Why are some guys so weird?

When they are just friends with you, they can flirt so casually and smoothly but as soon as they catch feelings, they become so nervous, guarded and start teasing in a mean way?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Once a guy starts to have feelings for a girl that is a friend, she gains the power to reject him. Knowing that there is this change in the balance of power, guys start to become guarded, hesitant and nervous. If rejection happens, there will be no

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    • romantic relationship and the friendship will likely end too. Having feelings and acting on them is a risky gamble that is more likely to fail than succeed. You may not realize that there has been any change in the balance of power, it just seems that the guy is acting weird.

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    • They do not know what they are doing until it happens then they can't believe what they just did/said. Its as though you are not in control, that is part of why it looks so clumsy.
      Additionally, when stressing out in the moment, the guy may act (unwittingly) to sabotage his chances with you just to make the whole painful exercise come to a quick end. This explains why he is mean.

    • Ah. Got it. That's strange, but people are strange. lol

What Guys Said 1

  • Because as a friend he doesn't have anything to lose, when they start to feel something, they have you to lose.

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    • Makes sense. But does acting like that do any good? I mean sometimes it gives off wrong signals

    • Yeee, you don't make the best calls when you're nervous.

What Girls Said 1

  • Yeah that's always weird as hell. I'm not really sure, but girls will sometimes do the same thing. I think they are just more aware of what the say around you. They don't want to seem unattractive and they don't want to offend you in anyway. However, I guess they get cold because they don't want to get full on feelings. I'm not really sure honestly, I'm not a guy, but I've noticed too.

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    • Haha it's surprising. I am quite the opposite so it's hard to understand this.

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