cool.

I am amazed by the obsession young people have with sexual body parts being "normal", with pubic hair, volume and strength of ejaculation and other details. It is no wonder they are such a mess. They are bored with the lack of choices they have (wtf is sculpture?) and insecure about things they can't change (penis size, areola color, etc.)

I'm so glad I'm not in teens or 20's.

[Asker]

i agree. genuine art isn't as appreciated anymore. in fact it seems to have become uncool to be a visionary of the arts. the mass media is littered with so much obscene material anymore, I honestly wonder if people are that clueless about it since it has seemed to become a cultural norm.

i'm not thrilled with my age a lot of times heh.

[jackflynn7]

You expended far too much time and effort on your rant. As I did in the day, you need to pick a better game to play. Take up something that consumes you and let the game you play define you and separate wheat from chaff.

[Asker]

i've tried that too. I have had my own things going for me, including a job as I go to school. and I do live out my hobbies in a social aspect, and in fact have taken them beyond just the local scene. so idk, I still have trouble. I think I'm depressed from an overall lack of peer to peer interaction since high school, and that's the honest truth.

[kheserthorpe]

Instead of listening to what your friends tell you you'd think about parties, why don't you try just going and being the happy guy who is so comfortable with himself you say you are, and see what happens?

If you don't judge and can like people fine, and that's really true, hopefully it comes through in your attitude when you're there.

Just go.

[Asker]

every time I've told my friends to invite me, and have expressed interest in going, they're like "yeeeah brooo! we're gunna get you so drunkk!" and all that, then when the time comes, do I get an invite? no. they seem so enthusiastic, yet the fact that they've never owned up to their word is what agitates me.

[Anonymous]

I'm way too tired to read your entire question.

I don't really get it either. I get invited to parties because people who throw them think I'm cool. The thing is, they think I'm cool because I'm not like everybody else. I don't like getting drunk, I'll smoke weed with my bros sometimes but I'm not a huge fan of it., and I'm not for the whole random hookup thing either. I'll go sometimes, just to make an appearance, talk to a few people I know and schmooze a little bit.

Parties aren't too cool though. Everybody just makes themselves look like idiots, but they can't tell because they're all so drunk. I'm also never going to a party with high school kids invited anymore because none of them can hold their liquor and they don't know how to hit on girls without being crude.

[Asker]

and see? that's what I'm saying. by the way, aren't most kids under the legal drinking age at these? yep. should they be drinking in the first place? nope. but they do, because a lot of kids don't seem to know any better. idk.

i'm really not trying to sound like a d***.

[Opinion Owner]

well, you kind of "learn better" by drinking a lot, but yeah...U.S. parties were all underage drinkers. here in Van, most of us are of age, but as art students, we don't party as much as you'd think.

[toocool2]

ur a bitch

[toocool2]

u don't like to party you like to cause riots in the street when you lost the stanley cup what losers. you have the worst fans and worst people glad I don't like in canada.

[toocool2]

live*

[Asker]

well that was a little unnecessary there guy.

[Opinion Owner]

I'm from the US, I just live in Van for school and I don't really give a f*ck about hockey or any other organized sport for that matter. dude, why did those comments get deleted? I don't know what they said.

[toocool2]

and I don't give a f*** that you eat girls out your ugly anyways

[Opinion Owner]

oh, I see them now. I don't see how not enjoying inebriating myself in a large group of people makes me a bitch.

[Opinion Owner]

wow, I must have struck a nerve with you somehow. I didn't ask you to give a f*** about my personal sexual activity? And I'm not ugly, at all. I know that for a fact. Your comments are crude, the only thing you're insulting is your own intelligence.

[Asker]

i'm on the answer's side of this one ;)

[vmw2008]

So your issue is not really why people are obsessed with partying, but why you are left out?

[Asker]

a bit of both. I don't understand people's constant need for attention and to the level they crave it, their questionable decisions, and their constant desire to be the coolest person to the point of making a questionable decision, all to get that attention. I hope that makes sense. and as for myself. I don't understand why being above that kind of influence should result in me being left out and alone a lot. I think I'm a pretty cool kid without having to prove my coolness to everybody else.

[vmw2008]

Well one, I party, and it has nothing to do with constant need for attention and needing to be cool. It's just fun! it's social, I have a great time, I meet people constantly, it's a stress-relief, etc.

Two, you're left out because you think you are better than partying and people who party. You have negative stereotypes about those people. That's how you come across anyway. As a girl who enjoys partying, I wouldn't want to hang out with someone like that either.

[Anonymous]

I don't understand why you asked this "question"! I don't actually see a question there!

What is your problem? What is the issue you wanna fix?

Or it is just a rant?

[Asker]

i'm just asking for personal feedback so I can better wrap my head around this issue.

[Opinion Owner]

I think you have no idea what do you really want! You condemn those who party not because of alcohol or anything, but because of... fun?

You say you're non-judgmental and good guy but somehow it doesn't go together with what you say, it doesn't go together with problems about socializing!

I'll make a guess - you're religious! You give religiosity vibes!

I sense a lot of inner conflict in what you've written but no sense at all!

[Asker]

yes I was raised religiously. so what? my post made a lot of sense by the way.

[Opinion Owner]

That's the thing! Your religion tries to inject anti-hedonism to you! And your natural response is to resist it! You're in inner turmoil!

You really wanna party, you wanna socialize with your friends and you want to meet girls and want to have a girlfriend.. but subconsciously you try to rationalize why partying is "bad"!

I'll put it such way - alcohol and drugs are bad! But partying itself is not bad!

[Asker]

that's exactly how I feel! sorry I didn't specify that more clearly. partying is fine, it's just that I feel kids take it too far a lot of times.

[Anonymous]

It's your attitude. The reason why you don't have friends/gf/etc is because of your "holier than thou" attitude. You seem to think you are the greatest person on the planet.

[Asker]

i just explained that I don't feel that way. funny you say that though. I was raised in a religious household. we went to church pretty much every Sunday when I was growing into my teen years, I was in the youth group for a while, before the kids there started separating themselves from me because I went to a public school... I just can't catch a break with people!

[Opinion Owner]

No, re-read your question. You just explained why you think you are amazing.

It's not "catching a break with people" when they decide to be your friend or not. It's your personality. Either they like who you are or they don't. Judging by how you worded your question I'm not surprised why they distanced themselves from you.

If you are nice, friendly and helpful with people you can make friends easily.

[Asker]

which is why anybody I've met in the past 6 months that I haven't known before, from the school I went to or anything, seems to be cool with me. a lot of people seem to be cool with me actually, just not "cool" enough to go out and hang with them on a Friday night and "get hammered"

i feel as though people have a level of respect for me yet don't find me a good enough fit for their social circle, so they don't talk to me much.

[taster]

It seemed like the thing to do at the time? ..I am not obsessed...I just like to do it every time I get the chance...(:

[Xx_DRE_xX]

Im not, Its really f***ing dumb & boring but funny to just watch drunks make a fool of themselves.

[Asker]

totally missed your answer sorry! its definitely only entertaining for so long, then it starts to concern me. having been around people that are hammered, it honestly scares me, like I'm afraid for that particular person. I've also had to monitor kids that have drank so much that they passed out. not fun at all. really scary.

[Xx_DRE_xX]

They shouldn't be your responsibility.

[Asker]

you're right they shouldn't, but when they aren't responsible themselves, that's where someone else comes in, which has been me a couple of times. that's exactly what I'm trying to say though, people don't behave responsibly a lot of times. and (also on a general standpoint) that scares me how people act and think its OK for them to act the way they do.

[Anonymous]

Parties are fun you drink and meet new people better than sitting at home watching tv.

[Asker]

like I said I would love to meet new people, but knowing how cliquey people still are, and unnecessarily shallow, it sounds (and feels) like people aren't open to change or something new.

[djhohrath]

your a judgmental prick

[Asker]

I just explained why I'm not.

[djhohrath]

Not really, I think your contradicting yourself by saying your not judgmental because you just wrote a short novel about how you can't comprehend that people choose to spend their time partying and not something else. You even acknowledge the fact that partying is fun but still hate on people for doing it, your talking sh*t and trying to make it look like your not. Not everyone is a boring a**hole nothin you can do about it...

[Asker]

I said I had a problem with substance abuse, and superficiality. not partying itself. its just some people take things too far.

[Anonymous]

because they see it being cool and glorified on tv

[Asker]

i would agree with that. the majority of these people tend to be obsessed with jersey shore and reality shows of that sort as well. also hit music radio stations only play sexualized dance music now so that probably doesn't help either.

[cyrus7]

meh, they'll grow up eventually

[Asker]

this is my hope.

[taster]

Heh Heh..don't count on it...I am 54! not my Down Arrow..I will give you your first Up Arrow..

[Asker]

and taster, this is my fear.

[olylowlife]

It's looked upon as the cool thing to do.