Did she withdraw because she's scared of getting hurt?

I recently started seeing somebody about a month ago. Almost instantly we really vibed and got along EXTREMELY well. We got very close in the matter of two weeks... we let each other in pretty deep. She's confided quite a bit about herself to me, things she hasn't discussed with many people she's... Show More

Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm going to give you a different perspective; although I can see your text as being harmless and funny, I can also see her taking it to the next level of feeling like she's "not in control".

    I've been in the same situation as her; I had so much on my plate with work, school, and here comes this really great guy...unfortunately, that meant "more stress" (good or bad, either way, just another "stressor" in life).

    I've also been on the other end where I texted a guy after having made arrangements that he would come over after he got off work. I texted "You better call, haha". I mean, I was just joking (!) and I'm kind of sassy anyways but he took it the wrong way...sometimes texts don't always translate well until you really, really know the other person. Now, from my text, can you see how someone could see that as a "command" (like yours) and feel turned off?

    So, on one hand, she really does need to "lighten up" but on the other, she may need the space/time to realize that having you in her life will be more a positive aspect than just "one more thing" on her plate.

    And, I'm pretty sure she thinks of you, too. People don't often forget the ones they can confide things to. If you want, maybe send her some flowers to brighten her day (?).

    • I see where you're coming from, and that's why I felt I may have offended when I read it after I sent it. I was told by a friend we both know very well that she over-reacted on purpose as a reason to be mad and step back... using the whole "being angry" to justify her actions of backing off. Its not what she told the friend, its just what the friend felt was happening, and it makes sense.

    • Show Older
    • Actually she saw me online a little while ago and we chatted for a bit... told her I was thinkin about comin up and having a couple, and she gave me the smiley face... I even offered to bring her something to eat and she said if she's hungry shed love for me to do so... so no worries lol...

      You never know when you're walking on egg shells heh...

    • True (eggshell part) but at some point, she'll need to step up, too, and realize there's room for improvement/growth. Have fun!