Opinions on virginity? Does it really matter?

I know it's a little personal, but if you don't mind sharing what age did you lose your virginity? I am a female and 20 years old, I still haven't.

I often hear the "the time will come" but I have had personal unpleasant experiences and therefore struggle to trust someone enough. And now I'm getting to the point where it's highly embarrassing!


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I'm almost 24 and never been on a date or kissed a girl. I couldn't get any girls to like me as anything more than an in-school friend. I felt depressed at times when seeing, hearing, and reading how so many others my age already went all the way (or almost) while I haven't even stepped up to the plate. When I turned 21 I decided to just give up and forget about it. I don't even want a girl anymore. I can live without sex, love, or a kiss. I actually feel happier now that I never think negatively about where I stand.
    Anyway, that's just my story. It's not a suggestion for you to give up on finding love. Just because it worked positively for me doesn't mean it will be good for you.

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What Guys Said 6

  • I was deadly afraid of getting my gf pregnant. I was totally satisfied with oral for many years. Me and my wife were virgins together. I was 25 and she was 20 when we had sex for the first time. We dated for two years before we had sex, but we lots of fun in the meantime.

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  • Why do you feel the need to disclose such information? Its simple and easy enough to say you dont want to put out.

    IF and WHEN you do feel comfortable enough to venture forth with significant other, chances are, he will be ok with you telling him its your first time, otherwise yeah, dont tell people?

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    • It's easy to post and ask questions about it anonymously like anything! But when I speak to a guy and they start talking about having sex (like every guy does at some point) I never know whether to agree or tell them there and then!

  • Why do you think you need to lose it because your 20? I'm from the uk as well and i did not lose it until I was your age, and once I done it that was it! Nothing!
    Because your worried wait till your in a nice relationship with a guy don't just settle for a drunk guy on a night out.:)

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  • Oh god i'm 46 and oldest virgin here, never made it to
    the base of actual sex

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  • 17 and still haven't due to lack of opportunity,

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  • 24 and I still haven't. By choice as well. When the girl is right, that's when, and not a moment sooner. I'm not waiting till marriage or anything, but fuck this hooking up with almost complete strangers nonsense. That's way too impersonal for me.

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    • That's good to know. It's just this trust thing that is stopping me from being with someone. 😔

    • Trust takes time. There will be guys that will give you that time you need because they'll see you are worth it. You just have to keep open to the possibility is all.

What Girls Said 5

  • Opinions on virginity?
    That for gals it's an overrated notion used to measure a gal's worth and respect as a human being and partner. For guys there's issues however it's a guys world in my opinion so those issues are a wash to me.

    Does it really matter?
    Not in my opinion.

    I know it's a little personal, but if you don't mind sharing what age did you lose your virginity?
    I haven't lost it and nor do I intend to as I'm a heterosexual gal and it seems sex tends to be quite sh*t for gals ala the orgasm gap and then comes risks like rape (which likely won't receive justice due to rape culture), pregnancy, STIs, and STDs.

    "And now I'm getting to the point where it's highly embarrassing!"
    Perhaps it's suited to evaluate or reevaluate why you think it's embarrassing at all to be a virgin at your age. The reasoning is probably flawed thus could mean you'd logically see there's no to little reason to be embarrassed.

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  • I was 16. At my age now, I realize I was a little young. However, I do not regret it since I am still in a relationship with the guy I lost it to. We've been together for five years.

    You shouldn't be embarrassed though. There's absolutely nothing wrong with being a virgin at 20. You have plenty of time to lose it. Only do it when you feel ready and find a guy you really trust. Never feel pressured into doing anything. Being a virgin or not being a virgin does not matter nearly as much as society wants you to believe.

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  • I was 15 when I lost my virginity. There's nothing wrong with being a virgin at 20, there's nothing wrong with being a virgin at 40! When you're ready you'll find someone who makes you forget about all those unpleasant experiences- you'll suddenly feel ready and it'll feel right and it'll happen.

    You shouldn't feel ashamed for being a virgin. There's nothing shameful about it! It doesn't matter when other people lost their virginity, everyone is different :)

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  • I lost mine at 18. I don't think virginity matters, all in all. It's a personal thing. Just do what you're comfortable with. No need to be embarrassed. Just don't tell people; after all no one else needs to know - virgin or not.

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  • It's not a big deal just wait a few more years until you're with someone you love and trust. I waited till I was 17. I somewhat regret it but I was glad it was with someone I really loved

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