I don't like them. I mean, it's not like I *dislike* them but it's kind of hard to be open to someone who is closed, if you can get what I mean. It feels awkward.
I remember this shy girl from a year ago in school, I was just doing my thing in class and I was in a good mood that day so I was sort of spreading the cheer so to speak and being playful and joking around, and somehow I could sense that she liked me - I was sitting in front of her and you know when you notice someone who likes you it's like you can feel their warmth radiating toward you, sort of weird but that's how it is. And then after I got that feeling she made a joke on top of a joke that I made and sort of smiled at me, so I figure - hey, great.
Well, I asked her if she wanted to go hang out and she was like "ohhh my god I can't believe *you* would want to date *me*!" (please don't ever say that, it makes me feel like you're somehow inferior to me, which is just f***ing weird!)
I was trying to relate to her and she was sort of closed off - not as engaged as I was, and it just felt like I was doing something wrong. After a while I kind of gave up.
Writing this now I realize maybe I would have gotten along with her better if I slowed down a bit and sort of gave her more room to *be* shy, and things would have worked out better.
On a more serious note, you need to know that shyness is not an inherent trait, it's learned behaviour. I've watched as my nerdy friends, both guys and girls, transform from their nerdy personas in highschool to very popular and well-liked and successful individuals once they are about completed their university careers.
In my opinion shyness is caused by an aversion to risk and a general fear of life. It's a bit of a catch-22 because you can't get over your shyness without confronting it, and it is the very act of being confrontational that defines you as a person who is anything but shy.
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You are like me. The problem with us is we like never start a convo. This is a problem. Especially at your age, and mine too, we need to try to start doing this. For me, a shy guy, I would almost rather go out with a shy girl because there is a better chance she hasn't gone out with anyone before like me. The problem is the people who haven't been out with anyone before might make good matches because they are both new to the whole thing, but the problem is people who have never been out with anyone before are usually shy.
Really really don't worry about it. I'm the same as you. As long as you're not painfully shy, then there is no problem. Shy people are often much more interesting and thoughtful, be proud of who you are. And as everybody keeps saying, shyness is a learned behaviour, if you're not comfortable with yourself, challenge yourself a bit more. Put yourself in more social situations and you should eventually at least gain a little confidence. I used to get so torn up about how shy I was, now I've learned to accept myself. Any guy that is worth bothering with should respect who you are.
dont listen to these guys who say they don't like shy girls. "its a learned behavior" and all that shit. I'm sure if you had a choice you wouldn't be shy, its not something you can help. there is absolutely nothing wrong with being shy. everyone is shy deep down inside, no one expects you to be loud and outgoing and extremely open when you first meet someone (people like that are annoying haha) it takes time to get comfortable with someone. so don't worry about your shyness. I know A LOT of guys that like shy girls, they are more interesting and mysterious.
for one they think we easy, but That's simply not a true statement. Some men enjoy exciting women that say and do what they feel like; some men enjoy the "girl toy" that he can show off, and many men enjoy a shy girl and actually by today's standards find shy girls rather refreshing. You won't be shy forever. Once you get into your later years shyness does pass and before you know it you'll be saying "no" to everything and "yes" to the things you want to do. You just haven't met the right person yet.
im the same too! totally shy at first with guys, only a lot of guys talk to me and then I become un-shy : )
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Shyness is a becoming trait, as it shows a woman (or man) to be modest, so long as low self-esteem is not at the root. If this is the case, what appears to be shyness, could merely mask a secretive nature and a propensity to hide important information from ones significant other. But, true shyness itself is not a put-off to me at all.
Are you serious I love shy girls. Lol cause I am thwe exact opposite. Football player and agressive. I prefer shy girls. There sweet and you can teach them stuff. Yea if your realy shy that's a turn on. Do you want a boy friend. I prefer your type over the other girls. Just like shy guys like aggresive girls aggresive guys love shy girls. Opposites attract.
I don't think it matters if a chick is shy or not, me being a shy guy, I can relate to that. I am very outgoing until it comes to talking to chicks that I'm interested in, than I just shut right down. I think it can be a good thing as long as you come off as shy and not stuck up.
I love 'em! They always seem way more interesting, and they usually are.
Dont make us wait to long. Try and show some signs of attraction so we don't get burned in public...
I love them more than confident, spontaneous girls! I feel a lot more comfortable being around shy girls than I do around peppy girls and I feel more attracted to them as well (that shyness gives them an aura of mystery or so I find it)
I like them because I am not afraid to be myself around them. I am a shy guy though.
Honestly. I love shy girls, I don't like any other type of girls as much
We like 'em. We'd LOVE it if they wasn't so shy...
I am the same way!
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