I hate my life ...What should I do?

I have a very strict mom, like there is no other. All my friends call me Cinderella that's how bad it is. I do all the chores, I can't go out. I probably go out maybe 3 times a year, and get bitched at every time! yesterday I went to volunteer WITH my school, and their were teachers. and got home at 10: 55 EXACTLY, and HELL broke loose..i am 17 years old, its my last year of high school, I wanna get accepted to a university really really far and just leave, my mom doesn't allow me to move out, but I don't wanna live like this anymore, all my friends go out, I mean I am turning 18 this year, I should be able to go out. I don't drink, smoke or do any drugs. I also believe in no sex before marriage. So what should I do?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Hang in there just a little more longer until you turn 18! Apply to schools without your mom knowing about it, just keep thinking about that so you have something to look forward to! Make your own plans, if your mother for whatever reason treats you this way, even if she may have good intentions, its not right treat you this way. Once you are 18 there is nothing she can do to make you stay with her. If you have some great friends make plans with them. You can do it! Hang in there, you can do whatever you like once you're 18, focus on school for now, your grades and getting into a good college. One good thing about being "locked up" now is that you can solely work hard for you high school diploma. Once you're in college, you're free to spend time with friends and live your life the way you want to.

    Just hang in there and keep telling yourself you can do it and look forward to college. If your mom doesn't want to support you, you must find a way to do it yourself and you can do it!


What Guys Said 27

  • " I wanna get accepted to a university really really far and just leave."

    Hello? Escape plan, right here! Put a few states between you two.

    And once you turn 18, it's no longer up to her when you move out. Make your plans, and go. Nothing gets better until you do.

  • go to the toilet...take a poop and scream "AHHHHHHHHHHH GET OUTTTA MEEEEEEEEEEEEE"...

    but really...if you're friends are calling you names I wouldn't cnosider them "friends"...go out and find people who like you for who you are...stand up to your mother, sure respect is important but um your mother has to understand taht you have your own life too - if you're afraid you need to go talk to a councelor WITH your mother and sit down to discuss this issue...over controlling parents do not help their children live healthy lives...matter of fact tis the complete opposite

    yorue mom is a crazy bitch and needs to re-evaluate herself...shes making you out to have a miserable life...i think if you talk to a councelor about it and have her actually undertand and have a grown person, with a degree, agree with you on certain aspect maybe she'll get it...otherwise hold on until your in college and then never turn back...

    in teh end, find some friends who can help you through this, not mock you and call you names

  • Is there a reason that your mom is so strict on things? Think deep down. Does she have a reason somewhere? If not, well, and it's just strictness, I think coming to her with some well thought out reasons why you want more chances to go out.

    Remind her that she raised you pretty well; this isn't a chance for you to go out and rebel, but a chance to find some kind of independence.

    Perhaps there's someone out there who she'll listen to. Try to get them to reason with her. Another step might be to find a counselor out there who can help.

    Barring that, if nothing happens for the better, I think it's time you save up, and then get your own place/pay for your own education. If you never go out, then maybe you'll have had some money saved up. Do you have a job? It may be some more sacrifice, but perhaps this will be the way to do it. However, if she does let up, don't go crazy with this new "freedom" or she won't be so inclined to let you go out.

    Good luck

  • Omg... this brings up sad memories.

    I have a friend that is in the exact same situation with you, only she was in depression. It got worse, and her family thought that it was because there was something wrong with her, so they pressured her even more, until she tried committing suicide. Twice.

    Now, I don't want you to go through the same process, so I want to offer you a way out (but it might not work). Please note that these tactics should only be used if there's NOTHING else that you can do, and if your mother DOESN'T agree to get the opinion of a 3rd person (a counselor, a psychiatrist, etc.).

    Here are the dangerous tactics that I propose:

    1-) Building Up Your Freedom

    I don't know what your mother's do's and dont's are, but try doing something in the limit (like something that she would barely allow). If you can do it more than a couple of times, you might be able to make the limits a litle more elastic, and may be do something a little further in the limit, and so on.

    2-) Insurrection

    Again, I don't know whether this would work with your mother, but you might want to sacrifice every privilege and every property you have in the house, and go for an open riot where if you manage to get out of the house, you return whenever you want, however you want. You will most probably get grounded and punished for this. (That is why I said you should sacrifice every privilege and property you have.) In the end, there will be a point where you have nothing to lose and everything to gain, and vice versa for your mother. It will be very hard and you will be grounded/punished for a VERY long time, but you might succeed.

    Again, Tactic #1 is what I used to do with my mother, and it worked for her, but it may not work for you. Tactic #2 is what my suicidal friend did, and it worked for her (after 2 long and painful months though), but it may not work for you.

  • If you hate your life, you should suicide then...

    lol just kidding

    But well, assuming you're almost 18, just focus on school and try to pass in a good college (far from your home as you said lol)

    Just hang in there 'til you turn 18... I don't think you should move out of nowhere like it was suggested here by KarKingJack, but you definitely need to move... Just wait 'til you turn 18 then go to college. Your mom can't stop you from going to college lol (and when you turn 18, she actually can't stop you from anything)

    Good luck (:

    • Thank God someone finally spelled 'college' correctly! +1 just for that, lol. It was really starting to irk me.

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What Girls Said 27

  • Sounds like you have a Mom who cares very much for you and is trying to protect you. BUT she' can't keep you in a bubble. You have a right to grow up and experience life. Once you turn 18m she can't stop you from moving out. In the eyes of the law, you are an adult and can do whatever you want. You should be having SOME fun during your teenage years and am sorry you aren't -- You SHOULD be allowed to do volunteer work. I would try talking to your Mom - explain that you know she loves you and wants to protect you - but that you are also a teenager and deserve to have a little fun. Can't you invite friends over? You can't go to a movie once ina while? That is really not fair. If she does not listen - when you turn 18, find a girlfriend and rent an apartment. But DO NOT DO IT til you have a job... I would prefer you go on to school to prepare for a wonderful career - Going away to college gets you out of the house, too!) Have you thought of that? Just remember.. Your Mom is doing the best she can and is afraid for you and your safety. Sure, it' s a little "overprotective".. .but would you rather her not care about you at all? Many teens would love it if their parents noticed them once in a while.. They are free to do whatever they want and get into any trouble they want believing nobody cares about them.. That's not you, Sweetie. Hang in there. Life will imrpove.. I promise you. Hugz.

  • Just like you said: get accepted into a college far, far away and move. If your mother won't pay for it, take out loans and get a parttime job. She cannot prevent you from going to college or doing whatever you want once you're 18. Just make sure you are responsible about it (ie, pay for your own bills.)

  • once you are 18 there is not much your mom can do about it anymore because you will be a legal adult . if you still live at home with her when you are 18 she is still going to treat you like this . its best to finish school and get a job and MOVE OUT ! or go to collage like your wanting to . really intell your 18 there's not much you can do about it till then . maybe you should try to talk to your mom and tell her how you really feel WITHOUT getting into a fight . you want to be treated like an adult so have an adult convo with her meaning you don't get upset and yell at each other .

  • honey its the same for me! OK well your 17 right? you have a right to do what you want its your life you have to live it not her so sit her down and tell her everything that you hate about what she does to you, make sure she understands and doesn't say anything when your talking, I've had a friend who did that and she now has a life, and if that's doesn't work get a job, earn money and tell her stop controlling you and f*** off and move out! that's what I would do

  • when you turn 18, you are legally an adult and can do whatever you want. wait until you turn 18, then move out and there will be nothing your mom can legally do about it.

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