Your generation is much different than mine, and even moreso than your grandparents. Since our grandparents lived in a war-time or post-war era, they had to fight for everything, ration everything and act responsibly from a very young age to survive.
Such conditions do not exist for you or me while growing up. We do not grow up starving. Resources are plentiful, and even the poor in our country have a better life than our grandparents growing up.
That said, providing everything to children isn't necessarily a good thing. It does not create an early sense of responsibility and you are correct - there are waaaay too many 20-30 year olds today who are living with mommy and daddy, playing Xbox all day with no job. Or still watch cartoon ponies at 30+ years old.
The "men" you're looking for are rare amonst the bunch. You're not going to find them at any crappy college or university. You're more likely to find them at top ranking schools in specific areas of study such as law, engineering and many of the "blander" subjects.
That's your problem: you're looking at college kids.
People who go to college are often more mature than their non-college counterparts by the time of middle age, but people who go straight into the real world have to mature fast. Most kids see college as a party instead of work, which is why people who come back to college after working do so much better.
Also, if your goal is "I want to meet guys", you are probably looking at places where the immature guys are. Those of us who were serious didn't spend much time at bars or parties. If you want to meet serious guys, you'll find them in the hard classes for skill jobs.
The most mature man I ever dated was 19 at the time. The most immature man I ever dated was 26. Generally, a lot of 18-24 year olds will be childish but every now and then, a true diamond in the rough will come along with an old soul that just makes you feel warm inside. :)
I'm sure there are plenty of them out there. You're just looking in the wrong places.
This is the manchild epidemic, thanks to guys running away from their duties of being fathers & mentors, the break down of the family structure & gender roles, religion & morals being kicked out of society, & the public acceptance of slackers.