I'm older now, and it only gets worse as you age. When I was in high school and college, it was an absolute nightmare. I was so lonely, I can remember actually being at parties in a room full of people and my body would actually ache from the loneliness. So, what was my situation? I was handsome to the point of it being ridiculous--like catalog or magazine handsome (although I had no idea). If that wasn't bad enough, I have an IQ that, depending on which test you put your trust in, is somewhere between 133 to 150. So, when I could actually get a nice looking girl to talk to me, I'd open my mouth, and within 30 seconds she'd find some reason to run away and go talk to some scary looking gorilla.
I always smiled. I was always really nice. I was excruciatingly sensitive. And I was always, always, always lonely.
It got to the point where I used to play my guitar all the time alone in my room because I couldn't get a girlfriend. I played so much guitar that I got into a band that sort of turned me into a local rock star. And the loneliness got even worse. When I walked by, girls would actually turn away with their drinks. If I tried to start a conversation, they would stare at my as if I looked like strawberry yogurt with eyes, or some hideous thing. I would walk up to a table where some of the band guys were talking to girls... and the girls would immediately shut up and look away. I felt like some sort of freak... a creature. It got to the point where, during breaks, I would just work on my guitars so I didn't have to go through the agony of being ignored, stared "through" as if I weren't there, or receive what came to be known as "the look," that inimitable stare that just seemed to scream "Why are you talking to me, please go away!"
Years later, a really nice woman named Becky explained it to me. She told me that I was terrifying--I was too handsome, too smart, too talented. Girls didn't think that they had a chance with me, so they fled. I still don't really get it because I see myself as really just an ordinary guy. I really do. It took Becky to explain these things to me in a way that sort of made sense. I didn't see what she saw.
So, here I am at middle age. Alone and wondering what the hell happened. So, all you nice girls out there, when a really handsome, nice, smart guy walks up to you and starts a conversation... please smile at him as if he's not a creature that you're afraid of. I would hate for someone to end up like me: lonely, sad, and old.
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icedice, I forgot to add that subtlety is practically second nature to women. Men are simpler and more straight forward, don't expect this from at least 60% of the women out there.
Also Look out for Bitches. A bitch is another brand of **** (misnomer woman), degenerated woman, who only tries to get the attention of movie star looks guys to pump her own ego. In turn they'll treat you like sh*t, that's why you can't be a nice guy to properly get laid with that brand of ****, if you want them. They tend to also be extremely subtle.
Concieted, damaged goods women = A BITCH, tramp or gutter slut etc etc. Distinguishable in a split second by guys like me and boy do they upset when they find out that you've seen right through them and never fall for their little traps, HAHAHAH! All snakes in the grass. More dangerous than men.
This generation has made many bitches but we still can't generalize. Individuals are different. There will always be good and bad people alike. To explain this in a nutshell for now - all the way down to the science ;) I've done a lot of stuff, quite frankly do take it from me.
A lot of guys who hit on me have some terrrrrible methods. I'm not too bad looking myself to be honest, and I say this in the least cockiest way, but a lot of times, guys who try to hit on me tend to be too pushy..or just overall creepy. I know a lot of girls who get really intimidated and are shy...but do you really want a shy/intimidated girl? Confidence is the sexiest thing. So if you say you're as good looking as you say you are and try to make the first move, you should definitely ask the girl's number if she can say more than 6 words to you...5 words might be pushin it. just joshin.
OR
you should totally force her to give you her number..or take it from her. just push her down and grab her phone. write down her number..maybe her mom's number too so you can call to confirm her hot daughter is not in the hospital. what I mean is, just ask for her number. a good way to break a girl out of her shell is to have a phone conversation. if you guys can chatter for a long period of time, she'll probably be less intimidated and voila! ask her on a date.
It's tough because as it's been mentioned: girls find really hot guys intimidating, and vice-versa. This is also because hot guys tend to be douches because they can get away with being an ass and still getting laid. I'm not saying this is your case, but it is for a lot of really good looking guys that I know.
You seem really nice though, and have genuine intentions, so I suggest finding any way to try and get into a good conversation with a girl. Random run-ins won't do it - it has to be full-blown conversations where she can see that you're smart and sweet and not just hot. That'll intimidate her more - but at least she's on her way to getting to know you better.
And the more you try to get her attention, the more she'll realize that you're into her for real.
Shame man jst believe in yourself hey and don't let shit people say of u stop u 4rm doin ur thing.jst take it as a complement if they scared of u its probably cse u so freaken gorgeous that they are scared of u jst do what I do and jst strike up a joke. U shd try ur hand at acting or even modelling with wateva job u doin 2 gain confidence like I did cse u get some people that because u look a certain way they assume u dumb, or arrogant or stuck up which is jst sad really.besides most guys that have treated me well have been really good lOokin anyway if they give u muffled tones instead of crawling back in ur shell maka joke of it and ask them what gibberish is that lol good luck
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Oh boy! So I am a girl! I personally don’t feel I am pretty enough in looks for a handsome guy to like me. I do think my personality might attract good looking people, but enough about me. I think you’ve been surrounded by people that have not taken the time to really get to know you. They’ve only seen the outside and concluded that your looks are more important and according to today’s society your looks make you an “unattainable guy” for us average looking people or you might be a jerk or conceited. It is also an immature way of looking at the world. I mentioned earlier about my own issues, I am one affected by this society where average looking girls cannot be with an above average looking guy but an average/below average looking guy can and should be with an above average looking girl, WHAT! Yeah is a common believe. I’ve heard many girls say, What is he doing with her? as if his looks make the guy too good for the girl he’s with. Bottom line: find the right people or the right people will find you😌 Aside from your looks you sound to have a nice personality and that will be what shines through. Looks fade away after getting to know someone. Be confident in what you are looking for in a partner or friends and forget about the rest! TC
The girls responses on here are not entirely honest brother. I was in the exact same shoes as you. North American girls are particularly like this. If you were in Europe the tables would be turned - hot guys getting approached even, especially ones with substance. I've lived in canada and US, US is still better than canada in this regard. Canada for example, is just as you've described but to a far greater extent than the USA even! Focus on your studies and get out of college.
College girls are low standard women. North American women have a chip on the shoulder toward handsome and with substance men. A level of backwardness but not a big deal. It's their loss. My advice - don't be a nice guy but retain your attractiveness. Girls find nice guys forgettable but in your case it's just that they're simply full of sh*t - intimidated.
Some of the girls who posted on here are not entirely honest. Takes an exceptional woman to admit they're intimidated by handsome men with character. Women are also terrified of truth.No that conclusion is probably not correct. One, they are probably shy. Its not a mind game. If you want to hit on them, try starting a conversation. So not just this non verbal gestures, actually just talk to them. They are not ignoring you, its just that if you were really interested in them, you would talk to them right? Girls need to know they are special. If you flirted with everyone, then they are not special. If you don't talk to them, they are not special. Get the idea here? it's not that they don't want to talk to you, they want special attention. It sounds like you've been acting friendly to many people or everybody, so that's never motivation for a girl to think about getting to know you, whether good lookin or not, especially with shy girls.
You must be really good looking, cause I know that I get really nervous, awkward and shy around hot men, who especially look right at me. I guess it is an intimidation thing. If I see a hot guy, I usually think, "he probably thinks I'm ugly, etc." just because you are good looking and I think I'm not at you're level.
are you sure it wasn't your mom or grandmother that you overheard talking about "how handsome a young lad you've become"?
to keep the convo going...just keep asking open-ended questions and have them talk about themselves. make sure to smile and be friendly through the convo so they get comfortable with you
Man I feel your pain I know how you feel they did the same thing to me.
They like u but they want you to show more interest.
Intimidation
scared and nervous
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