You're just an old c---y jealous b---h! Don't get mad because you're old.
Good morning, good afternoon, or good evening, and welcome to the internet everybody! This was an actual comment along with a string of nasty others that I received about a pretty innocuous post awhile back. I wasn't even talking to the person who posted her response to a conversation I was having with another GaGer, and well, it's about a year later, and she has long ago been removed from the likes of GaG I assume for what I'm sure were her other equally wholesome thoughts directed towards others.
Everyone who's ever spent an hour on the internet know of, or has experienced comments like these. You're rolling along and then bam! You see it, and you think, who raised you or who hurt you that this is how you start a conversation with someone you don't even know? I think back on it now of course, and I'm like, why did I even respond to this individual in any way because I knew what would happen if I did.
In our everyday lives, we all have an instinct to defend ourselves in those moments because we know we aren't those things that haters and trolls like to say we are. We want to stick up for ourselves and win the war against the unseen stranger. Sometimes we fight back, we start the flame war, we engage until we are internet black and blue, but it always ends the same way with nothing changing. The next day, there will be someone else, some new threat, some new comment. If this is almost an everyday battle for you, you probably should learn to handle these persons or comments in a few ways.
One: first and foremost, your haters are people that don't even know you.
How can these haters and trolls be a fair and impartial judge on your character if they've never even met with more than a few sentences out of your mouth?
Someone who doesn't know you can't tell you who you are and what you're about. This person wants to just start drama and pick fights rather then give you any honest feedback on what you're saying or your character because they have no clue who that is because they don't even know you. So why let someone who doesn't know s--t about you, piss you off?
Two: know that hate is usually not even about you.
There isn't an ounce of sarcasm in me when I say this: these haters are often angry at the world for their life situation, depressed, or dealing with something in their own lives like a divorcing parent or crushing debt or a crappy love life, so the way they cope is to lash out at anyone and anything around them. Within the confines of the internet they can do it often with no repercussions so innocent people often become unwilling targets.
Three: do not engage.
You lend power to your haters, when you engage. They need you to complete their vicious cycle. When you don't respond or fight back, don't think about it as you giving up or giving in. Think of the first two ways of handling hate--it's not about you and they are dealing with their own demons. They want to fight against themselves, but can't, so you become their play things like a cat pawing at a rat. This isn't like real life, where there may be some merit to confrontation. This is a person whom you'll never meet, don't know who they are, what they are going through or why they are doing it, just that they've done it.
Four: block the negativity out of your life
You don't need to spend precious time out of your day "handling" internet fights and responding negatively in return. How much time are you wasting doing that? I mean seriously, having a 20 minute internet fight is the biggest waste of your life. Use your time on social media or elsewhere to put into the world the positivity that you want to get back. Ever heard the phrase, "someone's got to be the bigger person in the situation." That's you, and you have to allow yourself the opportunity to be that bigger person by not becoming part of the problem or resorting to pettiness and immature behavior because some rando made you mad. I personally don't want to be that person who thinks she needs to 'get back at' everyone who has ever said a mean word about me, but doesn't know the first thing about me like my name. Delete. Block. Ignore. Move on.