Do you find this question rude?

I am arranging a night out with people and one of my friends goes, "Who else is coming?". I just find the question a bit offensive with the question, particularly as he posed it before agreeing to attend and it kind of makes it clear he doesn't really want to be there. His job isn't to ask who else is coming. His job is simply to attend what I have planned. I believe that asking the question before accepting an invitation is not polite and gives the impression that you need to be convinced the plan is worth your time. Finally, to make matters worse I tell him I will bring a mutual guy and he goes ,"Oh, that should be fun!". He's fun and I'm ******* dull basically. He needs someone else to make his time worthwhile. I'm not jealous or anything but Im just sick to death of having friends that don't really care about me and that's a classic example of someone who doesn't.


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What Girls Said 1

  • I get where you're coming from, but i dont find it offensive. Maybe there's somebody he doesn't like who's coming and then that makes him not want to attend.
    The question doesn't necessarily mean that he doesn't want to be there

    • His response to our mutual friend coming kind of annoyed me and it makes me feel belittled.

    • I understand. Maybe he was just curious?

What Guys Said 2

  • It is good to know who's going to be in the party beforehand. It kinda makes your decision whether to go or not.

  • If you think he doesn't care about you, then why did you invite him?

    • I didn't think he would ask that.

    • So you never thought he didn't care about you until he asked that? That sounds like an extreme reaction to a rather off handed question. Yes it was a tad rude but your idea that he doesn't care about you when you didn't think that previously bears some pondering about how you view yourself or at the very least your friends