This isn't the first time this has happened to me, but it seems a guy likes me, I like him, but he never does anything about it. Of course time passes, I figure he isn't interested, I move on. By move on, I don't necessarily mean to another guy...but moved on as accepted that the guy probably didn't like me, and since he didn't do anything or enough to feed what could have been a budding relationship, I have lost feelings. THEN they start showing interest. ugh.
I mean do you guys really expect a girl to like you for a year with nothing in return that leads to actually dating?
It is funny when guys seem surprised when you move on. Is there no concept of time? I almost feel like saying...'yeah, I like you in 1998, remember?...but it is now 2010!'. :p
Ok, its not that bad, but trying to get a laugh out of some. Although we live this kind of stuff, it is almost kind of funny in some ways.
But I would like to know why the guy doesn't kick it into gear until the girl has moved on?
Not saying things can't be re-kindled, but something gets lost along the way keeping us waiting like that. :(
Actually I've had some cases where I seriously didn't like the girl until much later after we became much closer friends. I mean I can tell you that at one time I thought this girl really boring and came off as kinda cold, but then my feelings changed in exactly a year after we kept being friends and shared all kinds of experiences together. She's one of those tough outside, big softie inside types. That might be different from what you've experienced, but sometimes I feel like these issues just sorta happen, and you need to be more flexible to maybe allow the other person to warm up to you.
Just give it time, the most successful relationship I saw, it took the girl like two years to warm up to the guy. I mean, that doesn't mean freeze your life and not date anyone else, but don't write them off so quickly as, 'never going to be interested.'
Obviously if he really does like you but won't say, then he's just shy or doesn't know exactly what to do and between all of the things they could do they can't figure out what would be best and end up doing nothing while they think about it. Girls tend to put too much pressure on guys to make the moves, so honestly, if you have something in mind, go ahead and suggest it or god forbid, take the lead. Since you seem to be the one to move on first usually, you should be the first to make the moves too.
Guys have been conditioned to think women won't like or be offended by an immediate display of interest. They figure they have to hide it, become friends, and slowly work it into the dialog. They think they can sneak in under the radar and by making you think they want friendship and then elevate the relationship to a romantic one.
Well I can tell you in my case it comes from being burned pretty bad. Getting shot down isn't fun and for some it is harder to dust themselves off and try again than others. Those of us who might have had a string of bad luck can get a little discouraged and end up becoming insecure. Which totally sucks, so even though society says we need to be the initiator if you like a guy and he might seem shy or quiet, drop a few hints to help us along. And yes some times we really are retarded and you'll have to almost spell out "idiot I like you ask me out" before they either get it or grow back a pair.
why don't you get up off your vagina and just ask the guys YOU like out so you can avoid all these retard questions like "why don't THEY do all the work?" Its called equal treatment cheesypuff. You like him, YOU go get him...dont wait for him to do everything.
This is an easy one. It's fear of rejection combined with shyness. Plus, guys are much less intuitive than women. In other words, most guys need to be hit over the head with a large polo mallet (metaphorically speaking) before they realize or understand that a woman is interested.
One other thing I would note: Today, most guys are just less assertive/aggresive than years ago. There are probably a lot of sociological reasons for that, but if I'm right, it means that you have to meet a guy at least halfway (see above paragraph about hitting them over the head).
I would say quit whining about it and move on. Seriously. If you like him, make the move...quit being so chivalrous. If you don't want to make the move then find another guy who will. It's as easy as that.
I know I won't get "best answer" for this one but it's the cold hard truth. You can't expect a guy to always just be willing to ask you, he doesn't know if you'll meet him half way and plus like someone else said not all girls who flirt actually like the guy. Most girls are just natural flirts.
I think the best thing for you to do is just move on. Clearly he will not outright ask you and clearly you will not ask him...so just let it be.
rejection,we don't read minds .we are scared that we will be rejected and they will no longer like us.fear ,because if we make move right away you say we are desperate and clingy.we have to put up with flirting mind games and testing, we guys wonder if you like us or not since most girls are being friendly by the time we notice it you girls have moved on.
We think things over. were afraid of rejection we must be 100% shure you like us back. or notings happens. I dit this let a girl wait too long, in the end she rejected me! fear can mess thing up badly. but its OK too do some moves first. I don't understand why, we do this. I don't understand why the oppesite sex reject us when they like us. Maby you give us so many opertunities, and we just don't take them, becous were lazy, afraid, insecure etc. please when this guy asks you out give him a chance.
*sigh* You're either dealing with a really shy guy or a guy that respects you and isn't just trying to get in your pants right away or a combo of both. I'm basically that guy and it really ticks me off that society has taught us that women can never make the first move. There have been a few women I've lost because I didn't try to get in their pants after three dates. I know because I found out through mutual friends later that that was the reason. I did that to be respectful because women complain about men only wanting sex but obviously that backfired.
If you can tell a guy likes you but it seems like he isn't doing anything about it and you like him back just make the first move and your problem is solved.
You could always stop playing games & tell him yourself.
Its up to you. You want to wait till your next b -day to go out or not,. You want to wait around on guys who are too insecure to handle a girl telling him she likes him, so you say nothing, because you are too worried hell stop talking to you if you do- then that's your decision. Don't complain- act :)
hes shy obv reaqly likes you but finding it hard to start talking just smile at him say hi what did you do at the weekend your hurting yourself by waiting he's probibly dieing for you to say heelo go on do it it might change your life or write your number down and hand it to him and just smile don't say anything