Why are girls so shallow and picky in guys?

Girls these days are 5 times more shallow and picky than guys are. Don't you think so? I truly believe that women are more picky than men b men are the ones who get a bad rep. True they are visual but women are even more superficial when it comes to looks.

Men will be attracted to most women just because they are women. That is no mystery. Even if a woman is average or homely even...most men will find a woman attractive just because she is a woman. If a woman has even one physical attribute, most men will find her sexy.

But the opposite is not true for women. They put much more emphasis on the way a man looks facially than men do. Women only go weak in the knees for truly model perfect, men with chiseled faces. If a man is ugly or even average...unless he has money or power...MOST women won't find him attractive at all. "Nice Guy" is code for average or ugly. Men truly get a bad rep for being shallow when it comes to looks...

But I truly believe men are much more accepting and easy in finding more women attractive. While women are much more picky and perfectionist. And not only about looks. But money and career too. There is so much pressure on men. Women have the power sexually. At least until a certain age.

Men don't want models. That is a fallacy. Women and gay men control the fashion industry, and put pressure on themselves. Sadly most women try to land the "hot guy" when they are young. As they get older, they try to land the "rich AND hot guy". Then they just try for the "rich guy".

This is why you see almost every girl, including really fat and out of shape ones getting attention from a guy here and there but for guy even if he is not bad and decent looking barely gets any attention from girls. There are fat and completely unattractive women who completely ignore guys of their level (fat and completely attractive men) for better. Whereas those men won't mind going out with them in a heartbeat.

So after writing all this, I just wanna know the answer from you girls. Why are most of you, if not all, so damn shallow and picky?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I agree with you in the sense that they're more shallow and selective, but not in the looks department. Girls barely care about what a guy looks. It's more about how the guy makes her feel and what he's like. But this is the big problem.

    They're attracted to the most weird and retarded kind of guys: Guys who treat them like crap. Guys who make the girl feel like sh*t. Guys who give off the impression like she's not good enough. Have you ever heard a saying that talks about a relationship without any fighting is an unhealthy relationship? Well, that's why. It has nothing to do with working out your problems. It's because if the man treats the woman like she's perfect, and worthy, and deserving of him, she's gonna get bored and leave him for someone who isn't so caring. At least most women do.

    And the sad thing is that they don't even realize this. That's the most pathetic thing about this. They THINK they want caring, nice guys who treat them right, but in the end they never give guys like that a chance. I'm sick and tired of seeing girls with douchebags, and when I ask them why they like the guy, I get answers like: "Oh I don't know..." or "It's hard to explain, he's just so perfect...". The only thing that's perfect is how he uses her insecurities to make her stay with him, because jerks know that the more you put women down, the more they end up liking you somehow.

    Not all women are like this, obviously. But this is what I like to call "shallow" behavior in women. Instead of giving the nice, caring guys who truly care about them a chance, they go for the jerks who don't give a sh*t. This is just like a guy picking a really hot girl who is a total bitch/slut, over the average girl with an awesome personality. That's what shallow is. For girls, it has nothing to do with looks, but more to do with attitude. It's all made possible because girls make way too many assumptions when it comes to guys. Instead of looking at the guy himself, they look at everything else.

    It's the reason why you don't see guys being able to pick up girls if they go out to clubs by themselves. If they're alone, they're creepy. If they're with friends, only then they're "approachable". WTF is this? It's girls, and their shallow head. Why do you think guys become so much more attractive to girls when they aren't single anymore? Because girls want what other girls want? Why is this? Again, shallowness. There's plenty of cases like this, some more retarded than the ones I've mentioned, but they all show how shallow girls can be. Geez, all guys want is a girl who takes care of herself and a nice personality. No big boobs required. No perfect body necessary. And it doesn't matter how many friends she has with her when you meet her, or how many guys are asking her out all the time. Looks DO matter for guys, yes. But at least we don't discriminate on that as much as girls discriminate on bullsh*t factors.

    • Wow, this is so SO true! Good, good answer!

    • Show All
    • 47d

      @Calypso_Storm It doesn't have to be everything but it does have to be sufficient. Beauty is relative and so is Ugly. A beautiful woman doesn't have to be America's Next Top Model or a waitress from Hooters. There has to be some kind of balance.

    • 47d

      @Loveless27665 ironically those occurrences transform us into emotionless beings.

What Girls Said 22

  • bs. I think these guys think they look for homely girls but honestly no one pays attention to the shy quite ones. no one considers them. it also depends on personality, I've known many guys on my level and well above it.. and they were either annoying as hell, or just to much like friends. I've dated guys who are attrative, in great shape, good jobs, nice cars... but their personalities are crap so I over look them. I'm not in great shape.. I'm not huge but I'm not great. and from the female point YES you men ARE shallow. I've had men around my size and bigger pass me by because they're shallow. even ones who have told me to my face.

    get off your high horse and open your eyes. maybe you get pushed aside for your personality. or your going for shallow girls. don't group all women together cause you get burned.

    • Damn how many times do I have to say this. Sure guys aren't all prince charming but what I mean is the number of shallow and picky girls to number of shallow and picky guys is much higher. And you talk about "shy quite ones". How in hell would shy quite girls get attention if they are too shy and quiet. They leave off the impression that they aren't interested in guys at all. And I believe that if a guy is shy and quite he doesn't deserve to get attention from girls at all like they already do.

    • Show All
    • When I see guys making immature load sounds at clubs or walking to the night life I say to myself no wonder I come alone and it must be really hard for women to have to make a selection among such immature idiots. Yes you ladies have it tough.

    • 3mo

      @orrm1234 ever heard of spell check?

  • Science can explain this one. Women are pickier than men since they exist, and there's a reason. Imagine all the time and effort and pain it took for woman to have children in the ancient times. 9 months carrying a baby, some more breastfeeding and taking care of it, until she could have another baby. The man must be worth all this time and pain! Their genes MUST be worth being passed forward! Men are less picky because they could impregnate literally hundreds of woman in a year, and it's so easy and pleasurable for them.

    It's the natural selection. Without it we wouldn't be here.

  • Nature intended for men to spread their genes as far and wide as possible, so they are more interested in sex and are less picky. Women, on the other hand, have to choose carefully who they allow to impregnate them because giving birth and raising a child takes a lot of energy and resources. So they are more likely to pick a physically stronger man with better income. Even if it's just dating, those rules apply. That's how it works with most species - males try to impress females. And it's not "shallow", it's a part of evolution.

    Also, SURPRISE - not all women care about the same things. There are many women out there, who actually date (and MARRY) men who aren't rich or "hot guys", but have some other valuable properties, like loyalty, integrity, intelligence and strong morals, something many people lack nowadays.

    Contrary to what you'd like to believe, despite being driven by similar instincts, we aren't all the same.

  • I do not reject guys out of hand. For me to say no to hanging out or a single date, has to be a good reason. I believe in fair chances.

  • Lots of generalizations here…

    Not ALL girls just want a hot guy. Not all women want a hot rich guy. Not all guys will go for a female just because she's female. Not all girls go for a guy who treats them like dirt. A guy who treats me that way just blew every chance he had with me, no matter how good looking he is.

    I think the superficial attraction goes both ways - guys do it and girls do it. You've made a generalization about gals superficially going for hot guys and then said that guys don't do that when it comes to girls. That is your perception. In the perception of many girls, guys mainly go for the best looking women. So now we're talking about your perception of women and their perception of you. Both perceptions are probably somewhat true and somewhat false, depending on individual people.

    I'm much more interested in guys who are intelligent and classy/act professionally. This means I'd pick an average guy who is intelligent and classy over a hot guy who isn't those things. It also means your generalization is inaccurate. So please don't generalize. And realize that your generalizations are based on your perception, which is incomplete/inaccurate, at least when you try to apply it to all women.

    • Not ALL guys just want a supermodel or a girl with big boobs or butts!!

    • According to an okcupid survey, 80% of men are below average in looks according to women. That doesn't really match up with men an women being equally shallow. It does show that while most men find women to be average ( near perfect bell curve, slightly more attractive women then less) they do tend to go after the best looking, which I would say is due to social pressures, that said most men will be happy to seddle for less than perfect ( I have seen it), the problem is that it is increasingly apparent that women are becoming more and more shallow rather than remaining consistent as your view would suggest. That is simply not the case, this is a serious social issue and the fact that we attempt to deflect ( by saying that guys are just as shallow as girls, which statisticly they clearly are not) or trivialize it by suggesting its biological and their fore out of our hands just exacerbates the problem. Its more to do with culture rather than some preordained truth of human nature.

    • Also by not acknowledging the general selfish and mean spiritedness of the shallowness by saying not all girls are like that you are, whether intentionaly or not, condoning the action. As the Initial question pointed out if a man is shallow he is immediatley called out and shamed, if a women is shallow we get "not all women are like that" which is not a condemnation of the act, but a side stepping of the issue. "all that is needed for evil to prevail is for good men to do nothing." or in this case for good women to not call out bad women on their behaviour.

  • Why are guys so shallow and picky in girls?

    • They aren't. They usually go for any girl with little worry about how they appear.

    • Show All
    • And because of the communication flaw between both genders (again in my opinion) that's why guys are seen as sexist, bigoted Jerks and women come off as shallow, picky bitches. I honestly think both sides would/could be happy if they started going for those who are not inside their box. I mean, when you look at couples who've been together for decades, the person that makes them happy are usually those who did not fit into their initial box, but they were exactly that their box needed all along. And I think that applies to both men and women.

      Now, as for me, again in myour opinion, I find dating to be hard... for me... for several reasons. One, I'm not charismatic, two I don't fit into the American black stereotype, three (HAHA) I mostly don't fit into the American Mans' stereotype either... I'm just me. So when I meet someone, not only am I faced with the reality of why men are rejected by women, but I also experience the race thing, which is not cool. And I could go further into it...

    • But I won't because I also feel that I sometimes think and talk to much! But I just wanted to add that because I feel that to a degree, everyone is shallow, whether it's to their selves or to others and the only real way to happiness is to just stop trying to fit something into their box and just be okay with that individual being to good and special to be just another collectors item.

  • Girls are picky because of biology. Its that simple.

    • men rape and pillage women because of biology
      and have as many children as they can regardless of how women feel

    • Show All
    • @hellionthesage I could agree with that. I think biological both genders are picky but over time both sexes have gotten picky (more so women) because guys let it happen.

    • 4d

      I think it's also partly as there are more men than women even with your longer life expectancy.
      Though to me it doesn't explain why on the okcupid survey, 80% of men are below average looking according to women. While most men's views on women's looks represent a near perfect bell curve maybe that's just online dating but even so it seems like a very big difference.

  • Shallow, no.
    Picky, yes.
    Girls have more options and can afford to be more picky. I also think that they think a lot more about their options than guys do.

    Also comes down to evolutionary psychology. A man's best bet for producing the most/best offspring is mate with as many as possible and hope for the best. Girls get pregnant and have to carry the baby for 9 months and can't have as many kids so they choose mates more wisely

    • There's a difinitive line between being shallow and picky. And that's what type of qualities a person values. Maturity plays a lot into it. I think as a girl matures, the less shallow she gets and the more picky she gets. When a woman choses a man wisely because his character qualities make her feel secure about herself, she is being picky and mature about relationships. If she is leaving it up to her hormones to decide without thinking about the quality of the relationship itself, she is leaning more on the ahallow side. Shallow immature women spend half of their time crying over getting used for sex, dumped and cheated on, and the other half justifying shallow behavior by trumpeting "evolutionary psychology". Love is a lot less unfair than everyone thinks it is.

    • Show All
    • Yet studies show that this is occuring with increased frequency, wich is not accounted for in bateman's principle. I am not suggesting that women are not pickier because of biology, I am saying and the study does point out that their are other factors at play in a womens attraction that were not origianlly there. Women generally do not date men who are paid less then them and when they do the relationships do not work particularly well, most ending in divorce. Women biologicly are inclined to have a man provide for them, our society has created a system where women are graduating more then men from college ( 60% of all graduate are women) which raises the amount of income for a women while simultaneously decreasing a man's ability to fullfill the provider role. This results in women becomeing increasingly more picky about whome they go out with comparatively to other generations and is impact by societal changes and values not the base selectiveness of biology when it comes to money.

    • Further we still have the issue of men being labeled shallow for their base biological functions while women are routinly defended for their "pickyness" which is also a social function that is characterised by an increased sense of self worth (due to having no counter arguement) wich is purely phsycological since the persons physical appearence has not changed nor the way they interact. This results in a situation where women create unrealistic expectations that no one could live up to and yet women are incouraged by both society as a whole and more specificly other women to maintain these standards. Meanwhile a man knows that he will never get a girl that is out of his league and thus takes the much more realistic approach of trying to attract women who are in his league. Watch any "chick flick", and you will see exactly what I am talking about. Women are incourage to be proud of their bodies and not be shamed by them which just further convinces women that they are more than they are

  • Its funny because girls have said the same thing about men. Don't we all feel that way. Not all of us are like that I promise it seems as if this has become a material world. It also seems as if what is seen on TV etc. Is what people want. I am far from being shallow I think we all have something beautiful about are self's and no one is perfect. Like I say if your good looking and cocky and a ass hole then your ugly to me :) I have dated over weight men before and men with acne.

    • You girls have 6 times less gray matter than men. There's no arguing .. men are superior and what we say is final. Women just LISTEN! don't argue! Women - can't open car doors, no innovations, always want this and that ... never give, always about there problems and family .. never can think how to solve mankinds problem, can't lift anything more than their shopping bags - ONLY we men have to lift cargo, do construction, build roads houses everything we DO .. and you want equal fekking RIGHTS

    • Show All
    • you girls' problem is when you say this, you only mean hot guys. But when we say this, we mean 99.5 percent of girls. I am not choosy, will you be my girlfriend. Lets see if you are choosy or not!

    • 40d

      If you're good looking and cocky and an asshole you are ugly to me? Haha, you are deluded. Cocky assholes are exactly what shallow twats like you lust after in real life... after you're done posting your bullsh1t comments.

  • I am neither shallow nor picky.

    My husband falls under the category of average looking. He is nowhere near a "truly perfect model" you say girls want. He has no money or power. He works at a minimum wage job at the bottom of the corporate ladder.

    I have been rejected by numerous guys for being too ugly. It had nothing to do with personality, but I was not hot enough for them, so they refused to even get to know me.

    Based on my experiences, you are completely off base. It's the other way around.

    • Other way around what. The ratio of guys being ignored by girls due to their looks or money to girls being ignored by guys due to their looks is staggering. Girls are far more and shallow and picky than guys. By the way I meant most. There are exceptions here and there but too hard to find.

    • Show All

    • And well said Sab3rtooth

  • I don't think I am that shallow and picky. To be honest, I dated men who I didn't find perfectly handsome, I mean, they looked fine, but they had a great personality! On the other hand though, it was my ex who told me to lose weight! He's like uhmm...I think your thighs are a bit thick! OMG, that was very depressing...coming from someone I really liked... My dad and my brother told me to lose weight as well! I weight 120.. -.- I never thought it was a problem. I do need someone who I at least find pleasing to the eye, or attractive. Adversely, many women find what I find attractive unattractive! I like guys with a baby face, etc etc..Looks only wouldn't do of course, he must have a great personality. I wouldn't choose a man who is too hot because he'd be intimidating, and I'd be too nervous to even approach him or be near him. (Im a very shy guy when it comes to that). I wouldn't feel secure if he were too hot, I mean...how many girls are after him..-.-...I rather pick someone who is applealing to the eye and adorable inside.

    • I love big thighs in a woman. don't listen to this idiot that you really liked and can't appreciate a woman's body. Dump his skinny ass.

  • Guys would most of the time always pick the better looking women even if she had a bad personality. Women, would rather go for one with manners and a good heart when it comes down to the choice. We are very selective, but not in a superficial way

    • I'm gonna have to beg to differ on men always picking better looking girls regardless of personality. Example: I met two girls at a bar one night, and one of them was very rude but very physically attractive. The other one was more shy and not as attractive as the rude one, physically, but clearly she was a kind-hearted soul. I got both of their numbers. I never contacted the rude one. I did contact the nice one.

      I think men's preference physically does play an important factor, but it is less important than you think. I think most men will not date girls who do not meet up to a certain amount of their physical standards, but they will date any girl who is at or above these physical standards and from that point will judge on personality. Like (sorry to use the rating system but it works here) say you have two girls, one, is an 7 looks-wise, the other a 9, but the 9 is a bitch. If I only date 6's and up, I'll definitely pick the 7. There is a certain point where looks don't matter.

    • 40d

      Congratulations sweetheart, you have officially posted the most retarted comment on this thread. If you really think any woman would be attracted to manners or a good heart, you have watched far, far to many of those incredibly stupid romantic comedies and have a severely skewed perception of reality.

      Please go back to watching your soaps and wating bon bons.

  • Because it's my life and I can do what I want too.

  • I agree with all of what you said. I think to be honest it's a society thing, in the sense that women will go for guys with more money rather than the nice guy etc. Ie. society has told women to have a man who is rich or handsome. As he will provide for the woman in the long run. Also the publicity around being shallow and picky for girls is extremely high these days. Programs show bitches getting what they want. So does other media. So the shallow part I think stems from there and the 'new generation' of nasty girls.

    • Sad thing about it is that men are demonized more by society when they're shallow towards women rather than vice versa. Shallow Hal is a good example of the issue.

  • We want better looking offspring and security4 our unborn children. and a strong male cd provide tht. as a women we need a protector so altho we cd like a nice guy he shdnt b a wimp. its jst millions of years in our DNA so dnt hate. rather do wteva u can 2 improve urself jst do you and watch women flock2u

    • What are women doing to better themselves? This is the point that is being made is that it is entirely one sided, if men follow their natural instincts they are shamed, if women do just about anything they are praised or defended. The inconsistency is the problem.

    • Also the fact that men are bombarded with crap from women telling them to be the nice guy and that women like nice guys when clearly that is not entirely true is also a sorce of frustration for many men.

    • 40d

      Good, i'm glad to hear you admit that it's all about looks! As far as improving yourself... sweetheart, you can't improve yourself if you're ugly!!

      And as you admitted (you typical shallow wh0re) it's all about having handsome kids... which you only get from a handsome man.. not an ugly guy like me who "improved" himself.

      By the way, like a typical woman, you have the literacy of a 5 year old. hahaha

  • Honestly, let's just get real here: men and women are both EQUALLY shallow. You can point fingers and cry about it all you want, but when it comes down to it, the playing field is matched. Women are objectified and taught from early childhood that beauty is essential to their happiness, often in the form of cheesy Disney Princess films and other subjected media. Mind you that these very same movies and other forms of media portray men just as unrealistically, causing us all to be prematurely romanticized to what gender standards should idealistically be. All you can do is accept that this is the world we live in, and be smart enough not to fall under those idealistic ways of thinking, but not judge someone who has been subjected to it all their life either. Look for a decent person who you can connect with and don't be hurt if someone doesn't want you because you "aren't attractive enough", because you're dodging a bullet really. Would you want to date someone that shallow? Of course not. So, enough with the gender based assumptions already. PEOPLE are shallow, but you can choose not to be.

    • you lost me @ "Woman are objectified..." and then came the bullshit with the media

    • 40d

      Hilarious... people are shallow but you can choose not to be? Typically retarded female logic. In a world where women care about nothing but how handsome a man is, how the effing hell would what you think about yourself change your attractiveness to women? Aaawww are you going to give me some drivel about being confident? Blah blah... trust me my tiny brained female friend, IT DOESN'T WORK!! Women don't give a hoot about any of those things, except how cute a guy is.

  • The fact that men will for someone even "homely" looking and women will not does NOT prove that women are shallow. It would prove that men are desperate.
    And for the record, I know very very few men (if any at all? ) that would go for any woman and be attracted to her JUST because she's a woman.
    Any man who is like that, is extremely desperate and has no standards. That's not our fault. Most men and women have standards. Imagine if a girl said what you said "we're atttacted to every man, even if they're homely looking, just because he's a man. " wtf? It sounds even nore desperate like that.
    And no. You said that women only want models with chiseled faces and bodies. What the hell are you talking about? if girls only wanted that type of guy, we'd all be single because there's so few men like that. If you're not getting female attention, why blame the females?
    That's what a lot of guys do. If they can't get a date or sex or a certain girl, they say there's something wrong with all women.
    That's far from the case. And if you go through some of these questions, men can be really picky. Mostly about body. I've seen guys call women of a healthy weight fat, or say thin women don't even look like women, or bash small breasts, etc.
    Men and women generally want a certain looking partner. If you're okay with ANYTHING that comes your way then you're desperate and that's no one else's fault

  • I agree, I am actually shallow and ashamed of it. There are guys who are just so kind to me and care but I am not feeling anything romantic with them. Instead I chose the gorgeous guy with a decent personality but he doesn't express his feelings. I admit I am shallow to an extent, because if a guy is a complete jerk (like my friends ex who asked me out) I would just drop him. But I feel so bad that I don't want anything more with the guy who cares if I don't feel a bit of lust. I am so sorry and trust me I am ashamed of myself.

    • You are not obligated to date someone you have no attraction to.

    • Show All
    • 40d

      You choose a guy with a decent personality? What a load of crap, a guy like that would not be considered cool or sexy or edgy to a shallow wh0re like you (by that i mean all women).

      If a guy treats you like crap however, your miniature female brain gets stimulated.

    • 40d

      Like a typical shallow twat you are attracted only to men who make you feel bad.

  • Haha Funny coming from a guy.

  • link

    Read the male's answers in this question, & you'll see men are just as shallow, if not more.

    • Okay. I want you to be my girlfriend. Would you be? See I am not choosy.

  • Men are much more shallow than women. Yes, women can be shallow, but men are much more shallow by far. This is because in order for a man to like a woman, she must be attractive to him. But in order for a woman to like a man, he does not have to be attractive. Women are attracted to a multitude of different things, & as long as a guy has one of these qualities, she will love him unconditionally, even if he's ugly. Yes, most women start off wanting an attractive man, but women grow up & see so many other qualities are more important. It takes men a longer time to realize this, & a good percentage of them never do. And if you want proof, look at society. You will always see men looking at pretty women, spending their money on pretty women, & dating pretty women. But women are always dating men who are unattractive, even when that woman is attractive herself. Men just can't get past looks, but women are usually over looks by 17 or 18.

    • Women are shallow in money, height, muscles, etc. While men are just shallow in looks. Shallowness in money is the worst shallowness trait. Looks are natural based but using a guy for money so you won't have to work in a society where even women work now because they are equal, women are definitely more shallow.

    • Incorrect.Most women are shallow on looks but most of them change when they are in their mid to late twenties.

    • Are you kidding me? I've met women in their 40's obsessing over a man's looks. They are very lonely and i feel bad for them. Men and women can both be just as shallow, and neither one likes to see themselves in an unfavorable light. If you are complaining about the shallow nature of the opposite sex, you are more than likely not choosing to persue a love interest for what they have to offer you emotionally, which is a good indicator that you are pretty shallow, yourself. Shallow people have the tendency to find other shallow people. And, you know, that's a pretty fair deal. The tears and the bitterness are a just desert. That multitude of things that are attractive to women are no less skin deep than looks. Money, muscles, mannerisms, penis size, fashion sense. Compair to hair, breasts, butt, face, belly, etc...

  • that is a complete lie, first of all women are not one large monolith with one collective thought. what's good looking to one girl is completely ugly to another. take robert pattinson. there are girls who go KRAZY for this guy but I find him very unattractive. the type of guys I go for, my best friend finds lukewarm at best. yeah everyone is attracted to hot people but most people are average. that's why its called "average". there are a few outliers (ugly people and hot people) but most of us are average.

    there are PLENTY of average women who would be interested in an average or even unattractive guy, especially if he's a Quality man because MOST women are average looking and most women are looking for quality men. The BULK of ALL women are average looking. That's what AVERAGE means. Yet so many men are searching for the next hot trophy girlfriend. and I know this because I see how so many average and ugly looking girls I know never get attention or asked out by guys. yeah some guys might want to fk them if they're going through a dry spell but that's about it. So, I don't have any sympathy for you. With all of the quality women available, you could find a good woman if your realistic & serious.

    i've seen more fat and unattractive girls without dates because even fat and unattractive guys often want prettier girls.

    most men might HAVE SEX with an ugly woman just because she has a warm hole, but as far as dating her, being in a relationship with her, and introducing her to friends...yeah right lol. I had a friend in high school that was like 5'3 260 pounds but had a really pretty face and dressed nicely. no guy would date her and she was picked on all the time. and the guys she did hook up with would make fun of her behind her back and not publicly acknowledge her. and no these werent the "hot alpha male good looking guys" they were actually rather average. I tried to give her some advice and tell her to stop messing with guys like that, but she didn't have very many options.

    Your screen name is UglyGuy so I'm gonna assume that you're ugly. not just average looking, or not the best looking guy but ugly and you probably have low confidence to boot. so instead of complaining about how shallow and picky girls are, stop feeling sorry for yourself and work on what you can change and you could attract girls.

    most of the girls that are extremely "picky" as you put it and hyper discerning are the hot girls that 90% of guys want. they can afford to be picky and shallow because they have first pick on guys. your statement was a complete lie sorry. if every girl ranging from the ugly fat girls to the hottest of the hot does not want a certain guy it is most likely NOT his looks that they are turned off by. most women are not attracted to a guy who is whining and feeling sorry for himself on a regular basis. it shows that your insecure, not confident and makes you look less masculine. like I said, work on that

    • Ok. I agree with you. A lot of guys are like that but no way can you say I'm wrong. How can you point all the negativities of these guys by ignoring the common negativities of girls? What a biased hypocrite.

    • Show All
    • Yeah, girls aren't attracted to whining and feeling sorry for himself and all that shit. Because when a man is feeling insecure or unconfident, WHERE'S THE 'WOMAN'S' ROLE IN LIFTING HIM UP? NO WHERE TO BE FOUND!!! What about her kicking him when he's down. MORE PRESENT THAN THE AIR WE BREATHE!!!

    • bremen spoke the truth!!!

What Guys Said 24

  • Males are equally picky. This is natural selection at work.

  • I'm just gonna be that guy and defend the gals here. I think YOU have to stop being a dick about girls being shallow. Guys are just as shallow. Not more shallow, not less shallow. WE are human. We ARE shallow. Deal with it. There's nobody to blame.

  • This a is a fun read.

  • Maybe you should talk to some of the women who never get asked out, aren't considered pretty by prevailing beauty standards, etc. You might have something in common. E. g. humanity.

  • I don't know. It seems to me that most men put a lot of value on appearance, whereas a lot of women tend to care more about things like nice shoes, new cars, a big house, lots of money, etc. Men are more shallow when it comes to aesthetics. Women are more shallow in a materialistic kind of way. It's because their maternal instinct drives them to seek a mate who can provide for her and her offspring.

  • this is because women started taking advise from other women about men.

  • Shallowness and pickiness are contradictory. Someone who is very selective is more likely to look at the complete person, and someone who isn't selective will settle just for looks (because it is just for short term )

  • Because they can be. They don't want ugly or unattractive guys. It's just how it is. We have to aim low.

  • to be honest women use nature, biology, and impulses as an excuse. to be honest when given the chance they will always be picky and they're shallow because they would be mad if men did the same thing to them. for example men by nature mate with different women as much as possible to spread his genetics. but in today's society RUN BY MEN it is not appropriate and creates unhealthy house holds. when you put this excuse in women's hands they are not willing to change themselves against nature and make excuses because men are willing to go along with it to make them happy.
    tall man/ really short woman,
    handsome man/ ugly women
    rich man/ poor woman
    in the examples given women hardly allow the reverse unless a man makes up for her short comings in some way
    hence why they are immature. because men just want to be in a happy relationship they just go with it.

  • One other thing I have been hearing/creeping up in conversations among women that even though we are in a recession and it's beyond extremely tough to get a job and with layoffs rampant and no fault of our own that you were laid off. Women bring up that she want's and demands a guy with a job, career. Um yeah NO effin shi*! While your bi*chin to your girlfriends (were educated, college grads, have had our jobs and were laid the eff off), were desperately trying to find our jobs! So back the eff off when we say we were laid off, looking for our jobs, interviewing or taking some job just for the "mean" time until we get into our jobs. Were looking, it's not as though we were laid off and so we just gave up and not looking. We effin want our jobs, every single day were looking, applying, trying to get an interview and were busting our a**es to find our jobs! So relax women CHILL out when men that were laid off ask you out. Plus it's not just US men that are being laid off, women are just as easily being laid off and yes a lot of men want a lady that is educated and has a good job. But we understand the ECONOMY, we understand it's obviously hard and your working as a waitress, bar tender, retail until you find a job just like us men. Were in the same boat!

    I also think women just like to obviously BITC*/say shi* about shi* but that's about it just bitchin* and not really seriously. I think women bitching to women is a lot like men friends BS to men friends.

    • Time and time again I am 35 honestly im very good looking not being big headed in a way its my downfall. Its gets me girls but I get used every time dumped and they move on to the bad guy. Its really effected me almost to the point where I wish I was gay ha.

      I used to beat myself think why im a good lad, gud body, good in bed (i am) Im really starting to believe girls dont care if your good looking good in bed if you would be a good dad, even the size of your willy, they want what they carnt have like you said why is it they go after men what are taken, and there definitely money oriantated wimen in general are horrible creatures. What really makes me angry when they moan no decent men, moan about the bastard she choose over decent guy. For guys like me im screwed not got much money confidence shot from years of rejection, dont think I could go on a date again. Its a womens and rich mans world everyone else is screwed

  • You know what? I blame the media for the creation of shallowness. We weren't born with high standards... it was until we began to watch movies like Cinderella, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, the Little Mermaid, and superhero shows like Superman and Batman.

  • Fussy girls

  • Ok there prob just ducking with us and there playing hard to get SOME not ALL

  • There is power in the word "Bitch" if we like to admit it or not There is power in the word "Bastard" if we like to admit it or not. No woman wants a guy that will take her pet puppy outside and bash it to death but thats exactly what they throw themselves at and No man wants a woman who drips down her leg another mans cum but thats exactly what men throw themselves at... its a messed up world.

  • Absolutely, I think things have shifted over the past 10-20 years. Women look for different things in a man than they used to. Looks have become the most important factor for women choosing a mate. Most guys fit within the normal range, but if you are a facially unattractive guy, life will suck. Just accept a diminished quality of life and that you will likely wind up alone. Women will treat men with an unattractive face similar to how men treat obese women. In fact worse in some circumstances, if an unattractive woman makes an unreciprocated advance on a man, normally he won't go about shaming her and putting her down for it, not publicly at least. If an unattractive man is so much as friendly with a woman that finds him unattractive he will be labeled as a 'creep', 'loser', or even worse. It's like being unattractive automatically makes him less than human.

  • you girls are dooped this generation this is one in one in dating programs that trick all women nice to naughty they teach personalities i looked it up took some of it in but don't believe in most of it women are not full proof guys with most of the women are getting manipulated and would even kill for him look up and dating book and trust me they help you out but truth be truth it is all womanizing tricks of the con artist i learn this i had no money in life last person on the list for girls always focusing on school waiting for the perfect date to come alone what i learn the more UN honest you are in life the better of you are i got hurt trust me women never payed attention to me but I'm going to get rich now because i would be that guy that tells my wife i love her but i don't really love her to her face because she i not so hot i don't think so nice to women be nice they never pay any attention to them i don't have that personality to sleep with any women i don't have a lasting relation with but when your a guy don't make much they will feed you these tricks a tricks and get any women they like line a women up for a year in a row and guess women will always fall for this the alfalfa male has a loud bark but i use to drive cab because i was a cab driver try talking and holding a conversation with a hot women say hi try to ask her question silent treatment think of that i was making over 3000 month a good wage but i don't let them know that summer slow but to the point try to talk to them silent treatment and the sleep with guy who are booting calling all the hot ones i think they all want the easy life but never want to work for it party all day and night even the upper middle class learned from a small city women in the big city have secrets like a lot of flings with marred men and women have husbands a prostituting with kids small city sin city remember play hard work hard lesson learn girls want to not work and girls depend on the man to work not equals

    • women flaws are the most men strengths so take a hard look at him you could be fooled and would not even know it women city guys are experts at this con artist womanize any women get sex then leave this generation like every guys are going to know this at least i tried to warn drama.

  • Yeah a lot of women are shallow. The question you should be asking is, "Why are you chasing shallow women?" Why would anyone, with good sense and is looking for a decent lover be so indiscriminate In terms of personal depth, to give any thought or attention at all to all of the shallow and miserable women out there. There are plenty of good ones out there. You just need to get past what's on the surface and learn what to look for in a person

  • Girls are a lot more shallow then they used to be. As the saying goes "the nice guy finishes last". I blame it one TV Magazines and social media. Some areas are worse then others. My general area is one of the worse. I am the shy type but have a great personality when you get to know me better. The girls have one 10 minute convo with me then I never hear from them again. I will admit I am not the best looking guy. They say women decide whether they will give a guy a chance or not in the first 5 seconds.

  • It comes with age. Girls between 16-24 have the world at their oyster especially if they're pretty...

    By the time 25-30+ rolls around most of the successful good looking ones are taken, and they're left with attractive or semi-successful bums that don't do it for them the way they did in those younger years.

    Being around that age and slaying with girls I never would'a thought I'd had a chance with in my teens its actually kinda hilarious to see the panic.

    Take a stroll through dating site profiles the younger girls are all about getting out partying as they age its "I'm done being played, looking for nice sweet"

    So if your not doing well with the ladies being young just make something of yourself, workout and it'll come back ten fold later when they realize they aren't the life of the party anymore :)

    • I see it as "I'm getting old now and need to find a man or die alone", and that sucks, honestly.

    • Can be fine if you're dating though ;) like I said if you've lived a productive life but haven't had much luck in that department 25-35 is a range where you can just clean house lol

  • i think we all are to an extent, but they have to be more picky since they carry a baby for 9 months, even though we have the pill now that doesn't change thousands of years of evolution!

  • One word Feminism.

  • "No perfect body necessary"?! I call BS on that. I think the reason women are becoming more selective is because we are tired of just settling for anyone.

    Oh the word "settling" is becoming a bad, really bad word with women these days and men are effin sick and tired of women coining the term "settling" as such a bad thing. Women these days are using the term "settling" these days are like oh no no no I will never "settle", I won't settle for anything less then "perfect" or she tell all her Girlfriend he must be all this and meet this huge enormous list before I even think of "settling" and then the friends tell all her GF's don't ever settle but always hold out. Gawd men are SICK and effin TIRED of women bashing the word "settling" and think it's this gawd awful thing to "settle". WOMEN LISTEN UP YOU ARE NOT EFFIN MEN! It's a pure and simple FACT men can be bachelors a lot a hell of a lot longer than YOU! Get the eff over it women when your parents start asking you about marriage, you better not be too PICKY, yes WOMEN it's a pure and SIMPLE fact you have start thinking about MARRIAGE around 27, 28, 29 to 30ish cause your biological clock is TICKING!

  • I completely agree... One of the BIGGEST things women are SOOO overly picky about even though a lot of women deny it is men's HEIGHT! Single women constantly say oh height is no big deal. OH REALLY? Then why a lot of you women in the range of like 5'0"to like 5'5" constantly say or put out there that you only will date a man that is at minimum in the 6' range but preferably much taller like a whole effin foot taller or more. Don't start saying the so lame excuse of cause I like to wear high heels and I don't want him to be shorter then me! Really? So a guy that is in your stupid standard a whole effin foot taller than you, you think with your heels your going to be taller than him? Plus seriously women you seriously don't wear high heels every single day 7 days a week! Women don't wear high heels for just casual and if you do we sure as he** don't want to hear you bitc* when your heels make your feet hurt. That's your damn fault! If your high heels hurt your feet then common since is don't effin wear your high heels!

    Single women these days are so overly obsessed with men's height and they try and make their case but can't ever BACK UP the height issue. Single women when asked about men's height they usually say some stupid BS like (I don't know I guess just cause I like height, I like tall men, another completely stupid a** answer a lot of women say is I like tall men cause of "protection"!) OK protection from what? Seriously from the eff what? Women think that the taller he must just must automatically be oh so "strong", single women these days think "protection" must mean from fights! What effin adults get's into fights these days? Unless your oh so tall Boyfriend is a complete "LOSER" get's into fights. Grown adults do not get into fights, unless he's a punk, deadbeat or loser. So when she breaks up with her oh so tall Boyfriend she must then need a bodyguard since she said she feels protected!

    Ok yes women these days are SOOOOOO overly picky and shallow when it comes to men and has gotten so much worse even in the last 3 to 5 years women are so much more adamant that he must be this and this and this and this and the list could literally go on and on and on and... Maybe a lot of these women with these ENORMOUS yes for some women don't deny it you have these absolutely ENORMOUS check list and are so adamant that he meets all these stupid requirements. Most of the list is SUPERFICIAL and NO MAN is going to meet all her "requirements"! Then these women get so pisse* when she can't find any guy and is constantly told she has to lose most of her superficial list! There is no such thing as "PERFECT" man, nor is there anything that is ever absolutely "PERFECT"! The women that are always trying to look for that "PERFECT" and wonder why she can't ever find something is cause first of all obviously she's only kidding herself about thinking there is a "perfect" and second she's trying to hide her imperfections by looking and having this enormous "list".