Has GAG done any good or bad for you?

Not the nicest thing to say, but it's done more bad than good to myself. I've helped people with relationship problems here, but more often, I find that I'm beginning to become a worse person because of the negativity, the bad influences and the people with immature thinking, behavior and mentality here. Not to mention, many users' judgement here are very poor and they give very rude answers. Thus, these bring out the worse in me.

So on the flip side, what has gag done to you?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • This site has renewed my faith that there are good people in this world.

    Yes, there will be pain. But through pain, you learn so much about yourself and others. You obviously care deeply about people, especially those in pain. Be careful not to fall into feeling negative in the face of it. That is the trap of being a healer.

    Yes, there will be people who are still growing, and not just waist-wise. ;p There are people of varying maturity all over the world. The site is an open forum for people to converse in a relatively safe environment. Education and understanding can only be found through healthy conflict.

    Yes, some answers and judgement are poor or rude, but if you take them in context, they may not be either. Some people are simply making jokes, being sarcastic or pointing out the irony of life. It may hurt, especially when quite brash, but sometimes a person simply wants attention. And, some people simply don't think before speaking, or in this case, typing.

    Personally, with all of the pain I've gone through in the past year, this site has been extremely helpful for me. I get to help people understand that they're not alone with their feelings. Yes, what happens to them may not be fair, but would you rather help the world than be made negative by it? People are not confident. People feel cornered. People feel separated. People feel betrayed and have lost faith in good.

    The world is one the verge of something great. And I believe that technology allowing us to truly connect is one of them. Just think about how much pain there was before the Internet, texting and Facebook. Now, the pain is more vocal, global and consumed. There is a danger in technology, yes, but there will be those on either side of the debate over it. Don't let a few bad people ruin it for everyone, most of all, you.

    Wouldn't you think good would be there to balance out the evil? Evil can never be conquered, but it can be balanced by good. Without pain, we don't truly learn, and you're learning

    You'll find the right balance again. I'm sure of it. Much peace and understanding for you and all!

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    • I really appreciate your answer. It gives me a fruit for thought, and most importantly how I perceive life and people.

      I'm glad that gag has helped you in coping the painful things that you've encountered in life. What ever the situation is, I genuinely hope it turns out for the better. I have to point out however, the words here are just a kick start to be better, but it is actually you who choose to help yourself by the end of the day.

    • My thought right now is that I feel that in gag, I've come to a point which I feel that I don't need it and should explore something more in my life, though I'm always open to helping people in need should I have the time to help them. Whilst I acknowledge the good and the help that it has given to me and everyone, I just feel that it's time for me to move on and don't waste my time here anymore. Moreover, I learn a lot more not from this website but rather through real life self-observation.

    • You're talking exactly about the balance I referenced. You used this site as a starting point and now you want to expand it into real life. I've always liked helping people, but I just really didn't have enough pain in my life to truly empathize. I've had a great life - many things just came so easily - love, career, avoidance of pain. Now that I've had that, I am gradually getting to the point where I can help people in real life. You're there now - congraulations! I wish you the best. :D

What Guys Said 7

  • I've been punished for things I've said here, by both Gag women and others who've found out about it. The price of free speech, I suppose, but I have learned from this!

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  • Yeah, I'd say it's done more good than bad for me. Sometimes I get a little demoralized by some of the female answers, but I also have gotten good advice on here, and have been able to resolve some personal issues thanks to the anonymity of the internet.

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    • I genuinely don't understand why people are against the anonymity here and start to judge, frankly speaking. And I don't understand those who are against it are highly critical of hypocrites when they are widely using the anonymity themselves :S Sometimes I just feel that silence is golden, and don't speak to soon.

      Why are you demoralized by some of the female answers if I may ask?

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    • I definitely understand where you are coming from. My issue was somewhat similar to yours. I have a mind of my own, but I keep it really subtle and I don't feel the need to talk anything related to it unless necessary. But by reading a lot of the posts by the girls and how they think and talk here, sometimes I feel a little "shaken" and start to 2nd guess myself. In other words, they were influencing me for the worse.

    • I know there's nothing wrong with me. Just that in a way it's my bad that I let these girls influence me in a way it shouldn't.

  • I think it has bettered me at least a little. I just think you have to realize that some people are stupid and here just to be mean or they just have a plainly Nagitive outlook. I am here to help where I can and maybe once in a wile get a nagging question that I'm embarrassed to ask answered.

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    • Alright. I'd say I'm just a bit disappointed. A wee bit of fun, laughs and jokes is absolutely fine, and I understand some users aren't serious here :) But there's absolutely no need for users to get so defensive and rude here (especially female users). What disappoints me even more is that more often people encourage these sorta bad behavior rather than pinpointing it, and kept overpouring them with praising unrelated to their bad behaviour. But C'est la vie I suppose?

  • It has done good for me overall. It has helped me grow into my own more from the advice I've received and the conversations I've had on here. It has helped me learn how other people think and more importantly, how to behave for myself.

    I've learned to weed out all the stupid stuff and let things roll of my back.

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    • I'm glad it has done you more good :) I've gotten good stuff from here too. It's just that personally, the bad outweighs the good. E.g. I get some relationship/sex related answers here, but other wise, I could have learnt many things on my own and explore the world rather than spending time on this website. Not to mention, the negativity, immaturity and untactful people adds on as bad influences. But hey, to each its own I suppose? Maybe what works for you doesn't work for me and vice versa.

    • Weed out the stupid stuff LOL you sure?

  • Its a good place to sharpen my thinking, I feel, and wit. But quite often the sh*t users get me down, but your gonna get that just sitting around not going on GAG, or whatever, so you know. I think its done more good, I wouldn't trade my experiences with the people I've met here for anything

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    • From your replies, I'm feeling a sense that I'm one of these alleged 'good users' who are really ****s that you mention =/

    • I'm referring 'good users' to anyone, in fact any users. They are not ****s. As I've said, I'm just disappointed with the poor sense of judgement amongst the users here (but not all).

      The occasional over-seriousness here needs humour once in a while. I'm sure you've brought laughters to the table ;)

    • Ohhhh I see, I see what you mean now. Yeah, I get that too.

      Hahaha, yeah, hehe. Most of my answers are serious as of late though

  • Gave me some bad advice but I've met some chill people so I would say its done both for me

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    • The panda chillin' with dudes drinkin a good pint o beer, lol. There goes evolution of the pandas.

  • Under the guise of anonymity I have been able to ask very personal and difficult questions about my past experiences just to see how normal and abnormal I was to a given crowd. I have to say I was surprised to see the amount of support I received and the general consensus of "you're not alone" has been great and much appreciated. Sorry to hear your experience has been subpar, its sad to see that the immaturity of a few can ruin meaningful things for others.

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    • I'm glad that it helped you :) As I've mentioned to Brando, there have been good stuff here, just that the bad outweighs the good for me. "Immaturity of a few "may perhaps a bit understated because I find that there are many immature users here. Maturity is not so much of an issue for me, but rather how people behave, respond and think here.

      But no doubt, there are still great users here who are helpful especially towards those in need. they are there, but not a lot.

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    • Actually it's not so much of the good and bad users, but the so-called-good-users are perceived as good when they are not. There are some "good users" who are rude, stupid and unwise at all. What disappoints me even more is that more often users here encourage these sorta bad behavior rather than pinpointing it, and kept overpouring them with praising unrelated to their bad behaviour. Thus I feel that there's a lack of good judgement towards people and how the users carry themselves.

    • On the contrary, I'm fine with people who likes to joke around, make fun because I know they don't take thing seriously.

What Girls Said 6

  • Neither as it's what you allow it to be. I realize this is the Internet so there is much political correctness here, but there also happens to be my stupidity, negativity an immaturity. This site is pretty much repetitive, which is why many answers come off as rude. Some questions are beyond obnoxious so stupidity must be acknowledged.

    I'd say take this site with a grain of salt. A lot of the people on here blame the opposite gender for their failures and problems and are angry and hateful

    Just don't let it get to you hun, is IS only the interweb

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    • Nah that's cool :) I understand that everyone is going through different personal developmental phases or facing different issues at different points of time in their lives. Just that given these differences, sometimes I feel that we could have just embrace this differences as it is, be straightforward (without being rude or mean unless it’s necessary) or just plainly don't answer/respond to them (especially to those who ask real stupid questions). Instead what I’ve often see is someone

    • disagrees with a person (then maybe offer their own opinion), one gets very defensive, the other one over reacts and both gets rude (that is assuming both take the situation at hand seriously). Like you said it, take it with a pinch of salt. It’s all been said, but how many really does that? There are often better ways of dealing with things.

      I agree with all that you’ve said, and I appreciate your opinion. I also know gag has helped many people and shaped them to be better. However,

    • some points that I’ve made about gag are still valid, and even taking the negative influences aside, it genuinely has yet to do me much good. Everyone develop through different ways, and I guess this place just doesn’t work as well for me than for others. Like I said, to each his/her own.

      **sorry, appreciate your opinions and suggestions :)

  • It has helped me somewhat and then there were some people that I wanted to punch square between the eyes!

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    • Oooo, bad ass :D Get yourself some punching gloves. Great work out idea, lol.

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    • I wish I can like your comment, lol

    • Ha if only GaG and Facebook teamed up! That'd be legit!

  • Its done a lot of good for me :) And its taught me a lot about relationships and how the other sex think :D as well as making me take a more mature approach to things like relationships and sexual topics ^_^

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  • yes, I got some great advice when I was dealing with a really rough relationship a year ago and again when I was going through a hard breakup. so I'd say its been good

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    • I'm glad someone is there to help you :) Yes it's good that there are people who help you when you are going through rough relationship. I hope it went alright!

  • well...it's neutral. gotten some great advice and some bad advice. you just have to listen to yourself

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  • Yes, Amazon gift cards.

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