Is it just me or does GAG consistently bring out an aggressive, combative side?

I always find myself becoming aggressive and combative here because there are so many socially unrefined, tactless, rude, ego-stroking people here and it makes me feel like I always have to be on the defense.
Unfortunately, a lot of people come here trying to achieve one huge ego-stroke and they get unpleasant if you don’t applaud them for what may genuinely not be a helpful, progressive contribution. There are also a lot of people here who seem to enjoy engaging in back and forth, confrontational-toned discussions as if it’s one of their top hobbies/interests. There’s a side of me that simply does not take anyone’s sh*t so I typically don’t tolerate these unsavory presences tainting my posts and that is what ultimately leads to me becoming aggressive and combative.

I can feel the decline in my vibrant vibe. : / I’m usually so sunshiney, positive, and carefree but when I start spending excessive time here, it’s like I can feel my vibe shifting into something ugly. Can you relate?
What can I do to change this? How can I strengthen my ability to be so carefree and eager to spread good vibes that I don’t allow people like this to alter that core trait?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I agree, but I think its just the nature of the site. Any forum which promotes a diversity of opinions will also promote conflict. Many people don't like their ideas to be challenged. Also, some people on here intentionally create conflict. They say things they don't really believe in order to get angry reactions.

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What Guys Said 7

  • I first first start off by apologizing for my tactless, rude, ego stroking, conceited, arrogant ways.
    I will however not be changing that!

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    • Show All
    • Marriage is for chumps.

    • Not necessarily

  • When two or or more contrasting opinions clash, yes that happens a lot. Not just in GaG but everywhere on the web especially YouTube. The trick is to not involve your emotions because that just ruins it. Just calm down

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  • Baby, need sum LUV? Im here for u 🌹

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    • hehe, cutie.

    • Baby, if u ever need sum LUV, juz hit yo boi up. He's always here with open arms happily waiting for u 😉

  • There is no real way to do this, this is just how you are. It's the others' responsibility to change, but that won't happen. You need to look at it and think to yourself: "Is this really a big deal?" (deep breath) and repeat.

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    • That's really great advice! Short & sweet

  • There's quite a few users here who don't know how to express their opinion tactfully... I know how u feel.

    You'll get used to the tactless users, and soon u won't respond so violently (like I have).

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    • ... uhmmm..."violently"?

    • Violently as in verbally aggressive back at the tactless people... you'll learn to just let it slide.

  • No I cannot relate, I have never come across any aggressive posts on here just a emotionally charged passionate responses from passionate people with solid convictions.

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  • It certainly brings out some of the most craziest people I've EVER seen

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    • Ha! I lol-ed

    • I bet you lol'ed. If that's even a word

What Girls Said 6

  • I can relate. I have been here for quite a while so I'm fairly used to it now. It happens when you get many different people together with many different opinions on a single website. People have disagreements and some of those people don't handle disagreements well, they come off as extremely aggressive and they attack the person instead of having logical and rational debates.

    I am typically a positive, carefree, and friendly person and I try my best to stay that way. So, I never go around starting arguments with others and I try to ignore those who want to argue with me. It's really not worth getting very upset about, at the end of the day, you just have to realize that this is an online website and you shouldn't let people you've never even met and probably never will meet, break your spirit.

    If you notice that things on here are starting to bring out a negative side of you, take a break from the site! You don't have to deactivate your account, just don't log on for a few days so you can get back to your right frame of mind and back to your normal self and then you can come back with a fresh mindset :)

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  • Yeah I feel that. I asked a question about whether my outfit was appropriate or not and some guy messaged me and was like "this is not a 'you're so hot site' so don't post those questions". But that's not what I was looking for. The people here are brutally honest, so I know the opinions on my outfit are helpful.

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    • -_- My point exactly. It’s not his place nor right to dictate what this site is for nor to assume your motives behind a simple question.
      There’s nothing wrong with being brutally honest, but some people have no clue how to do it with tact and without instigating a negative dialogue. Some people are just brutally honest so they can inflate their own egos, not because they really want to help you but because they’re in the mood for some good, ole ego stroking.

  • Totally empathize with you. I've faced this so many times. I'd say just do what your heart tells you. Don't feel any compulsion to log on if you aren't in the mood.

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    • Oh, Lawd. Coming from a mod, I can only imagine the mass f*ckery you deal with. Couldn’t do it! I don't know how the heck you do it! As a mod, you are basically being asked to expose your vibe to a sea of poisonous arrows that may puncture your spirit. I can literately feel the downward dissension in my spirit the more time I spend in this place which sucks because I love the whole concept of an honest, open community of people who share, express, and divulge in personal insight.

    • Thanks for your understanding. Instead of staying away from abuses, I'm supposed to "hunt" for them! But its a wonderful learning experience about human nature, and I look at it as a chance to hone my people skills. But sometimes, being the sensitive person I am, I almost feel like jumping into a conversation and give a piece of my mind to the abuser... but I usually manage to restrain myself LOL.

    • lol, I don't doubt it! Good luck not losing your sanity :P

  • I actually took a class that talked about this... anonymity and nasty personality traits work well together. I would just ignore what you feel you can.

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  • It's just you

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  • I was taught to never attack a people, but ideas. Attacking people makes me weak.

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    • So eloquent. Beautiful answer!

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    • My mother taught me.

    • That’s lovely. My mother is an amazing woman, but unfortunately that’s one lesson she never conquered.

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