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Which do men prefer, shy or aggressive women?

I'm just curious. Which of these two traits that men like the most.

Most Helpful Opinion

  • Shy, not that I'm opposed to somewhat agressive women, I just prefer the challange and sweetness of shy women. There's something to be said for enjoying the closeness and tenderness that shy women are more often attuned to. Aggressive women are more likely to give exciting and fun moments while shy women are more likely to give tender moments and offer up the opportunity to work at breaking through to her to hold her warm heart in my hands so to speak.

    Not to mention, I'd say typically there are more times with shy women that men can feel as though they are "protecting" her and providing other "manly services" this is my reasoning for being more prone to shy women are my preference, also there is more of a, at least to me, cuteness factor that comes from shy women more so than aggressive ones. Of course none of this is to say I'd outright turn down a more aggressive woman, after all I'm more interested in personality and other traits than just how well she can immediately express herself, some shy women or only initially shy until warming up and becoming more familiar with people.

    Anyways, I hope I've answered your question to the best of my ability. Best of luck to you (because who couldn't use extra luck no matter what it goes towards) and I hope this has answered your question well enough.

What Guys Said 23

  • Perhaps something in between?

  • Shy, as long as they're not pathetic as well.

    Aggressive is bad. Assertive is fine, but aggressive is really bad.

  • shy with a splash of life confidence to her ...yum

  • it doesn't matter as long as the guy identifies with you. The person you are, whether you openly show it or not, is what matters.

  • i would have to say a girl in the middle, shy and aggressive

  • id say more shy/confident type with a sweet personality

  • aggressive FTW!

  • agressive

  • Your question seems to be predicated on the basis that these traits are opposite poles and always dominant. I have worked for, with and senior to women who have assertiveness, can be competitively aggressive in their working life and yet many women have taken me into confidence and revealed a shyness in their private life that has surprised me, I as a man am shy in some circumstances but outspoken and assertive in others.

    It all depends how we are socialised [I feel] as to how our characters turn out and I have to say that I have enjoyed the company of ladies where the shyness is uppermost and also where the opposite is true. I feel there can be a 'cute' side to shyness but it can hamper in a devastating way if it is too severe. As also can aggressiveness. Some women adopt false aggressiveness to make their way up in a male dominated environment - then in their private life the fake has taken over and they cannot simply 'be'.

    There are also women who are 'aggressively shy' I know a lady who is well known in one country and has to deal with that fame as an intensely shy person, it is incredibly difficult.

    We are all a mixture of so many different traits and they are there held in check sometimes for different reasons. A very shy woman may need to stand up and fight for the rights of a suddenly disabled husband, an aggressive woman may need to watch her daughter date a boy she has disquiet about but knows an aggressive stance would only encourage the bond.

    For me ... ? I prefer a lady who has some of both and is happy to have both.

  • I prefer modest, but with solid opinions. I don't find girls that are easily persuaded or get pushed around very attractive. But mysteriousness is always good. :)

  • lady in the streets, freak in the sheets.

  • I love a shy girl. But she should definitely be able to open up around me after a while

  • Neither

    A shy girls displays insecurity which usually involves her not wanted to be accepted, but rather victimized to reinforce her idea that she is not responsible for herself and the things that happen to her.

    Aggression is an alpha trait used to assist any animal in sustaining carnal needs like hunger and sex. Girls who are aggressive usually lie, cheat, and steal in order to satisfy whatever craving they may have at the moment.

    I find it much more attractive for a girl to just react according to the world around her, rather than react to the thoughts in her head and how she can manipulate, or avoid them.

    • So like a go with the flow type of girl?

    • You could put it that way. More of a "makes every situation a positive one" kind of girl. But that's like see an albino white owl in downtown LA.

    • Why three thumbs down? The dude's absolutely right!

  • Shy, but a minimum confident, in life, but who can be aggressive in bed

  • im shy so I prefer shy women

  • i think the word aggressive carries with it a bit of a negative connotation. I think outgoing is a more appropriate term.

    of the two, I'd say 30/70 outgoing/shy

  • Definitely shy

  • I would say little bit shy and much aggressive.


  • Either.

  • my personal taste is girly girls and if there shy or outgoing it doesn't matter as long as they ain't like ott.

    girls that are constantly fxing makeup and well you get what I mean... girl next door

    • Girly girls arnt nessisarally girl next door. girls next door are more, you kno each other. you suddenly relize that the girl is cute/hot/ other ajectives. causual flirting, feeling really comfterable with them.

    • True I just meant mixture of both, like I don't want girly girl who is right up herself, but mroe the girl next door, its strange but I really like girls who love pink and things like that.

  • depends on what's down deeper like what they like. but, shy girls are cute because of their awkwardness and aggresive girls tell you what they want. no, they demand it. lol

  • shy! it's so cute I don't know why

What Girls Said 6

  • Wow, I am quite surprised to find out guys actually like shy girls much better! I'm posting a question!

  • My experience says most guys like us aggressive women, if they don't admit it!

  • I'm a woman and I'm very much shy. Sometimes I think men would prefer a woman to not be shy. If your shy its kind out hard to turn a man out in bed.

  • I don't think anyone could prefer anyone aggressive

  • i think maybe aggressive is the wrong word here. I'm thinking, shy or assertive?

  • Shy I prefer shy guy.

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