Why does everyone care so much about looks?

Question

I like a guy...he's not gorgeous, but I really like him, he's sweet to me, makes me things, sends me random texts, his voice is definitely hot, but still my friends judge him like a contestant for a modeling company! It makes me feel so bad, like I am putting him in the line of fire called my friends... I am too afraid to evn have them on the same wave length because I don't want them to hurt him...

Why are guys and girls so judgmental on appearance...isn't a decent looking guy with a sweet persoality enough? I mean..he makes me feel so special and always calls me beautiful, does society just not care about genuinely nice people anymore?

Reckoning · Accepted Answer

"does society just not care about genuinely nice people anymore?"

Feels that way a lot of the time doesn't it. But you know, the only way that could ever be changed is if people like you go with their hearts and ignore those people that are so shallow. As a person's personality shines through, they become more attractive to me physically anyway. There can be the hottest guy in the world in front of me, but if his personality isn't a good one then he becomes unnattractive to me very quickly. I would much rather have an averagely good looking man with a sweet personality than a stereotypical drop dead gorgeous bloke with a rubbish personality.

Personality lasts, looks don't last as long. So to those people basing their lives on appearance of their partners, they will be rather unsatisfied in life.

Ignore your friends, they probably have not matured enough to realize what is involved in a REAL relationship and are focusing purely on looks. If you like the guy, go for him, I bet your friends will soon realize because of their shallow views they are missing out on something really rather special :)

deathnote · Accepted Answer

People may seem shallow but subconsciously they're actually thinking about their future offspring, how they will look. They want cute babies with nice features. Even if you are open minded, something inside you will kinda judge (or anyone) on their looks, everyone does it really! But honestly I wouldn't mind compromising if he has a good personality, after all, personality is so attractive because THIS person will also be the father of your children, and you want someone who will set a good example (an of course someone to make you happy!). I know its a cruel world, that will never change. Wish more people were like you ! I try to be :p

peace-love-couture · Accepted Answer

Your friends suck, no offense.

Look, I have superficial friends who will openly admit that looks are important, but they aren't judgmental to the boyfriends we have. Unless they have a real reason to judge, like he's mean or cheated or whatever, they don't. Reevaluate who your friends are chica.

MrOracle · Accepted Answer

Clearly, you are much more mature than your shallow friend are, and have figured out what's really important. Good for you.

So, you need to tell your friends to STFU. They can think what they want, but tell them you don't care to hear their opinions on this matter.

Remember this always: a lot of women can't stand to see other women (who they view as "competition") happy, and if one of their friends finds happiness, they set out to destroy it with ant-like industry. They want you to be at least as miserable, if not more, than they are.

Don't buy into that crap. Realize that it's their own insecurity talking, and feel sorry for them that they can't (or won't) do what they KNOW is right. And be happy that YOU did.

Frostie · Accepted Answer

Eh, I judge for myself, I don't let my friends do my judging. I personally need physical attraction as much as a girl with a personality. What my friends think about her, doesn't really mean much to me, as they aren't dating her, I am. So they can suck it up, or f*** off. I've had to tell a friend to f off with his sh*t at one point in time. He knocked it off. Either way, just cause they wouldn't sleep/date him, doesn't mean you shouldn't. don't worry about other peoples' opinions on who you date.

Lol, everyone is supposed to be "nice". That is expected, social norms call for more than just being a respectful person. "Bad Boys" come into play in this scenario. either way, I think my answer is clear enough.

Joshbgosh · Answer

I can't stand one of my friend's girlfriend. I say (to myself, not to him) that she is ugly, but she is even uglier on the inside, truly not a good person, he just doesn't want to die alone.

But onto your situation, I don't want to sound like a douche, but your friends sounds terrible. This guy sounds great and it sounds like he make you feel head over heels and gives you confidence, yet they can't be happy for you and shut up? That's awful. I don't think you need to protect him, I think he'll do just fine on his own if they make hurtful comments. If he's witty, then definitely don't protect him because if they say something rude, I'm sure he'll have the last laugh.

TouchTheSky · Answer

Yes, that's so wrong lol, really, yesterday I was at Facebook, with my friend, on his profile, he's not that good looking but he's average, I talked with a girl like it's him... And girl acts like an idiot.

And the same night, I logged with my account and talk with her, she was nice to me of course I end up dump her..., Because I hate this kind of people. They only care for look.

arashmenalagha · Answer

Excellent question, and I like your name! wow I like you already :)

I think people are now conditioned to think that appearance is almost everything. and they forget what is truly important. but there is good news. You don't, and I'm so proud of you :)!

(I know some people might comment saying this is not true, but you know it's true... you can't lie to yourself.)

malekoniky · Answer

DO not protect the guy. Support but don't protect him. He is a guy. If he is a normal guy with normal male confidence he does not even notice. I care.

sovetskii13 · Answer

Because the way you look is the first think a person notices about you. A persons first impression of you is based on how you look. If you look bad, they won't want to get to know you personally (in most cases).

yopyopyop · Answer

Well sadly, your friends are idiots. They are behaving like 12 year old bullies. If you like him, just go for him, and live happily.

Guysensei · Answer

look, your friends are just jealous and hating cause he makes you happy. they don't want you to have a good thing if they dont

pr3ttybr0wn · Answer

in all likelihood, your guy's friends are judging you the same way

GymStatus · Answer

I knew a female that only wanted me because of looks. She always slammed the not so good looking or average guys... We don't talk anymore. That is life lol. She was very attractive...

Anonymous · Answer

Every one cares about looks because in society it's mostly about looks and your appearance but it's also your life. You live it the way you want to and if you found a guy that treats you right, then just ignore what anybody else thinks or says. Just be happy and if they were really your friends, they would be happy that you found somebody that makes you really happy and is nice to you.

asianfreak · Answer

perhaps that's one way everyone judges each other nowadays.

Why does everyone care so much about looks?

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