When a guy says it's over, is it really over?

Ive dated this guy for 3 years, he's amazing, and I'm head over heels. However, in those 3 years we broke up many times because of promises he... Show More

Most Helpful Opinion

  • i don't blame you for being torn on what to think.. it seems that on one end you want to follow you instinct and hope that determination and persistence leads you back to where you once stood.. on the other hand you're fighting what seems more and more like reality of him showing more signs of not coming back..

    however from the facts here, it seems he really means it.. the reality is if it didn't work out all those times, it's probably not going to work out at all.. I don't know the details of everything you and him shared in those years but according to him, it doesn't seem to be anything special enough to keep; maybe enough to remember and nothing more.. take a few deep breaths, calm yourself for a minute.. and really, take a very broad look at everything that happened.. so he was special, but can you find someone better? remember everyone you've met.. everything u've heard about relationships.. remember that there is no rule to life, life is random.. and things more than likely happen for a reason..

    also, by you pleading him to come back, you're lowering ur value to him as a person.. it's kind of tricky.. but it's kind of like the chinese finger trap; although hard to resist but the more you plea, the less likely he might come back to you.. if you want, compose yourself as much as you can, tell him honestly everything you feel, and be brief about it.. and let him go.. just as long as you say things that will help you move on..

    i hope this helps..

    • Yes that does help, I just love him and Its hard because I feel a huge part of this is my fault. I asked him if he has feelings for me still and he said its not about that...I then asked if he haas feeling for her, and he said well she gives me more attention than you did. I really want to fix my mistakes, I'm going to try hard not to bother him...I know for a fact if he was in my place he wouldve done the same, because he has in fact acted the way I'm acting before

    • Well you know your relationship best, but again, from what u've said, it seems he's done.. just because he may still have feelings it's possible he's trying to get rid of them (hence the "it''s not about that"). keep in mind that in time all things can be fixed.. but "in time".. not instantly.. id say prepare for the worse (moving on) but hope for the best.. that is, getting him back.