How to tell if a waitress is interested in you or if she's just looking for tips?

I'm interested in my usual server/waitress/bar keep... how do I tell if she is flirting for tips or is actually interested?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm a bartender/waitress. I don't ever flirt with my customers, but my smiling and laughing may come off like that. I tend to my customers with a positive attitude and usually with witty jokes, if it's the right crowd.

    I can understand that a usual customer might find that because she can remember your "usual" drink, or because she knows you always order an appetizer after your second beverage, it must be an interest... right? Not really.

    We like to be efficient and give you a pleasant experience while with us; that's how I am, at least. If you think she is flirting with you for a relationship, then ask her when she gets off one night and feel out her reaction.


What Girls Said 3

  • yeah...just like allll the strippers like you ;) guys are silly little bastards

  • ask her out and try your luck. you can't tell from words or flirting because that's her job


What Guys Said 6

  • Make a move.. That's about the only way you can really tell.. too many people are great at hiding their real intentions anymore.. But if you put the spot-light on her, you'll find out real quick if she's interested or not.

    And remember, just cause you are asking her out doesn't mean you're a needy guy. Nor does it mean your sold on who she is. And you should never be bashful for the way you feel. Wear it proud like a real man.

    P.s. by making a move - I'm not talking about flirting back with her.. I'm saying something simple like: "I'd like to take you to dinner." and if she responds: "I'm taken" then you can drop it by saying: "That's a terrible shame. But he's a lucky guy".. Or if she responds: "I'd like that".. then you'd know her interest is there, right from the bat.

    ~ ArtistBBoy

  • 99.9999999999% of the time, she's flirting with you to get a bigger tip. And yes, I know you'll probably say "but I think this is one of those 0.00000001% times!" It isn't. She's only attracted to your wallet.

  • If it's in question, assume she is just after a fatter tip.

  • stop leaving her tips and see how she looks at you.

  • Next time you're around her, make eye contact with her and mouth the word 'sex'.

    She either takes the bait or she doesn't.

    Remember, confidence is attractive.

    And you want her chasing you, not the other way around.

  • If she touches your d*** it's for a tip