Why are guys so thoughtless and selfish?

sometimes, it seems like they can't even see past themselves to realize that they are hurting other people. Like honestly you didn't even think that maybe just maybe I would like to cum? Or maybe you shouldn't tell me how hot my friends are when I show you pics of me and my friends? I'll never understand some people. Its just frustrating and hurtful. Any ideas to stop caring about this person?


Most Helpful Guy

  • They're not. You just haven't met the right ones like me. I'd treat you right and with respect and consider you thoughts and feelings and never leave you out of the picture. I'd make you feel special and show you that I care. I'll remember the little things you say and surprise you with them so that you'll even be more happier. You'd be my priority. All I want you is to be happy so I'll do everything possible to make you happy. I'll do the best I can for you. But hey, that's just me.


What Guys Said 24

  • All guys are NOT thoughtless and selfish...



    ...the ones YOU pick (and yes, I said PICK) are thoughtless and selfish.

    Take a break from dating, and try to figure out the "common threads" (looks as well as personality) between these guys that you CHOSE (you could've simply picked another guy, you know)...


    ...then once you figure out what traits lead to the negative actions of the previous guys you're complaining about, then you'll make better choices.

    P.S. If you don't do this out of stubborness (or some other reason), then you're gonna get the same results over and over again.

  • Look, I'm sure you're pretty pissed off right now, but honestly, not all guys are like this. Some are kinda stupid and immature and don't realize that this might hurt your feelings. In those cases my suggestion is (for dating and friendships) to tell them how you feel, tell them off, or (if you're dating them) dump them, and in cases of this just being some guy you know, just disassociate yourself from them

    Not all guys are all selfish and thoughtless. Hell, some of my answers on here, and you'd know at least I'm not. I've put in a lot of effort in my relationship. I'd put in a lot of effort into making my girlfriend happy, in and out of the bedroom. More than that, I know I'm not the only guy like me. So good guys are out there. You just have to keep trying.

    Also, on the flipside of things, women can be cruel, manipulative, findfucking, lying, cheating, sluts. So all in all, I think the lesson you should take from this is that there are a lot of crappy people out there. Male and female. You just need to deal with it as it comes, deal with crappy people in your life as best you can, and if you can't, then toss them out and find new and better friends and lovers.

    Anyway, I'm sorry you've had such bad luck. I hope whatever you do, you'll have better luck with guys in the future.

    Good luck.

  • Boys will be boys. A lot of guys are like that, sadly. Let me know if you find out though.. I've come to the point where I just want to give up on people altogether, you just end up expecting too much and set yourslef up for disappointment every single f-ing time.

  • girls can be like this too... while talking about kinky things with my ex, while her and I were dating, she told me she wants to be f***ed by two guys at the same time... didn't say anything about me in there either, took her half a minute to realize why I wasn't saying anything.

  • Suddenly all men are pigs, selfish, rude, rotten. Nice...

    I get it you were treated piss poorly by a piss poor excuse for a man. But trust me when I say we're not like that at all.

    This guy is a creep get rid of the schmuck.

    I would also tell this guy how you really feel, before you tell him off.

  • Maybe the problem isn't "guys" being thoughless and selfish, but that the "guy" (singular) that YOU are dating is a douche?

    Just a thought.

  • You want to know the best part? The marketplace is huge and you can dump this guy and find another one as soon as you want. There's no reason to settle if you're not happy with your choice.


  • This guy sounds like he has an ego and maybe he think he's entitled to you. If this is true, he shames men everywhere. It disgusts me. Dump this guy and find a "nice" guy.They "finish" last...in bed and it would give you a breath of fresh air.

  • That's not me, I'll hold back so the girl cums first. Dump this dude if he is being selfish.

  • Were not all the same. Its just that most of the guys that girls go for are the outgoing, talkative and entertaining types. They are this way outwardly and this makes them attractive. Their attractiveness is probably known to them, so they act like the way a beautiful, arrogant, girl would. Its weird because a lot of guys I know are very into themselves. Love their looks and think theyre the sh*t. Its just that the caring, nice guys get f***ed. We get shafted and pushed to the back of the scenes by these a**holes you're talking about. Girls are attracted, naturally, to the big buck so you go for them then when they can't please you emotionally you call ALL of us a**holes. You should probably go think about yourself, who you are and why you get into these bad situations. Try the nice guy out, youd probably be unsuspecting of how easy we can sweep you off your feet. The problem is that girls like you will continue to look for things in all the wrong places...then you will bitch about it.

    • Well he doesn't think he is good looking he is actually really self conscious. Its just I think that he doesn't like me as much as I like him and so there is a power difference. I usually try to avoid those a**hole types and go for guys that others may not find attractive but I find him attractive and there a**holes too. I mean he isn't a player, he is down to earth. I don't know I just think he doesn't appreciate me or care and its hurtful

    • Something I discovered in the last weekend- in the end there is only you and everyone else. Don't try to find your happiness in someone else because most people are self centered and will bring you only problems. Find, but don't look, for someone who appreciates you. That's all that matters, having someone that you respect as well as respects you.

  • umm... not ALL of us are like that.. :P

  • Ye we all are toughtless and selfish. Or maybe? It is just him.

    Stop caring about people you can't have. If he is not looking at you in that way then it is not likely to change, just as guys get friendzoned, so do girls.

    • The first sentence I agree with. The rest, not so much. I got the impression she was talking about her boyfriend, or a FWB she's with.

  • Not all guys are like that. Just like not all girls are materialistic.

  • not guys but some guys...

  • It's not our gender's fault you picked this guy

    • Damn, lol.

    • Show All
    • Thats true maybe it's something about me that makes this happen because its not the first time.

    • this guy is stark with his response, but he's absolutely right.

      Females get "the final say" when it comes to ANY "action" happening in a relationship.

      Frankly, unless he raped you or sexually assaulted you...


      ...no matter what he did, you PICKED him, and you're suffering the consequences of having "choosing power".

      Now you're probably thinking that "arranged" relationships are better, because at least you have merit to deflect the blame of your bad choices on someone else.

  • But why are you grouping all guys together though?

  • Quit generalizing and maybe you'll get some decent answers.

  • They are not alllll bad-just check this link out and maybe you will change your mind on men link

  • He is just one guy out of a whole world of guys...

  • there are selfish people everywhere nowadays.

  • I think girls choose what kind of guys they want to be with. That sweet geeky guy you brushed off, well that was your choice. You chose to be with this kind of guy so why blame all men?

  • not all of them

  • It's not guys. It's people in general. You just don't give girls the same opportunity to hurt you.


What Girls Said 3

  • It seems as though they are.. It just changes shape and type from guy to guy.

  • Get angry. Or keep your mind busy.

  • guys that are still playing the field and haven't found the one they want to settle down with act like this. basically if you're not wife material when he decides he wants a wifey to commit to, then you're something to be played. I don't think they think of us as people with feelings when they're in this stage of life. Time is what will get someone out of your mind if you've fallen for them, but you can also help this by trying to remain busy (friends, work, etc) and cutting him off. don't keep the lines of communication between you and him open, allow yourself to heal and not continue to be mindf***ed. think about the ways this guy didn't deserve you and how unworthy he is of your feelings. and try to learn from this experience so you can avoid falling into the trap of a guy like this in the future.