Cuddling is one way to express love for each other, and love is the most basic of needs. Studies have been done with baby chimps and they will actually choose cuddling with their mom over food when forced to choose between the two. I've done a lot of study on human behavior to address issue my own life, and when people are made uncomfortable by compliments or expressions of love it is because they do not love themselves.
For example I'm a fairly decent looking and muscular guy, but I used to lack a lot of self confidence. Some days I would go out and I felt I looked unattractive and even though people would give me genuine compliments about me looking fit, it would make me feel extremely uncomfortable because of the strong belief I had about myself that I did not look fit or attractive.
Likewise, when people are uncomfortable expressing or receiving love, it is usually an indication that they do not love themselves. You expressing love by cuddling with him makes him comfortable because he has a belief, even if it's subconscious, that he isn't worthy of your love. He's afraid if the two of you get too close you'll see him for who he really is and leave him, because he believes who he really is isn't someone you could love.
Obviously I can't say for sure without knowing the guy, but it is extremely likely this is true. Unfortunately there is nothing you can do other than refer him to a psychologist or self-help group. Having a strong sense of self worth is something you must develop over time through purposeful action, and is something you must confront yourself about. You can definitely be an encouragement to him, but there's nothing you can say to him that will make him suddenly believe and understand that he has value and you really do love him even though he has faults and is not perfect.
Two books on the subject I really found helpful are:
No More Mr. Nice Guy, by Robert Glover
The Solution to Social Anxiety, by Aziz Gazipura
Both are also available as an audio book.
Try this ask him to cuddle before , I bet he's more willing , After , well all I can say is if you could read Dr Theresa Crenshaw's book, the alchemy of love and Lust , you'd understand the cocktail of hormones and enzymes in a man's brain has a sudden crash after orgasm, take it from a female doctor. Now it doesn't mean he can't cuddle , but it's not what his body is telling him, this is the time he is the least receptive to cuddling , most men are like that , we can still do it , and I know its when women want it the most , engaging in love making earlier in the day than later in the evening , might help
Try it for just a few minutes at a time, then pull away. Like during the commercial breaks, then back to your side during the show.
It could be as simple as his not feeling physically comfortable with it, for reasons others have listed. Try not to make it a marathon. Also, laughter at awkwardness helps; my boyfriend and I are both very tall and finding the perfect cuddle position on a couch can be tough, but we laugh about it til we do.
Do you know how uncomfortable that is? Feels like shit for them, when I cuddle with a girl and her hair is in my face I'm just like, bitch, get the hell out of here... It's not comfy. Then the arm... AHHHH, I can't feel it after 5 minutes. And if the weather is hot... goddammit that is hell.
I really don't like cuddling if the weather is hot, maybe in a cold place I would try it.
Cuddling is uncomfortable. people like their space. They don't want to be clinged and all up on each other
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I used to hate cuddling with certain girls. Some of you just radiate immense amounts of body heat and it just gets sweaty and sticky. I learned over the years that some girls are just too heavy for me to cuddle with unspecific positions it just gets to uncomfortable. I also hate cuddling with girls I'm only half way into Outta fear that I don't really know her well enough yet and she's gonna get too attached. Other girls could treat me like a living body pillow and just do whatever. It really just depends.
weknowmemes.com/.../spooning-guys-vs-girls.jpg
Lol maybe that's why
I may be misinformed but I heard there is actually a chemical in the brain called oxytocin that makes people like to cuddle. So it could be as simple as him not having as much of that chemical. Without that chemical I would imagine cuddling would just feel very awkward and uncomfortable.
Well, he could of had some bad luck with cuddling or maybe he's just the type
not into cuddling , I really like cuddling myself so for me it would be hard to
date someone not into it ,
Well maybe he had some past bad experience that is reflecting as him being uncomfortable while cuddling.
Some people are just like that and it's very unlikely they will change. In other cases it's because the other person is not really into his/her partner.
I relate cuddling to love and sex to just like. If I don't cuddle with a girl, all I want from her is sex. Is that your case?
He doesn't love you, you couldn't not cuddle with the girl you loved.
Their parents didn't give him cuddles. This is a fact. When you raise a kid without love and touch, he doesn't really appreciate. Maybe he will like it in the future.
Maybe he's just not the cuddling sort, why not try to initiate if he hasn't done so yet?
some guys like to cuddle some don't, I guess he will probably get used to it lol 😁
have you two had sex before?
some guys just like their space
Cuddling is really cool I LOVE It.
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