Is this really normal to you? Do you speak to girls IRL like this too?

So, ever since I became a member on here, I've gotten some strange messages from dudes. Some are inappropriate, and some are outright weird in a very "what the actual fuck am I reading" kind of way. I decided to make a collage of some of the messages I've gotten on here. Keep in mind that this is just a handful of the ones I've gotten. I've deleted most of the really aggressive ones since they made me feel bad, and because I didn't want to ever accidentally read them again.
http://oi57.tinypic.com/2prbgw0.jpg
Click on the picture to see it full-sized.
Anyway. I'm aware of the fact that not all guys on GaG are like this. Far from it. And I'm happy for that, because otherwise I wouldn't be here. But I just wanted to ask, does literally anyone think that these things would be normal things to say in a conversation in real life? Or would it be totally normal to even START a conversation with these sentences? Because quite frankly, I get kind of creeped out by some of these messages. A lot of the questions they asked me are not only creepy, but extremely awkward too. I'm just wondering why anyone would even think this is normal. And also, I thought it would be nice to show you guys some of the messages that girls on here receive...

Updates:
Thanks for all the responses guys! :) Truthfully I thought that more people would be like "shut up and take it as a compliment!" but I was pleasantly surprised! Faith in humanity somewhat restored :D

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Most Helpful Girl

What Guys Said 59

  • Of course they wouldn't talk to a real girl that way. They are too chicken shit to talk to women. But the cost/benefit ratio is in their favor. It takes little effort to send these messages. The benefit is if they can get off showing you their dick, or get you to talk dirty.

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  • Hey, where I come from, it's perfectly normal to greet a girl by asking if you can have permission to snip a piece of her hair in order to sniff it for later.

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  • Some of them in this collage are straight out weird. It would definitely be creepy if the first thing somebody sent me was "hey you look very cute, can I see you naked." I wouldn't even know them, and yet they somehow feel like they've built a relationship with me where they think it's normal to ask for naked pictures. So, yeah, I see where you're coming from.

    However, I honestly don't think that all of these messages are that weird. Something like "hey sexy" is a pretty innocent message in my mind. To me, it's nothing more than a friendly greeting.

    Also, I don't find it that much weirder than an underage guy would send such a message vs. someone who's over 18. High School kids on GAG (from my experience) seem to be just as sexually informed and consenting as do older members.

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  • WTF? I don't message too often and when I do it's mostly for help or someone has messaged me in regards to something I had commented on and the few that I've gotten to know. I don't randomly message girls here. I think the idea of not seeing that person in RL or ever having the opportunity to meet them give the safe and ill-conceived idea that it's okay to message girls here on GaG without any decorum and act like a bunch of fucks. Thus creating this result. I wish admin could do something about it other than blocks and reporting but does anything really happen, I don't know because I never hear anything about They say they do but what proof as users do we have that they did what they said they would. It's like voting, nothing gets done (j/k) I actually applaud you @lumos for the collage that's a good way to out these fools. Next time I would think it maybe more effective if you added the actual user names hopefully that will alert other female users as to who the fuck are REAL GaG perverts. Then who knows maybe admin would can actually do something about it.

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    • I don't think I'd be allowed to include their usernames, though.

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    • No, but if I remember correctly, it's against the rules to make questions about specific users because it could potentially be antagonizing, or viewed as cyber bullying. And rightfully so. I'm sure the admins would much prefer it if I directly notified them of these messages instead.

    • @lumos - If you think that will help then do it. I however don't see it as cyber bullying when they messaged you first w/ all that bullshit, but that's just me.

  • I apologize on behalf of males as a gender. I find that in recent history, many men have reverted to a more primal state and willingly deactivated their higher thinking (pre-frontal cortex) except for the parts absolutely necessary to function in society (and not many of those if they live with their parents).

    When talking to one of these men, you have to think of it less as talking to an intellectual, free-thinking, sentient mind, and more like you're talking to a beast who has just enough brain cells to speak a language and sustain themselves (not a hard task when preservation of life is enforced by the government.)

    I'm sorry to be the one to bear this news to you. Fortunately, there are men who aren't like this, but they are severely outnumbered in the mystical world of the internet.

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    • And in the least creepy way possible, I'd like to concur that you have a very pretty profile picture. =P

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    • Ah... Very wise of you.

      Replace all references to "talking to" with "being talked at" and my opinion holds.

  • Okay "I know it would turn you on to send a underage kid nudes" one is disturbing.

    The one about the guy's penis with the freckle on it is gross.

    As a guy I've gotten weird messages. Most from guys mistaken me as a girl, but some girls have asked me for stuff too.

    I always entertain it. Like I mentioned before one girl pretended to be this actress:

    media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/.../...acb34bc2d54a.jpg

    She tried to get me to send her pics of my dick.

    Then this other girl from India I talked to through a "dummy email" of mine and she started talking to me about some weird shit. She was interested in stuff about my mom. She'd ask stuff like if I have ever seen my mom naked. If I've ever seen her pussy. Weird shit like that. Then there was this game that was like "this or that" and she'd ask stuff like would I rather have sex with my mom or her brother have sex with my mom.

    So weird.

    Usually in real life I don't even start it. You see I'm a very open guy. My standards are rather low. I like most if not all types of girls. So I can't just be like "this girl out of the crowd is who I like the most. I want her because she's my type." No it's not like that. With me I'm attracted to most girls, so really it comes down to her. I just take what is given. Most girls show interest in me first. Many will do the variation of a "cat call" and that's a "dog call" (O. o?) and I take it from there.

    I think it's funny so many guys on here give girls messages like that when most GAG guys aren't even into non-exclusive relationships. That's funny. Even though I'm promiscuous I still don't go to a girl and be like "Hey want to fuck?" Then again though like I said maybe it's because of my openness. Maybe it's because I see myself as the prize and not her. Idk.

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  • I do. The other day I was waiting for the train when I saw this hot girl. It was really cold, so I went to her and whispered "Hey sexy, can I see your knees?". Do you know what she did? She flipped me off and told me to fuck off!!! I was like "Pruuuuuuude!!!".

    Women nowadays are so stuck up...

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  • My inbox is always empty but I have wondered what the messages that girls complain about looked like. If that's a daily occur ancestral I could see how that gets old real fast. lol

    I doubt they think it's normal, they probably just do it for fun. In real life I doubt any of them would say that shit. Actually maybe they would, idk. Personally I dont, nor do I think anyone I know would say that stuff.

    Also compared to this, the messages you've gotten are fairly tame...

    http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=UT2thy-JDbw

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    • It's not a daily thing, but it does happen a fair amount of times monthly.

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    • Nah, I doubt it. Most of them are fairly spread out and have a different tone to them. And as you can see, I get somewhat similar messages as the one in the video, yeah. Some of the ones I took were sent to me in mid-conversation when we had literally not been talking about anything sexual at all.

    • So I guess the video gives an acurate depiction of what girls on this site deal with.

      I don't know they might make new accounts or switch up their strategies. There's really not that many users on this site so i doubt its a lot of different people. I guess maybe some people join for a week, send some perverted messages and then leave after they've had their fun.


      Reguardless,
      that sucks that you get those but I guess there's not much you can really do about it :/

  • sorry but i disagree for bringing up private messages in public. it's sth that called privacy and should be respected. ;-)

    whatever they write it'd be better to report them instead of this, because you might lose all the right you have. :;-)

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    • Nah. I didn't include any usernames, so it should be ok and I'm pretty sure I'm following all the rules. If anything, these guys who sent me these messages (at least some of them) should learn how to respect MY privacy by not asking me for inappropriate pictures. Karma. :P

  • hahaa the one on the very bottom right seems like a guy just trying to reach out for some advice :D and hell no I wouldn't open up on a girl like that in real life. this makes me glad im not a girl on GaG.

    #thehorror #thestruggleisreal

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  • lol. Your picture reminds me of this

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-EVMmNtHXw

    But those messages don't seem that bad. They're pretty funny actually, and at least they're short and to the point. I once had girls on here send me messages about their problems. One girl sent 6 messages in a row using all the allotted characters but no punctuation, paragraphing, or recognizable sentence structure. I literally couldn't make any sense of it. I'd take your messages over that for sure.

    But if you or anyone wants to stop receiving those, there's a setting on messages that restricts your received messages to only people you're following. That'll cut down on the spam.

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  • Some things they won't say like that of course because sitting behind a computer/phone screen is really easy. I honestly could never tell a girl she is pretty w/o knowing her first because I don't have that courage. But, why did "Hi lumos I was wondering how to not make a girl mad" annoy you? He was asking you a question most likely because you are a guru, so typically guru and master are associated w/ good help. And why did the guy trying to befriend you because he thought you were Asian offend/creep you out? I got a weird message from a girl from sudan, she told me to email her on her personal email and wouldn't tell me, but I don't know if GAG tracked or not because the messages are deleted so I couldn't show you, I found it really weird she just kept telling me to email her, does GAG track messages? Once a girl messaged me saying "Hi! I wanna be friends" and once a girl said "Hey, I saw one of your questions and I just gotta tell you you're cute" (She helps me w/ my girl problems sometimes so it was good she messaged me :P). But, those feet guys were weird and creepy, tbh. Can we trade eyes for a day?(You can add that to your weird question list :P)

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    • It didn't annoy me. It was just a weird question to ask, haha. And the guy who thought I was Asian didn't offend me or creep me out. Again, it was just a weird message I got. I think it's strange to mention something like that to someone. Like would you walk up to a stranger IRL and be like "HEY! You look Asian! I've always wanted to be friends with an Asian. Wanna be my friend?" :p I somehow doubt it.

    • Yea, true. But, what do you think about that message I got from the girl about my email, why did the message disappear?

    • I don't know why.

  • Yeah clearly they wouldn't start a conversation with you in real life like this because they would likely feel really scared and embarrassed. I think you're getting a glimpse of what many guys want to say and are thinking though. Obviously the computer gives them the anonymity and the detachment from feeling uncomfortable from your reaction. It's very interesting.

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    • Noooo. I was hoping guys wouldn't even think like this...

    • I'm sorry but I think that's what's going on. The good news is a lot of these guys are likely really young and I hate to throw out a cliche but haven't "learned to respect women." Like they are thinking of you as an object for their desire I think, lacking respect. I think it's a side effect of many cultures but as they age on average I do think this effect will lessen.

      While I can be turned on by women I see in public, I would never consider treating them like that or even thinking these things, but being around guys your age I do notice it's really common. I think it's really promoted by their peers so it becomes exaggerated beyond how they would even naturally feel.

  • I don't know anyone in real life who talks that way.

    I'd be a little flattered by this at first, but I can see why it would wear on anyone's nerves. I pity the guys who are this lonely, but pestering girls on the internet is not the way to go.

    There's a lot of misinformation on how to talk to people. Media reinforces unintentionally by portraying stereotypes that ordinary people already know about: the macho dudebro, the slutty coquette. Viewers of comedy movies wouldn't be as interested if the characters were ultra-realistic and boring, so they add zany characters who say things like this.

    Also, for people with a negative self-image, they get a feeling of power by saying things like this.

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  • "hi lumos I was just wondering how to not make a girl mad" - question, conversation starter, only online starter. that wasn't even bad at all due to other stuff I've seen.

    only like 3 or so are OK in my eyes, 2 of them questions and the other one is a high risk high reward one.

    "hey sexy" - this is the risky one, in a bar either you look like a total wierdo and everyone laughs about you or the girl takes the starter and it leads to what you know.

    In a actual daily situation you pick what is actually happening, easily said one:
    -library, girl reads a book.
    you find her pretty, get your balls together and ask her what she is reading and ask her for help to buy you a book (conclusion she might come to the library often). I'm not going to give you all the instruction details as this is not the case.

    I guess if you see a wierdo you already avoided him with your body language in real life, if not you might have a good laugh and if you are interested you will hear so many strange stuff.. yeah it was funny tho.

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    • "hi lumos I was just wondering how to not make a girl mad" wasn't that bad, no. I simply included it because I thought it was a very weird thing to say to someone, when talking for the first time. It's also a fairly silly question to ask in general.

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    • Well, sure. But most girls won't get anything out of it. Guys who make multiple accounts just to harass girls usually do so because they have some sort of fetish and it turns them on. Girls (usually), not so much.
      And sure, some of them might be faking or trolling, but that doesn't make my argument any less valid. The main point of this question was to show people what kind of messages a lot of girls on here (and probably on other sites too) receive. I also wanted to see what other guys have to say about these messages. So no, it's not meaningless at all. It doesn't matter if these messages were sent to me because some guys wanted to troll. They were still sent to me. They're still inappropriate or weird. And it is a problem, because a lot of girls end up feeling harassed, and maybe even scared depending on the severity of the messages. Raising awareness is a good way to tackle a problem.

    • then my toughts are similar to yaddayadda.

      I admit if you read into what those people write as a girl you will get pretty much fucked up. the people who send nude pics to other people exist (a old friend of mine keeps sending me the nudes he gets from the girls).
      the main fact is that men are considered the ones who approach first so that ends up with girls getting more msgs than guys actually and if you ask me why they are creepy.. I can tell 80% (not going to exargerate) of girls who started a convo online and offline were equaly creepy but none of them were mad/bitter in any way (only if I gave them a bad rating at a rate me question :p). there's a difference between the gender roles as we talk about equality that is still not at it's fullest, there's just too much to it to explain it in a few (many) phrases. I might even get off topic but there's also psychological behavior to it

  • Well that was disturbing to read...

    Good thing I'm not a contributor to that behavior! #RaisedInTheSouth

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  • I know other girls have had this happen, the best thing to do is to report and or block the user who is harassing you. I think it happens online because of the anonymous factor. Not sure if it happens in real life I know some guys harass women in real life.

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    • Yeah, I'd say that most female users on here get these kinds of messages. Especially if they're regulars with real pictures up.

    • It's unfortunate but most users are actually really nice.

    • Yes, thankfully. :)

  • Of course guys don't do thiat in real life!

    This guy probably can't even give eye contact to a woman in real life... don't think all dudes are like this. :-P

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    • LOL!!! Heck yeah he probably jack off to sexual messages. XD

    • These guys* :P Almost all of these messages were from different guys.

    • DIFFERENT guys? LMAO

      I'm known as a flirt on this site but damn that stuff is too much! :-/

  • It seems like there are creepy guys here. But none of these guys approach woman like this in real life. They probably just sit in their local shoe department store and stare at feet all day lol. Didn't know GaG was like this, i don't really get messages from guys so i guess thats why i never realized this. I hope these weird dudes stop messaging you! good luck.

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  • It's the net... many horny trolls out there... just blacklist them and continue on with your life. And I'm laughing at all those guys with Foot Fetishes. I'm like.. WTF A HAHAHA AHA xD

    You could also expose these people by making a list like that Catfished Post earlier

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  • I tend not to use my words and instead stick to guttural grunts and flailing.

    P. S the not making a girl mad one didn't seem to bad - albeit a bit weird for a first message but tame in comparison to the others. And the freckle on the penis one made me laugh. Sorry you got all those messages though :\

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    • Haha, well, I decided to include different kinds of messages. Some rude, some aggressive/inappropriate, and some that are just odd/weird. The "how to not make a girl mad" fit the weird description in my opinion. :P

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    • Haha just name the time and the place and we shall make an awesomely simian collaboration Panda

    • @kambo_trick3y clearly this masterpiece needs to happen as ASAP lol... there is a female population in desperate need of ape like flailing.

  • That's fucked up. It seems like in recent findings like the video of that girl in New York who was harassed everywhere she went that sexual harassment, is a problem. Men everywhere see women as physical objects for their use in which they are not. We need to realize that this is just another social movement just like racism just like stereotypes that must be put to rest. Women sufferage was achieved years ago but racism is still alive in ways. What can you do to change 3 billion men's attitudes toward a problem so primal and instinctual. Men think about sex on average every 7 seconds. It's hard to control but men and women are so different. It's really not justified.

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  • some people on the Internet are socially awkward and have little experience with the opposite gender , so they don't realize what they're saying is weird or awkward. When thinking about it that way, I feel sorry for people like that. Regardless, they should have common sense and respect. idk, maybe some don't know better and some just don't care.

    and of course some of those up there in your collage were just flat out ruthless.

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  • I wonder how many of them were liquid courage induced. But for most these guys, internet isn't real life and wouldn't dare say the same things face to face. Sadly, some other would.

    Presumably you don't get nearly as many creepy approach in real life.

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    • No, not even close. People in my country are fairly reserved. And since I don't go out that much at night, it also lowers the amount of creepy approaches I get. Defo get the most online. But it's interesting, since it supports the idea that people are a lot braver online than they are IRL.

    • Fictive bravery anyways. I was playing the newest Tomb Raider a while ago telling myself how I would cower in fear at the idea of doing any of the island things. And there I was, leaping from wall to wall over a 1000 feet of nothingness. Simply because if I failed, she would get impaled by rusty beams (still makes me cringe) while I was safe and sound in my seat. I just had to start fresh.

      It's a no loss situation for them, they either succeed, or get to try again with no repercussions. How many of them has their 'real' picture up?

    • *these things

  • They are desperate and want you to talk to them so they get off so they're not thinking straight they're not themselves and while im guessing these guys don't get laid irl they are probably more normal acting and appearing than you would think. I think of these msgs as a negative byproduct of too much p*rn

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  • See this is why I'm glad I'm not a girl on the internet, but also sad I'm not a girl on the internet. I miss out on the creepiness, but also the hilariousness of some of this stuff. No, it's not remotely possible for most guys to be so awkward and obtuse irl. And thank god it's not. I mean we're all finding carrying loving understanding little sensitive girls to be with, but it's important to be a little discreet about it

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    • Actually started cackling at that last sentence, oh man

    • I'm happy you did, because I definitely got some lulz out of this too, especially what with all the feet ones

  • They weren't too creepy, but they were definitely whack. Whether online or in person to start a conversation that way would be ridiculous, completely stupid. There are some real weirdos, buuut it could be some dude who have some friends over and they are saying these things to hopefully get a response. I could totally see that. OTher than that some messed up dudes

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    • Most of them were just weird, yeah. A few of them were really creepy though. Like that underage guy. :/

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    • HERE'S SOMETHING REAL DIRTY:
      mud.

    • yep =D mud is pretty dirty. =DD

  • Oh my goodness there are some sick soulds around!
    You remember, I never asked you to put anything on and by surprise you dupicated one of the looks I had asked a question about and made a pic... I was positively shocked haha :-)

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    • Hahaha, see. It's much more fun and surprising when people do stuff without being asked :P

    • Oh yes! I still enjoy remembering it haha :-)

  • I made a fake girl profile on okcupid and it got 300 messages worse than those in 6 days and maxed out messaging limit

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  • Yea in real life.. real men / guys don't say them things to girls
    to be a man.. you got to act like a man and not like a little boy.

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  • More from Guys
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What Girls Said 13

  • Thank you for your compliment on my feet, sexy boy! Please send me a pic of your dick and I will show you a pic of my goodies too.
    ... Said no girl ever.
    cdn.someecards.com/.../...ZTBlM2E2OTBmMDNmZmEw.png
    The "I love you. I really do" is probably the creepiest. What the fuck.

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  • Well, a couple of those were only asking to be friends, I don't see anything wrong with that. The others were obviously weird and inappropriate though. But no, very few people would probably consider it "normal" to say things like that to a girl IRL. However, since this is the internet, 1) they can do it anonynously and 2) it takes little effort to send a message like that where as in real life it would require much more guts to say those things directly to a random girl.

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    • Well yeah, but even the ones asking to be friends had something slightly weird to say as well. But I understand, and agree.

    • Yeah, they were a bit awkward. I just don't think those guys were intentionally being weird about it. Lol but obviously the rest were completely out of line. I've gotten messages like those before too, it's ridiculous. That's why I now have it set so only the users I'm following can message me.

  • Lots of guys into feet, I see. Hahaha. Thanks for posting, I love reading these!

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    • Hahaha, I'm glad somebody enjoys reading them :P

  • ROFL!!! I love that you did this. Now send me a picture of your feet pronto 😉

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    • P. s. I've received messages like this from 6 random guys just today lol

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    • Wait it was 6 different guys? lol wow. When I first read the messages I thought they were all from the same guy. I kind of feel embarassed now for admitting I was a foot fetish too. I swear we aren't all weirdos we just think women feet are pretty and sensual. :) *blush*

    • Oh I confused opinion owner with asker lol. Nvm I'm stupid.

  • and then people ask why i lost faith in humanity ages ago lol, perfect example.. but thats just how its like in the internet, and that's why the block button is always open

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    • Well, look at all the answers I got from the guys on this question. 52 answers and plenty of comments, and most of them are saying that they would never do such a thing, or that it isn't normal. :)

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    • I know that, but most people aren't smart enough to do it. It's still a good thing to report it to the admins.

    • block, report, repeat - lol, i think step one still works best xD

  • I've mostly gotten "heys" and "how r us", but sometimes a guy asking for a nude crops up. Meh, I don't care too much. I get none of that IRL, fortunately. I suppose it's better for those poor bastards to let it all out on the internet than to go creeping on girls on the street.

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  • You're a hero Lumos :P

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  • Some guy asked me the same exact boner while grinding question 😂😂

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  • This just go to prove what sort of sick things or lame liners that goes through a guy's head but never had the balls to express it in RL.

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  • Lol at the guy who said "Can I see a picture of your feet?" 🙈 epic fail

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  • Some of them were kind of sweet, the others... wtf did i read?

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  • That's gross

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