Guys don't like good girls ?

ive heard that guys prefer "sexier" girls who are more experienced and comfortable with their sexuality, like party girls who like to drink and smoke and play around. I'm not like this, I don't smoke or drink ( I'm not religious by the way I just don't do these things because I don't like them) and I try to be a friendly nice person. my friends say I'm too " innocent" but only people who know me think this because its not usually obvious until you get to know me better.people usually seem suprised when they come to the conclusion

is this off-putting for guys to be a 'good girl' ? is it better to be a 'party girl'? if so why ? or why not ?

just to clear things up this ISNT for religious reasons, I'm not religious


Most Helpful Guy

  • True story, names changed.

    When my high school yearbook was being created, there was a poll for "most beautiful guy/girl" that everyone filled in. Rebecca was very very sexy. Everyone assumed that she'd win. Problem was, Rebecca was a bit of a pain in the butt. She wasn't mean, but she was very self centred and superficial. Always cared about being 'perfect'.

    When the poll was held, Rebecca didn't win. Infact she came 3rd. Another girl, Lisa, won hands down (from memory something like 80% of the votes). Lisa was a 'bigger' girl, not fat, but not model thin. Thing is though, she was the sweetest nicest person on the planet. Always helped out, always said hello, not up herself.

    I often tell this story to girls that think guys just care about looks, but here it applies about personality too. Guys do like good looking girls, and we'll instinctually notice a sexy girl, but at the end of the day, a 'nice' girl is far better then a bitch. We'll have a one night stand with the bitch, we'll marry the nice girl.

    And personally, a girl that smokes is a complete and utter turn off.


What Guys Said 44

  • It's not off putting, and it's not that guys don't like good girls.

    But there's something very attractive about a girl who is confident and sure of herself. A girl doesn't have to smoke or drink or be a party girl, but if she can tell a good dirty joke she's got my interest. If she's comfortable in her own skin, that goes a long way to making a girl sexy. A girl can be brash without being vulgar. "Friendly and nice" is fine for a house warming party or a dinner party. If you're at a club, or a party where you want to meet people, you should let some other sides of your personality show through.

  • Guys like good girls, girls don't like good guys. :)

    • If I knew who you were I would shake your hand!

    • Show All
    • So not true! :P

    • I wrote this 5 months ago.

      Apparently, I've been proven wrong once, since then.

      Which is fairly strange, by the way.

      A girl is totally all over me because of how "nice" and "cute" I am.

      It appears there ARE exceptions.. xP

      But exceptions are still rarer than the common. :(

      Oh, and by "good girls" I think I don't mean "overly religious" and "prude" and "asexual".

      My views change as I gain experience, you know. xD

  • Seriously, what kind of people told you this stuff?

    Some guys might be into party girls and sluts, but I'm not one of them. And I can't speak for all guys, but I know I'm certainly not alone. I want a quality relationship with a quality girl...if you want the same with a quality guy, don't change the person you are.

    • BTW, I'm not putting down girls who like to hook up with guys, etc...just saying that it's not what I'm personally going for. And a girl should be able to have a little fun, but that doesn't mean compromising her (or my) values.

    • I think it's a thing society has started to imprint into our brains. "OMG YOU MUST PARTY, DRINK, AND BE EASY IN ORDER TO BE COOL!" It's rampant in that age group.

    • Sad but true.


    "Good girls" don't play games with men's head. She's mature enough to know how to care for a man and also his feelings.

    Men can party with sexy, naughty girls all they want. But men have emotional needs too, and it will get to the point where he doesn't want to play games anymore.

    "Good Girls" > "Cheating ass girls"


  • I think plenty of guys go for the type of girl you're describing. I like the friendly, smart, witty, cute, innocent type of girl. However, she shouldn't be overy sweet or timid, because sometimes that can be an issue. Some girls won't speak up and have an independent opinion. Some girls are too sweet for their own good, and they let people hurt them and walk all over them. You can be sweet and innocent, but you also need a backbone and a mind of your own. You need to be able to communicate what you want and you need to be able to set your foot down.

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What Girls Said 21

  • I agree with what most of the guys have said. Of course party girls are gonna get attention, but it's only superficial that lasts the night while they're drunk or need an ego boost. Don't change who you are for anybody- especially people who tell you you're too innocent- sounds like they're jealous of your good rep if you ask me. No one respects loose girls, because it's just too easy to act that way and guys see that ALL the time. Guys want something different (innocent) because then they feel like they've found something special, and something that no guy- or not many other guys- have had before. Even if a girl was the most gorgeous person on the planet, if a guy is out with her and there's half the club saying- ah yeah I've slept with her blah blah- he's gonna feel like she's a worthless piece of trash.

    And yeah- like one of the other guys said- the only guys who might be put off by your self-respect, are those who just wanna f*** and chuck. Basically they might be attracted to you, but as soon as they talk to you and see that you're not like that, they think- nah can't fool this one, I'll go for the easy girl over there. And that's all there is too it really.

    You keep doing what you're doing though and sod anyone else. I can guarantee you'll have more fulfilling and longer lasting relationships than your 'mates' put together.

  • Guys prefer sexy girls for sex, and some prefer an experienced girl for a partner too, but some guys are all about the inexperienced or innocent girl for relationships. Thankfully there is someone for everyone.

    I have dallied between being a good girl (most of my life) and having fun now that I am divorced and I quickly found:

    1. FWB is not worth it. I would rather wait to be with someone special than have some temporary sexual fix that usually isn't that great.

    2. I have to stay true to who I am. I like looking sexy but realized I wanted to tone it down for myself because I just feel better and relate more to being the "good" girl. I am a woman now, not a girl, so no one is going to see me as an innocent but I did not find any benefit to being seen as the super sexy woman. Who needs random men gawking just because they think they can get you into bed.

    3. If you look like a party girl and too wild, some of the greatest guys around will be intimidated by you and won't approach you. They may also just want to avoid you. Some guys see party girls as flaky and airheaded and just not someone they want.

  • honestly, I think guys prefer girls that are confident with themselves and in turn this is what they see as sexy. sure those party girls may get most of the attention but it's not the good kind. I'm sure no guy really wants a girl like that to take home, they are just the ones that guys mess around with. another thing is, sure you can be innocent but that's often mistaken as someone who is too quiet, ain't any fun and isn't comfortable with herself. so I'm guessing that's why guys hardly go for the quiet type. but take it from me, you can be innocent but you should also have the personality and confidence to back it up. these things work hand in hand and this in the end is what attracts guys. I've learnt that recently, and its working so far. :)

  • Dont stress over this... be yourself .. the sexier girls are only good for sex, being a good girl makes you wifey material your the one guys want to marry and have a relationship but those sexy girls are just a roll in the hay..

    Hang in there ...

  • I'm Not a guy but I would say you could apply the same question to whether girls like the "bad boy" or the good guy. I would have to say the bad boy is the one we all stare at etc etc. But we all want a good guy when it comes to relationships... I like to hope that the same thought process applies to the nice girl vs party girl thing..

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