I grew up with my parents fighting all the time, telling me that my problems weren´t important, my mother would compare me to other girls my age and tell me they were better than me and that I should change. She also told me and everyone she could that I was likely to be an old maid because no guy would ever like me.
Needless to say I grew up feeling ugly, shy, afraid of meeting new people and thinking that I was unattractive.
I want to make it clear that the only people who said this things to me were my parents, other people in my life (friends and even random people) tell me I´m beautiful and that I have a very sweet, nice personality. However, the words my parents said are stuck in my head.
I only want affection from someone else, someone to hold, someone to hold hands with, someone to cuddle at night, even someone to have sex with. The problem is that I can´t even open up to the idea of meeting a guy. Whenever I have the chance to meet someone, I get instantly very shy (which I´m not) and I can´t even look at him directly in the eyes let alone flirt.
How can I open up?!
Please be kind, I already have to deal my family...
Needless to say I grew up feeling ugly, shy, afraid of meeting new people and thinking that I was unattractive.
I want to make it clear that the only people who said this things to me were my parents, other people in my life (friends and even random people) tell me I´m beautiful and that I have a very sweet, nice personality. However, the words my parents said are stuck in my head.
I only want affection from someone else, someone to hold, someone to hold hands with, someone to cuddle at night, even someone to have sex with. The problem is that I can´t even open up to the idea of meeting a guy. Whenever I have the chance to meet someone, I get instantly very shy (which I´m not) and I can´t even look at him directly in the eyes let alone flirt.
How can I open up?!
Please be kind, I already have to deal my family...
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