I think both men and women on the single scene simply learn to hate one another and a lot of the double your dating books don't help. They teach men that the only way to get a girls attention is to prove your the alpha male. I have also learnt that there are also similar books for women that tell you to never show any emotion, make him do all the chasing and play hard to get. I now think both sets of books are designed only for men who lack confidence in talking to girls and for women who are too clingy not for everyone. If your an assertive confident person anyway I learnt it actually hinders (the hard way by been told I am too pushy), just as it would for a woman who is not too clingy because if she makes him do all the chasing he will simply think she's not interested.
Moral of the story is there are a lot of good guys out there but to find him you must do three simple things:
1) Never judge a book by its cover, you can't get to know someone untill they feel they can be themselves around you rather than a sterotype based on what they read somewhere in a book.
2) Don't sleep with them untill you get to know them since there are a lot of bad guys outhere after another notch on there bed post
3)The single scene is the best place to meet the worst guys and girls only use it as a last resort. The best place is from a course, work place or social club
Well you're gonna get responses from a lot of nice guys here and I'm no exception. When people told me that I can't get a date because I'm a nice guy I thought it was baloney. Unfortunately, they were right. I'm not a nice guy to the point where I let people walk all over me but lets just say I have much more respect for women than my friends do. I still open doors, pull out chairs etc. It's the way I was raised and I'm not going to let society tell me that my parents didn't raise me properly. I'm definitely a confident guy (not meaning to brag) but it seems as though that still isn't enough. Looks as though you need to be confident and be a jerk at the same time. Either way, I'm not gonna change who I am to get a girl's interest. People should like you for who you are and not who you're not/pretending to be. People also think I'm gay because I'm 21 and I have not had a girlfriend yet (probably because I'm a good/nice guy) but it's not my fault that I'm looking for a meaningful relationship rather than one night stands and flings and FWBs.
In answer to your question, yes there are nice guys out there. You just have to look harder and give them a chance. All a nice guy needs is one chance and he can make you feel so special. I'm still waiting for my chance *sigh* :( Good Luck
haa I so know what you mean an I really want a guy that will be with me even if he knows I'm not ready to do anything serious with him. It might take a while but I think there are guys out there that will learn that there's more importance to the whole make love to you. :)
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well some of us nice guys are ignored cause girls want the over confident jerk players more ... and also "all guys" want sex with the perfect girl eventually even if they will still get married soon... just the nice ones won't leave if they give that up to a girl and we nice types mostly prefur the girl to let us know she wants to ... we don't force it. and the nice guys prefur the girl to ask us out, if I had a girlfriend that loved me I would charrish her. I would also want to try to help if she's on her period and change her pad/tampon for her and if she's in pain I would try to comfert her and hope I can help make the cramps go away etc. also id always try to ask what's on her mind
so what do you think do you consider me nice or just weird
its hard to say I'm a nice guy, I can't really judge myself. but I am quite sure I am. yes just like anyone else. if I get pushed or p*ssed off then I ain't gonna react nicely and may bring it into a fight. but that's just like anyone really. I love to make people feel good, there's no point in being an asshole without no reason, I don't see a point myself. I'm very open and honest with people but the problem with allowing yourself to be nice is sometimes it can be a disadvantage. people may feel, that is there chance to take advantage so a lot of guys tend not to show it unless they trust the person. looks like you need to do some deeper soul searching to find your right guy. we are all different though so keep looking.
Your talking to one right now. ha ha I know how you feel. I don't understand the whole bad boy concept. It really frustrates me how they play women but at the same time the girls don't exactly get rid of them...i guess they enjoy the drama. But when I see a bad boy doing his act on girls it makes me want to throw up and go sock him in the face. I have many friends who think that playing girls is awesome and they all trade stories with each other on how they got to sleep with two different girls during the week. I don't play girls... I don't think it's right at all.
Girls have hearts too...and I'm not fond of breaking them. I enjoy just being loved by the opposite sex by being myself. ya know?
Well, I'm a nice guy I'd like to think so. I refuse to have any kind of sexual relations with a women until I loved them. And you know what? It Kept me a virgin until I met the girl of my dreams. I write that girl a poem every single morning and I always bring her flowers. I do anything I can to put a smile on that pretty girls face. To me Sex is pointless without Loving the other. To me its a display of love and affection without ether its a pointless useless act. Don't get me wrong it feels good but the best part is afterward once its done the way you bond with the partner. And no I'm not gay. lol I'm a 21 year old male who just fell in love with the most perfect girl. Trust me there are more guys out there like me. Just gotta wait :) it will come.
Well I'm a nice guy I open doors from women even added a girl I liked as an authorized user on my credit card and helped her out finanicially. I drove her around when she wanted to go out drinking. Problem is doesn't seem like girls really want a nice guy as a boyfriend. Being a nice guy has just gotten me hurt and used and 25 and not able to get a girlfriend. I've just about give up. My advice is there are lots of nice guys out there just keep looking and maybe give the nice guy a chance even if he maybe comes on a little desperate or isn't the best looking or coolest guy. Good Luck.
Firstly chivalry is dead and women killed it a long time ago.
There are MANY MANY thousands of nice guys who want to have a great girl and treat her
right but girls like yourself choose not to date them. And guess what they are human too they have feelings too, they also have desires just like any other person and eventually after being rejected for many years they become bitter and realize the truth that
NO GOOD DEED GOES UNPUNISHED
and they become users and start hanging out at bars and clubs looking for sex.
I've always held women above myself I don't know why just the way my father treats my mother I've learned from him. I would like to say I'm nice but I havn't found a nice woman yet I geuss I will some day. I always feel the need to be close my girlfriend if I'm around her just to show other guys back off because I know they're not going to treat her as good as I will. I'll pretty much die for a woman if she's smart has a great personality and looks nice in my eyes.
You probably had couple nice guys showing interest in you that you friendzoned already. I don't blame you, most of them are passive aggressive sissies that think affection can be bought with doing whatever a girl wants. What I think you mean is "why can't I get a man that fucking speaks it's mind instead of agreeing with me on everything just because he wants to fuck me and still treats me like a queen?" You see, I changed the question around, because it's not about the existence of said guys, it's about your ability to showing us you are really worth the royal treatment. Just like it's a guy's responsibility to show he is "boyfriend material"
yes I am one of them and girls don't like nice guys :-(
Plenty of men are respectful and caring towards women, men also like relationships they are just choosy who they have those with.
If you want someone who holds chairs and doors for you etc.. your not looking for a nice guy, it means your a princess looking for a foot stool because this behavior has nothing to do with respect and every thing to do with putting you on a pedestal.
it has always occurred to me that the best choice of guys for girls, the ones whom hold their attention the longest, are those harboring qualities between darkness and light. A good balance, not favoring one extreme or another. That usually has a guy on a good calm, confident, state of mind regularly. Girls see that as a flexible sense of power that allows them to be themselves, but not to the point that the guy is a push over.
i am nice guy ,yet girls don't find it attractive ,they feel it as something like a weakness
i must be the most stupid guy,the girl I like hurts me and yet I am nice to her,i don't know when she will realize it
They were all killed off in high school because nobody cared for them.
Nope I'm a big meanie monster poopyhead out to destroy innocent wimminz
-_-... oi vey
the guys who are confident when approaching you didn't just learn it over night,... they obviously talked to many many women before you.. etc
I've been wondering the same thing. :/
we are out there, we just get ignored a lot
didn't you get the memo, girls like bad boys.
i've never meet such haha😁
Yes I am still virgin at 23
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