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Girlfriend smokes weed behind my back.

So, I've been dating my girlfriend for approx. 2 years now. Before we met, she went through some "dark days" (her words, not mine). She would smoke... Show More

Most Helpful Opinion

  • It doesn't sound harsh at all. I would tell her straight out that you are aware that she is smoking again and that you are not going to be around if this is what she chooses to do. Not only that but it's against the law and it puts you in a bad position with your job. Don't feel bad about what you are saying because it's completely legitimate.

What Girls Said 5

  • ... I'm in the same predicament as you - however, with more of a serious drug, MDMA. I've told my boyfriend "I'm not going to stop him from experimenting, but I will leave you if you get past my comfort zone. It not that I don't love you, and it's not that I don't want to fight for you. I just see it as a lose lose situation, that will only go down hill." He didn't fight with me, he didn't try to defend himself or explain it's an occasional thing, you on the other hand might have a difficult position with majority of the world becoming more accepting to legalizing marijuana... There is a large possibility that is could possibly be legalized world wide by 2020. So stand your ground and say even if it was to become legalized I wouldn't appreciate you doing it.

  • You should tell her. Especially since you're a police officer in training. She should understand where you're coming from. And if she's willing to throw away two years of a relationship for weed, then it's her loss. Not yours. Especially if she's not going to come right out and tell you that she's doing it. Trust me, you don't want to be a part of that...

  • talk about it.

    listen to her side and let your side be known as well.

    dont step your foot out and say DONT SMOKE WEED out of nowhere

    that will just push her away more

    and maybe she'll do MORE things behind your back

    so the best is just to talk about it

    and see what you guys can do about it.

  • Tell her how you feel. She is going to make the choice on her own, just let her know that if she chooses the weed she is choosing it over you. I wouldn't be a part of her life either. Especially where you are going to be a cop, that will make a mess for you. But I don't want drugs in my house or around my family. I wouldn't stay with someone who did it.

What Guys Said 9

  • So much for the legend pretending that weed isn't habit forming/addictive...

    I'd never have started anything with her.

  • I would honestly leave.

    As far as long term compatibility goes,
    substance dependency is something that really does matter.

    Some differences are irreconcilable.

  • leave her. you'll think she stopped but shell just be doing it behind your back .

  • I have nothing against weed even though I do not smoke it. All you can do as a boyfriend is voice your opinion and exercise your faith and trust in her, she's obviously trying. Let things play out!

  • You should probably just leave her. If she's the type to be doing things behind your back that's probably not going to change.

    If you really want to stay together, you can give her another chance, but make it all clear and let her know the stakes. No couple will have a good relationship when they're hiding things from each other and lying to each other.

  • It don't matter if she smokes weed, it's way healthier than cigarettes and makes people chill. If you can't accept your girl because she smokes bud then you don't deserve her.

  • your gay. weed is great and she can smoke and be with you at the same time. grow up and let her smoke, if you do like her you'll deal with it

  • So youve been dating a girl for two years and do not trust her to make her own decisions? are you afraid of her becoming a different person? is your relationship worth jeopardizing because you hold different beliefs on this topic? would she understand if you did something that she was not a huge fan of either? do you think the relationship has developed as far as it is going to/ as far as you would otherwise like it to? Are there other fish in the sea, and is that a factor in your decision? think it out, be open with yourself and her.

    i say give it time, I mean if she becomes a crackfiend overnight and things are not working out then brake up, but if things besides this are going smooth, then you're problem is not too huge and I would say wait and see...(hope to help! :)

  • Tell her how you feel. It is her choice to decide whether or not she would rather have the weed or you. Lay it out.

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