so. first things first. I just know I'm stubborn and can overreact. but I believe in this case I didn't overreact. I did what was needed to be done. so my boyfriend at the time is an amazing person. super sweet. but didn't fit my lifestyle. ( families were grown up differently etc.) well he's nice to me 98% of the time. but he has a terrible temper. which I understand he's a guy. but recently he's been telling me I'm stupid an idiot and once he told me to shut the f*** up in public. when he said that I told him if he ever talked to me like that again I would leave him and I'm not a random girl he can talk to like that. so he apologized a thousand times. and all this stuff. then one night I told him I would come over later that night. I ended up falling asleep. (super busy with work and family) and I woke up at 10 and texted him sorry baby. I fell asleep. and he wrote back to me. "OK bitch your a liar etc" as soon as I read those words I was done trying in our relationship. did I overreact? I am not taking him back at all I've given him so many chances. these weren't the only times he was emotionally abusive to me either. but I just want to know how many girls out there have been treated this way and how many guys have done that and why did you do it?
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Personally, I've rarely been mad enough to call any woman that, (in the heat of the moment in traffic, some woman I don't know, I've used the word, I'm sure, but otherwise, no), and certainly not a girlfriend. I had a girlfriend who admitted to being one to me; she used the words, I never did. Nor did I really think of her as one - she was nasty a lot of the time, and out of control many times; but I haven't thought of a girlfriend as that; not even a girl who rejected me in a nasty way.
If you don't want to be talked to in that way, and that's a deal breaker, then it's a deal breaker. In my impression you had every right to let him know where the line should be drawn; personally, cussing me out like that would be a deal breaker. I certainly don't want to be at a position in life where I'd talk to a future girlfriend or wife in that way, and I hope I never become someone who talks to his love like that.
What would also be a deal breaker for me is if a girlfriend were to accuse me of being a liar, right off the cuff, without any proof. That'd be too much distrust; trust needs to be a priority in a healthy relationship.
So if you don't want someone who will talk to you like that, then just know that there are guys out there who won't talk to you like that. Nor should you be expected that it's "acceptable." They may be rarer, and you may have to broaden the scope of who you'd date to get them (I don't mean "settling"), but they do exist, and I'm sure there is someone out there who can control how he treats people in a healthier way.