Guys: Am I too fat to be concidered as attractive? *pics*

I'm really insecure about my body and weight at the moment... my bf told me I'm too fat. I'm trying to lose weight coz think I'm really fat & disgusting. I'd just like to know guys honest opinions? Could be attracted to a girl at my size? Date? (if everything else was as you liked, her face & personality & style etc)

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I would never say you was fat if I was your bf that's horrible !
    But i would make your body my personal project and get you looking and feeling great about yourself:)

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    • That was really sweet of you! :) I have asked my bf to help me with losing the weight coz he works out a lot but he just said he don't wanna take me to the gym bc his mates would think less of him that he has a fat gf :( But I'm still gonna transform myself for better :)

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    • Thanks again! I'll start doing it :)

    • Nice, this is what I do and I will keep to this routine for the rest of my life, I don't need scales my mirror tells me how I'm doing, make sure you don't lose heart if your exercising and not losing weight,.
      muscle weighs more than fat and you might be losing fat and gaining muscle , that's why I don't weigh myself and look in the mirror instead, I have. A much better I dead of where I am:)

What Guys Said 22

  • Well, first some better underwear would help. ;-)

    Yes, you could defintely lose about 20-25lbs and likely have a nice body. Lose 30-35 and have a rocking body. Your curves are there but a little overtaken.

    You need a BF that will support your journey and work out with you and encourage you - not put you down for where you are at the moment. That probably depresses you and makes you eat more.

    Good luck in your journey and keep up the fight! Best advice - always drink water - zero calories and refreshing (sugar drinks like coke are killing America and diet coke with no calories still tricks the body into treating it like sugar). Avoid fast food. Get more sleep. Find a work out buddy and a partner.

    Good luck and hope you can talk to him and help him change his attitude. He should love you first and second encourage and motivate you in your journey to self improvement - not for him - but for you and your well being!

    Looking forward to the updated bikini pics in 2 months! Go get it!!!

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    • Thanks for the encouragement :) I'll do this!!!

  • no you are not too fat, there is a lot of pressure on people to be skinny these day, especially girls and its all bull. there is nothing wrong with having a extra bit of weight on. Would I date a girl your size? yes I would. its not just about her body, she might have cute eyes or a nice smile and a great personality. If a girl has a great personality then she is dateable. Im not saying looks don't matter but I think personality it the most important thing. Please don't think you that you are fat or disgusting, If your boyfriend can't accept you for who you are then why be with him. However if you can't love yourself how can you expect someone else to love you. Make peace with your self so you can feel good about yourself, I hope this helped

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    • Thanks :) This was helpful!

  • Ok, how to not hurt feelings. You are a bigger girl, SO WHAT. What is your personality like? Are you cute? Do you kick puppies and kittens? You determine who you are and go from there. Not everyone will judge you for your body. Some guys do actually see beyond that and look at who you are for who you are. You wanna be self consious? Go right ahead. You obviously put those pic on here to be judged. You need to judge yourself. You are not 400 pounds, and I bet you are fairly cute, but can't say for sure. If you are insecure/concerned about your weight, do something about it. If not, leave it and find a guy that is ok with it. You are fine the way you are, as long as you are loving and honest. Anything other than that, and I would be disappointed. Get out there and fall in love dammit.

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    • That was very helpful, thank you!! :) I could lose weight, just haven't had what it takes atm. So much going on in my life. I know I'm a good person and many guys say I'm cute. On good days I like myself but then I feel that most people judge me by my size.

  • You've still got some shape;the waist appears to be less than your hip size.It really should be less than 85% of your hip measurement.
    You're obviously carrying too much weight and you know it.You might just get away with it if you've got a pretty face, but it's time to take some action and get fit.I think you should aim at losing 50 lbs.

    Still be prepared to date someone if they like you.If they like you, they will accept you as you are and you needn't be embarrassed.They could even give you positive encouragement to get back in condition, and not negative criticism.

    It's time to give up the junk food and soft drinks.Fresh fruit and vegetables are more what you need, and some exercise.

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    • Thanks for your opinion! I guess I should consider dropping some pounds.

  • Different guys like different types, shapes, colors, etc. of women. You'll find people who think you're hot and sexy the way you are. If you change anything about yourself it should be cause you want to and not cause of what someone else says.

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    • Thanks! I know guys are different. I'm just wondering what people generally would think about my size.. and I'll change myself because of me when I decide to do that :)

    • Well said from both sides, nicely said Yogue7.

  • If he meant it in a loving and encouraging way, then I support his view. But if he was a dick about it, then that's not nice.

    I wouldn't date someone with that much weight unless they where already in the process of losing it, but i wouldn't find it attractive initially.

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  • Get a new bf i see nothing wrong with you just curvy
    all my ex-girlfriends were overweight 180-240 lbs
    but i did love them at one time

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  • If I liked, her face & personality & style etc I would date and be attracted to a girl like that. I still think you're kinda fat. If you want to loose weight, loose it for yourself not some one else. do it for your happiness. You are by means disgusting looking

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  • No! Your boyfriend is a loser. You look pretty cute to me! Modern perceptions of beauty are ridiculous. The funny thing is, historically and in other parts of the world, women with a little extra weight have been and still are considered more pretty than super skinny girls. You look fine, and really and truly, you're not fat. You are normal, like thousands of others.

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    • Thank you, that was kind of you. I still think I'm pretty fat..

    • Don't get too down about it. Just don't completely let yourself go, either. You are a pretty girl.

  • Your boyfriend is an ass you look just fine too me

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  • Lol as much as an asshole your BF might being for pointing it out, he's correct. You do look fat =\

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  • My first and honest thought was, that dress! o.O
    Your body shape is fine, but i think this dress is not very flattering on your frame at all.

    I'm not a stylist or anything so can't say much. :P
    But as far as your body is concerned it's fine, unless you're very short.

    But if you're still insecure about your body, you could work out or lose a few pounds (like 5-10, not sure about weights).

    But my first advice would be to choose clothing that suits your frame, cause they can make a huge difference to your confidence. Like one female member has mentioned - 'apple shape'.
    Ask close friends, (family, casual friends and SO might not be completely honest) about what styles look good on you; and only then if you still feel insecure should you try to change your body by working out, toning your shape or losing weight.

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    • Thanks a lot! :)
      I'm 5'6" tall. I'm gonna buy better clothes to begin with :)

  • :) :)
    Yes Miss, you are fat.TBH my fingers are shaking after I saw your Pic.I think you are Hot in an unexplainable way.

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  • great bf you have there

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  • At your height, 50 lbs.

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  • Yes you are too fat.

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  • Shooting for a healthy range, 120 would be a good number.

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  • To be honest your bf is right you are fat.

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  • yeah, 50 lbs would be a good amount of weight to loose.

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  • you need to lose weight. you said be honest.

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    • Lol, that's why I'm asking here. :) How much should I loose in your opinion?

    • I don't know maybe 100 pounds.

      just kidding. I'm not good at judging weight and weight loss. I wouldn't worry about what the scale says, just how you look.

    • Hahah. That's my problem though, I don't really know if and when I look good. I think I have some body image issues or something. I have been 40 pounds lighter, and I remember thinking back then that I was fat. Now I just don't see myself that much bigger but I guess I'm just blind or something. Only when I look at pictures of me I'm shocked...

  • @ 5'2" you should not weigh more than 125 and that is on the high end

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    • okay

    • Get a scale to track progress but more importantly get a tape measure and keep track of your measurements. Watching both should keep you motivated.

    • okay that's good i guess, thanks

  • I can only speak to my preference but honest? Absolute turn off. I know guys that are attracted to women your size, but I'm not one of them. I find obesity to create a very gender neutral look, where you see very little of either gender showing through because the weight masks all the skeletal differences between men and women. It really turns me off.

    Good luck on your weight loss. Not just for attraction purposes, but for your health as well. Excess weight like that doesn't simply cut years off your life but it will absolutely degrade the quality of your life in a variety of ways.

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What Girls Said 13

  • Why is your boyfriend trying to lower your self esteem?
    Did you gain weight while in a relationship with him?
    Or were you always that way?
    Although I don't agree with his choice of words, if you were thinner when you met him
    I can understand why he feels that way.
    You physically are not the same girl he fell in love with.

    He should be by yourself supporting you to lose weight.
    Not criticizing you.
    To be honest, he sounds like a real jerk!

    I don't think you are disgusting.
    Can you improve your body?
    Yes, we all can no matter how perfect some of us may appear.

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    • ***Correction: He should be by your side supporting you

    • I have gained 5 pounds (we have been together for 1 year), but I wasn't slim when we started dating. He has said many times he wishes I'd be skinnier, and I have tried to work out and eat right all the time, but it's not going well coz I have some problems with eating. Sometimes I binge and throw up, and lately I've been doing that more and gained those 5 pounds. Now he said I'm too fat.

    • This all sounds like verbal abuse.
      You can do so much better!

  • Firstly you're boyfriend was wrong to say you're too fat. Too fat is individual to us and not for anyone else to decide. So he's being a douche there he could have easily just supported your endeavor to lose weight.

    Secondly yes you could lose a few pounds heck so could I. There's a lot of people who could afford to lose a few extra but don't let it consume you. Remember dieting is a simple process but in no way is it easy. Just start exercising more and eating at a deficit, it will be a long hard process but if you want to lose weight go for it. But be safe and do it for the right reasons.

    Thirdly of course you can be loved at that size; people four times your size have found love. There's people who are exclusively attracted to bigger women. So don't worry about that. Personally I think you look fine and if you have a heart as big as your insecurities any guy would be lucky to have you.

    Good luck <3

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    • Thanks for your reply! It was really helpful :)

    • I'm glad and I saw on another response that you binge and purge this can become uncontrollable if not dealt with early on. I recommend you speak to a doctor and he can probably get you in contact with a professional who can help you deal with this and help you diet healthier.

    • Thanks, I know its not normal, think of talking someone! :)

  • you're not too fat but you "are" fat.

    personality is related to looks. and being overweight shows a man or a woman's lack of self respect, laziness, lack of self consciousness and will power and is not natural. try to understand your flaws and how to fight them. fight them and fix them.
    have a little self respect for yourself girl. why should you be in a shape that someone even "dare" to call you with names and hurt you? Self respect should be your law and trying to be "good" for "yourself". don't lose weight because of what a dumbass said but because of "yourself".
    remember this and act and you'll be good in no time.

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  • I don't think you have a bad body, but you have broad shoulders, and you should dress for the "apple" shape.

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    • Yep, I've always been broad, even when skinnier. And I look like apple :D I should buy new clothes, have just felt like hiding my body lately...

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    • Hahaha, wish I had your attitude! :) And I've always thought it's sexy and feminine when you have a pear shape!! And big boobs, bet many guys like that too ;) Not that we should care too much about what they think of our bodies, just saying.

    • Eh I'm deff a little too plump for some dudes, but, at least I'm plump in the right places (to me anyway)

  • yes you need to lose weight imo.. personally if i'm confused if i need to lose weight or not, i just look at my arms...

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    • Ok, thanks too :)

    • you're welcome :).. actually not only when i need to lose weight, if my arms gets too thin i know i need to gain some weight. if one has a curvy figure i understand it can be confusing cause the curves can give the illusion of an ok figure.

  • I would agree with 50lbs.

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  • Your body seems fine. Just get rid of the that dress.

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    • Lol, yeah it's not flattering, know that. Thanks :)

  • I can't see the pic
    Plus if you think you're big, work on it
    I see heavier girls with pretty faces

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  • Beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder...if a person feels you are too "fat" and you are starting to question yourself than he is not for you..a person will love you because who you are and the confidence you have in yourself. If YOU feel you would like to lose weight for your benefit than go for it but do it because you made that choice not because some goof ball fail to see your beauty. God sees you as beautiful so love life each day in always loving who you are.

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  • You took down your pictures. But it's never ok for your bf to make you feel bad about yourself.

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  • Yeah you are chubby.

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  • Dump the boyfriend. He shouldn't be making you feel so insecure like that.

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  • Your boyfriend is a jerk. You should dump him for making you feel disgusting. Never think like that about yourself!

    I don't think there is anything terribly wrong with you but if you're unhappy try to lose weight and be healthier! Better for you. Good luck!!

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    • I try to feel better about myself, it's just not easy when you think are totally wrong and unattractive... I hope losing weight makes me feel better. Thanks for your opinion :)

    • You are not unattractive! I'm sure you're beautiful now and you'll be even more so when you lose weight, because you will think so too!

      Your bf is a jerk! Respect yourself and dump this tool! Good luck girl!

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