Can a girl tell if you like her? How can she tell if she likes you too?

how can you tell if a guy likes you? how can I tell if she's showing that same interest as well?


Most Helpful Girl

  • In my opinion you can only tell interest over a period of time dating. Why?

    1. A lot of signs that people try to use like "She's playing with her hair, she likes me", can be wrong. She could be playing with her hair because it's bugging her that day or she's trying to get it out of her face.

    2. In general, people are polite. So you go on a date, you had a great time and are interested, you think your date was too and then later she turns you down for a 2nd date. What happened? You thought she was interested in you on the 1st date when the truth was she wasn't but she was polite and, of course, would not be giving you attitude or telling you "Sorry, but I am not into you".

    3. People's minds change a lot in those early stages of dating. I like to say that it is more like a windy road than a straight path to love. We go back and forth thinking about how much we like someone and whether we can see them for the long term.

    So, to know this is to understand that you cannot tell from a first date or maybe even the 3rd if this will last or not.

    If you are just referring to whether a girl is showing enough interest for you to even ask her out, well I would say sometimes even that is tricky as some girls can be flirty and appear interested when that is just their nature. Overall, if a girl pays attention to what you say, laughs at your jokes and never appears to be trying to cut a conversation off, you can try asking her out. There is no guarantee she will say yes, and you need to know that and be prepared to not take it as personal.

    • Well that's discouraging.

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    • You make this sound more difficult than it actually is, there is obvious ways to know if you like somebody on the first date. Have you ever heard of one night stands or kissing on the first date?

    • Jacksparrow55, the two examples you give are not very helpful. I am talking about relationships, not just casual sex. I don't believe in kissing on the first date, and, even if I did, it can mean nothing. There are posts on this site where people have kissed and even made out or had sex, and it meant nothing. No second date came from it. So, no, sex and kissing on a first date do not mean the person likes you enough for more to come from it.

What Girls Said 28

  • I can tell if a guy likes me if: he's usually the one to initiate a text/call, we will text more than once a day and for hrs and tells you to text him back later or tmrw, he sends sexy pictures (not nude ones but maybe ones where he's in his boxers), he asks you to send him a picture of ureself, he tells you things that you know that he wouldn't say to his boys, he tends to stare/glance at you when he thinks that you don't see it lol, teases you a little, finds a way to get you to touch him, tends to smile at you a lot whenever you guys are talking in person, compliments u-if he calls you beautiful he may like you, flirts with u, sexting, wants to cuddle, the way he hugs you and treats u, tries to kiss you, asks you to hang out with him -just you and him or you ask him and he just straight out tells you.

    If I like a guy I will do the following things: when I give him a hug and will put my hands around his neck so that his hands are around my waist and stick my butt out a little lol, make little excuses to get him to touch me or get him closer to me, tell him that he's cute and give him compliments, ask him how is day went/how was school, ask him about himself so that I'll learn more about him, smile alot-it's a habit, flirt with him through texts/in person, always give him a hug when I first see him and when I first leave, ask him to walk me to my car, willing to talk to you whenever you text/call me first even if I may be busy.

    That's all I got!

  • I can tell if a guy likes me. like if he comes and sees me a lot or he comes visit me at work a lot. I had one guy who'd visit me at work almost everyday and bring me food too. so it was obvious he really liked me :)

    • That didn't come off as desperate to you?

    • I'd call that being persistent more than "desperate"

    • What is the difference between being persistant and desperation then? Since you would considr that as "persistance."

  • The only way I ever really know if a guys likes me is if he makes a good effort to talk to me and hang out with me. .. not in a group, just one on one.

  • Well for me, I feel if a guy likes me quite easily... and since I'm a shy person.. I wait a bit until I'm sure he is flirting with me, to smile with him... and stuff... I guess I get really really nervous with him.. and usually I'm the one to break eye contact.. and I find it hard to be near me.. and he is the first person I look at in a crowd... Its quite easy to tell if a girl doesn't like you.. because if she's shy or loud, both types will be obvious if she doesn't like you. But, if she likes you... you might have a tough time knowing whether its interest as a guy or interest as a friend.

    And a popular loud girl, might be quite obvious, coming over to talk to you, and dropping obvious hints, and patting you and stuff...

    About knowing whether guys like me or not.. I'm really naive... I need like really really obvious signs.

  • I don't really know how to explain it, but I definitely know. I guess I feel like the guy makes more of an effort to be around me..

  • Jump on top of a table and scream, "HEY YOU! DO YOU LIKE ME?"

    And if she says "Yes.", well then sir, I think you have your answer :)

    This way you don't have to guess or assume anything.

    • It depends. What if this girls really likes him but gets scared when the guy spills the "beans" and she backs of Why ? >Maybe she's shy, maybe been treated bad in the past or what ever the reason is. Some girls tend to go the other way when the guy tells he likes the girl. So I would not give out that advice:)

    • Guys do that too, I would worry about the same thing with a guy...the same thing EXACTLY :)

    • Lol I like that Idea. a guy at my school did something like this and wasn't turned down lol

  • Sometimes I can't. But I guess he shows the basic signs of a chrush. Talking to me a lot, acting "macho" (which is kinda funny in my opinion), he stares at me, tryes to make me laugh all the time, is very interested in my my life, opinions, likes/dislikes etc.

    Then again some guys just act weird... And that's why I can't tell do they like me or are they simply being weird (like flirting then ignoring me completely).

    A long time ago that same "weird" behaviour turned out to be a chrush, but I'm still not sure he likes me, if a guy doesn't show some of the signs I first listed.

    She will look at you, fix her hair when you're comming, maybe stare directly at you or blush if you do the same. She might be extremely bold or extremely shy around you. (depends on the initial relationship you guys had-before the chrush)

    She might try to befriend you, touch you by "acciadent" when close to you. Ask you to hang out sometimes (it doesn't matter if there is a crowd, if she keeps inviting you she might like you)

    Also try to get to know you and be cute around you.

    • She will look at you, fix her hair when you're comming, maybe stare directly at you or blush if "..... you do the same. She might be extremely bold or extremely shy around you. (depends on the initial relationship you guys had-before the chrush) "

      You mean it will go in reverse, OR become an extreme version of what it WAS before the crush?

  • yes. its very easy to tell that.

    starring at you is a good sign!

    smiling/playing with hair or clothes

    i tend to freeze when my crush is around me :P

    when I pass my crush I turn my ipod to a band we have in common of liking and I make sure he sees it hah :P

    • Omg I freeze all the time!! Its so embarrasing!

    • That freezing thing is weird though... I remember saying hi to this girl and she just stood there staring off into space away from me. I thought I did something wrong...

  • Yes. If a guy's interested I can always tell. Men get this look about them, thir eyes soften, their smiles grow wider, they make and effort to 'bump' into you when you're walking together, they call/text often, if you've been out they often call text not long after you've left them to tell you tey enjoyed their time with you. Guys tease, they flirt, they test the water with subtle sexual comments, et cetera.

    I don't know if it's easy to decipher a woman's interest. I often make reference to him being cute and sweet, blush often and try to break eye contact so he doesn't know just much like him.

  • I can usually sense it when a guy likes me plus like others said he gets a look in his eye and his eyes never leave me.

    If she's always staring at you, looking at you in the eyes when she talks to you, talks to you about things she knows you have in common/you like, says your name a lot or even at all really, teases you, says something kind of strange (which looks like she just blurted it out) and then looks horrified after, pays more attention to you than everyone else, asks your advice or to show her how to do something, tries to get you alone someway, shows up places randomly where she knows you will be, compliments you, asks about your family, says when she'll see you next when she's saying goodbye (like "see you Wednesday!") remembers things you talked about from past conversations, says she's interested in things she knows you like, etc... there's a pretty good chance she likes you!

    Ask her to do something you both have in common! It can be like a friend thing if she doesn't like you (like like-like you) or it could be an intro to more!

    • I remember things from past conversations all the that weird? could that be taken as obsessive?

    • You could have a really good memory & remember things that resonate emotionally, cause you cold FEEL it.. I don't think it is obsessive, & if yo want to act, it is a very valuable skill.

      I have an archive of coversations with all sorts of people just crushes, could be the guy at metro, or the woman on the park bench... I do not TRY , they just appear.

      I get to expund o them tho if I want, but obsessin is something you can NOT stop.

      NOT-something that you do well, efficiently, or a lot of^

    • Is "ill talk to you tomorrow!! :)" basically the same this as your example, the "see you wednesday!"?

  • I don't think you can ALWAYS tell when someone likes you - some people are pretty good actors, and some of us may be a bit blind/dense. ^^;

    What you might want to take into consideration isn't just the way she acts around you, but the way she acts around everyone else as well. (And not just to see if she's a total bitch to your classmates.)

    I, for example, am a pretty outgoing and assertive girl - normally. So if I get all quiet and shy on you, something may be up.

    • " I, for example, am a pretty outgoing and assertive girl - normally. So if I get all quiet and shy on you, something may be up. "

      -- Definitely. ^^

  • lets seewhat I tend to do is:

    pick on him

    try to touch him like in the arm or somehting on that sort

    smile loads

    stare ,but not freaky stare

    • About pick on him part, do you do it differently if the guy was a friend

  • a guy can be dropping hints left and right that he likes me, and I will be totally oblivious to what is going on. and I unintentionally flirt with guys not knowing that I'm flirting, because I thought I was just being a nice friendly person. so just saying, some girls have no idea what's going on.

  • I can tell with certain guys, but with others I can't. And as to if she's showing interest, it's really about what type of girl she is. If she is more outgoing, it will be more obvious. With more shy girls it will be very subtle and small things. I guess it's the same way with each gender. With some it's obvious with others it's incredibly subtle.

  • girls are pretty good at telling when it comes to the guys they're not interested in. but when it's the guy they like, they get confused.

  • we almost always can. if you're too nice to us, teasing us, not talking much, stuttering, getting jealous when we talk to you about other guys we like / met etc. you're body language usually tells when you're nervous

  • by they way he look at me and body language some guys get nervous and we like that because we know you like us...

  • hm. it's different from girl to girl. if she spends a lot of time talking to you and she seems to enjoy it, then that's one upside and that's possibly a sign.

    if she refers to you as her good friend or buddy, then I would doubt it. more than likely she's telling you that so you get the hint. but don't give up yet...girls tend to fall for good friends

    if you hang out frequently and she seems to play a lot, then she's possibly flirting and she's comfortable around you.

    one thing I know most girls like is honesty. if you like her, she may appreciate it greatly if you just come out and say so. if she rejects you, then hey, at least you know you tried, but if not, then you're starting out on the right foot with her because she knows that you can be upfront with her.

    • One thing I know most girls like is honesty. if you like her, she may appreciate it greatly if you just come out and say so. if she rejects you, then hey, at least you know you tried, but if not, then you're starting out on the right foot with her because she knows that you can be upfront with her. "

      - Definitely... You could win her over from honesty -alone!


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    • Was that a example, or for REAL lol... Spot on tho - :-).... Perfect.

    • But watch for the creeps...cuz they may be open....but...dont be a creep...all creeps deserve to be in jail lol

  • just because a girl says haha in her texts, it doesn't mean that she likes you... just to finish what I forgot to say in that comment(:

    but sometimes it might be hard to tell. I try to talk to my crushes just as much as I talk to anyone else, but usually not more unless I'm sure they like me back. haha I don't want to let on that I like them.. that's the guy's job(; but if you look at her and always catch her eye, that means she's probably scoping you out more than you glance at her. either way, it's just kind of difficult to know for sure... why don't you just ask? it's better to take a shot, because girls are always waiting for their guy to ask them out. even if she doesn't feel the same, she'll still commend you for being brave and for trying! (:

  • ok when you like someone you often think bout her and talk bout her unexpectly and sometimes when your alone you daydream bout her . ok to tell if she likes you then she might blush around you often giggle or flirt .or you might unexpectly bump into her a lot

  • If a girl likes you back she will use smiley faces and say haha or lol a lot.

    • ...and if she has a boyfriend?

    • The part about the "haha"? Is that for real? I got this girl I'm trying to get know a littel better and we don't know oneanother that well and she uses a lot of "haha in her texxt's..

    • Actually, I use haha a lot whenever I'm texting...

  • not because she smile it means she likes u, but if she keep that smile on her face and send you kiss an you catch it and smile.

  • I can usually tell if a guy likes me, but it all depends on how good he is at hiding it.

    If a guy all of a sudden gets super shy, then it is pretty obvious. but also if it seems like they are telling everyone who they like but they just won't tell you, then that also could make me think he likes me. But of course, there is the typical flirting, and that is always a bold move to let a girl know you like her, not nessecarily a GOOD one, just bold. If it seems like a guy is going out of his way to talk to me, then I'll just observe his actions and see if it seems like he likes me. One thing that I always do is check to see if a guys hands are shaking, because mine shake when I'm nervous and I get nerous around people I like.

    you can tell if a girl likes you too by, well, pretty much everything.

    1.) if she all of a sudden starts looking "better" or if she looks like she is trying harder than usual, then she may like you.

    2.) if she looks to be going out of her way to talk to you.

    3.) if you catch her looking at you, and then she looks away as soon as she sees that you see her, then she most likely likes you and is just shy.

    4.) if she is more shy than usual and tends to not really know what to say when you guys talk, but she still hangs around you even with her nervousness.

    5.) if she just simply hangs around you a lot and you find yourself naturally just walking with her in the halls or having conversation with her when at all possible, then she may be the one making that happen.

    6.) if you hug her and she either quickly lets go, nervously, or if you hug her and she hugs you back for a really long time and/or prettty tightly. that would mean that she doesn't want to let go of you, and that she feels something very strong towards you.

    7.) if she face gets a little red when you talk to her, or if she studders when she talks to you.

    8.) CHECK HER HANDS. are they shaking? are they holding/fidgeting with random things? is she tugging on her clothes or just fiddling her hands together, then she most likely likes you and is just really nervous around you.

    9.) if she is more of a confident girl, then if she is flirting with you a lot or hugging you really any chance she can, then that is a reallyyy big hint. or if she starts talking to your friends, or just suddenly seems to be like best friends with your bestfriend, then she may have told him that she likes you, and that brought them close. she may have told him so she can find out more about you or she may just be talking to him to find out more about you.

    hope I helped :)

    • Wow that's some great inside there! I'm going to keep that in mind myself :)

    • wow are you an expert

    • yes helpfull but what if your in schooll and this girl you never talked to before is crushing on you and you only see her in the hallways now what HUH enough with the mixed signals plox :[

  • well if you want to know if she likes you back, I know it seems hard, but confront her about it. because if you get other people to talk to her or if she finds out through someone else, it can seem awkward and she'll never bring it up. who know, she might like you back? if its to hard to ask her face-to-face, how about Facebook chat?

    if she likes you back, she'll almost definitely tell you, and if she doesn't and your friendship is strong enough, you'll get through it and retain your friendship (even if its a little awkward at first).

    i reckon you should go for it and ask her, this way you'll know it from her, and exactly how she's feeling. hope this helps xx

  • ~Girl here~

    I know when a guy likes me if

    he makes a lot of eye contact with me.

    im talkin bout like holding an 8 second stare with me.

    and if I like him too... I stare backkk.

    if I don't I turn away.

  • normally, the guy will start flirting with you, and ONLY you. body contact, talking more, the usual, and if she responds the same way, your in :)

  • we can't always tell when a guy likes us, unless they make it obvious. like if a guy is always talking to the girl or trying to make her laugh, having his friends talk about him to the girl he likes, the girl will obviously get the hint. but if the guy doesn't talk to her and doesn't try to get her attention, she will most likely have no idea...hope this helps! :)


What Guys Said 6

  • Shy girls will not make eye contact and other girls will make some eye contact or make it a staring contest. Some people make eye contact for the sake of being courteous. Some people stare. Some people seem very interested because they're a people person. Some girls will laugh at everything. Some girls might not have a great sense of humor and give you a fake laugh or smile. If a girl pays attention to everything you say she's just being nice as it would be rude to talk to someone and not pay attention. Some people like to tease or joke around relatively more than others. Some girls act friendly towards everyone including their crushes and some girls act especially different towards their crushes. Some people hide any signs of attraction. Playing with hair could just be a bad habit. Pupil dilation could be due to medication or to a sudden subtle change in lighting which you might not notice. Lots of talking or wanting to hang out could mean they just like talking and hanging out with you as a friend. She might show all the signs because she likes you as a best friend. People act differently depending on the person's personality - some people look like you could joke around with them and others look more serious, etc. Bumping into people could just be coincidence because you go to the same school, live in the same area, etc.

    Catch my drift? This also applies to guys; it's no wonder why it's so hard to meet people.

    It is difficult to tell depending on the individual. Shy girls will not show signs and bolder girls will show all the signs. Friendly and flirtatious girls are even harder to read. Some girls will become shy if they're attracted and other girls will be the complete opposite. There is no reliable way to tell. What you might see as being interested might just be her being friendly. The best way would be to ask them and even then girls don't always say what they mean or mean what they say haha. I hear girls commenting on how they're annoyed by guys thinking they were interested in them when they were just being friendly.

    If I had to choose the most reliable sign of interest it would be staring/smiling across the room, repeatedly (first glance could be out of kindness or surprise). Also make sure they're actually looking at you and not the hot person near you lol. Why this sign? There is no reason to do that unless you find the person [physically] attractive. I like to stare back, or wave to the person or wave back lol.

    Personally, I like to be direct and let them know rather than wait for the confusion and drama to set in.

  • She'll play with her hair, she'll return your eye contact, she'll smile, she'll continue a conversation when it pauses, she'll stand close to you, she'll ask you get the idea.

  • If a girl isn't like ALL over you, then I'm pretty sure it's impossible to tell whether she really likes you or not... lol ;)

  • Lets say it this way girls/women give us allots of signs it's just that we men do not understand them most of the time.As it is told before you should look to what the girls does when she talks to you if she makes her self up when he talks to you or plays with her hair that's a sign. Of course the long smile and staring is another. You just test the girl out of course by laughing and checking if she laughs back.Or just go and use a sentence like how late is it ? If she laughs all the time and looks interested you should go a step further .

    with other words keep your eyes open and look for things she doesn't do normally.

  • This is always a funny subject. I think people "like" to think they would know but I think the reality is, there's no definitive way of knowing someone likes you short of asking them. Girls are the worst at this and as soon as they think you like them, they'll either give you a shot, or play hard to get, which will either turn into a long drawn out denial, or a much earned approval. Either way, both will breed resentment, sooner or later.

    ***Never put in more time/effort for someone else if they're not willing to do the same for you :)

  • i agree with this same thing she said and I qoute " normally, the guy will start flirting with you, and ONLY you. body contact, talking more, the usual, and if she responds the same way, your in :)"