Why is it that black girls are the most undesirable? (For non-black guys)I'm seeing a lot of negative things being said about black women in the media (mainly online). I even saw a forum thread dedicated to how black girls are the ugliest. Sure there are racist people that will say that other races are ugly, but black girls get the most heat. I've seen a lot of black girls ask similar questions, and people just think we're imagining things. I mean, look at the marriage rates. Black women are the least married race. I've heard people say that even black guys don't want black women.
This issue is causing my already low-self esteem to plummet to uncharted territories, even though I think I'm pretty compared to most black girls but not so pretty according to regular beauty standards (if that makes sense). My school is mostly white, but the few black girls that go there don't have boyfriends, and to me they are pretty and seem intelligent. Boys aren't everything and at our young age it's better to be more concerned with our academic and career goals, but I feel so discouraged when it comes to dating (keep in mind that I live in a predominately white area).
In conclusion, I would like to know what it is about black girls that's so unattractive? (BE HONEST, answer anonymously if you must, and don't feed me any crap about "preferences" because in most cases I find that there is underlying racism behind this so-called racial preferences).
Most Helpful Guy
What is it about black girls that's so unattractive? I wouldn't know, as I am so hot for a lot black gals I know.
I do understand what this is all about though... When messing around on HotOrNot, I noticed that great looking black gals who would be an 8 or 9 in my books will tend to score a 6 or 7 (rated by predominately white male audience). There is definitely some difference between how my friends and I view the level of attractiveness for most black women. I see hot white gal, my friends see hot white gal. I see hot black gal, my friends are like, NO.
Far from holding my head up high as a white man and being uppity about the white race on how we have such high quality women among our ranks and high standards for the women we want to be with, I want to take this opportunity to call my friends out for being the morons they are. To me, it doesn't necessarily show they have great taste in gals by having the hots for women who are almost exclusively white (Asian occasionally), but it definitely shows they are missing out on a lot of great gals... Black gals!
Black ladies, many you are so very fine in my eyes.19
Most Helpful Girl
I read your question and, if you are asking for absolute honesty, I am going to tell you that I think you're insecure. I am not putting you (nor would I put anyone) down for being insecure (I am insecure too)! But there is no "truth" out there that one race is better or worse looking than another. You're getting too caught up in the nasty, racist opinions of certain people (people who, I'm sure, you'd never want to even associate with; much less respect enough to give their words creedence). There is a lot of hatred out there towards people of color and, I believe, it is easy for that hatred to be soaked up by the people themselves. You might believe it's a "fact" that black women are "less attractive" than other women (whatever that may mean to you), but it is NOT. I am not black, but I am in a very small minority being a Jew and I have felt very negative against my heritage based on what other people say about it. It was eye opening when I finally realized that their hate was now inside of me too! I just began to really love my culture and learn more about it. I finally embraced it, but other people's hate took a long while to shake off. You'll shake it off too. Black women are exceptionally beautiful, just as all women are. Love yourself. There is nothing not to love!3
What Guys Said 232 278
Let me start out by saying that I'm a mutt of mostly Western European and Hispanic, and I find black girls attractive, and I've had 2 black girlfriends.
Anyway, my explanation for why some non-blacks view black women as "less desirable" would be because they perceive the following to be true:
- A large percentage of blacks, and thus black women, are "ghetto." While there are more whites who are poor and "trashy/ghetto" than blacks in the US, the RATIO of ghetto to non-ghetto is far higher among blacks than any other demographic (because there are far more whites than blacks in the US). They don't like "ghetto" anything, and blacks are more likely to be that way.
- Part of the "ghetto" issue is that promiscuity is far higher in such cultures, which is a negative to people who didn't grow up with ghetto values.
- Many people grew up in very homogeneous neighborhoods, and so they aren't used to being around blacks, or anyone very different from their own race. Thus, their standards of beauty reflect what they are most familiar and comfortable with. Dark skin, kinky hair, and exaggerated curves seem out of place to them, simply because they aren't used to it. Similarly, a white American will look very out of place in Japan, for the same reason (very homogeneous).
- Many whites are afraid that if they try to date black women, black men will get angry and become violent with them, which does sometimes happen.
- Black culture can be quite different from white culture, and many people may think they just won't have enough in common to date. They may not date others who have/maintain a strong, separate culture either.
- Some are simply racist.
You'll never win over everyone, but IMO, if you present yourself as a person of respect and integrity, and let people get to know your personality, I think you'll overcome most of the people who initially are skeptical or wary.9
God made black women first, and made the rest outta what was left over! I'm a white guy, but I wouldn't even consider dating, or marrying, anyone but a black woman. Maybe I'm all wet, but I find in most black women a great amount of inner strength yet a certain unique sensitivity or vunerablility. It's hard to explain, but it's there in Aces. For what ever reason, I just feel more at ease, more comfortable, with black people in general. I'm one of only two white guys at my church of over 300, but I'm always treated as jan equal. Actually, I may get a little more attention, as folks don't want me to feel like a minority. LOL16
Hey, what about the black guys? I read somewhere over half marry non-African Americans...4
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Does a majority really believe black girls to be unattractive?:-o
I've also seen unattractive black girls of course, but in general they're pretty. All other things (kindness, intellect, her tastes and interests) being the same, I would prefer a black girl. (I'm white and happily married to a white woman in an area with 95% or so white people. When we met it was 100% white. Europe, you know...) To be completely honest, I'd rather bite(very softly!) in black skin than in white skin. Just more appetizing.5
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I do not have a lot of experience with black females. I have only seen two of them in reality, for the place where I live in does not have a lot of them (or at least there aren't many black people around here in this city at all.)
However based on that experience and what I see from the television, it is true - I really don't like black girls physically. I can safely say this is because of the high level of racism that has been around for a long time. Therefore it just does not match my ideal for a girl to have black skin. (In fact, I tend to find the whiter the more attractive, I also have issues with tans and natural summer brownness, but that is just my pickiness.) I'm used to white. We have this saying around here jokingly: "I'm not a racist or anything, but the human skin color is white." We say that as a joke, but it does sort of stay with your expectations.
And if there are two other really dumb reasons, one of them is that they usually have giant lips which I do not like, and the second is that the experience I've had was ghetto-ish.
"i jst dnt understand...perfect ryt nw would b if you were here makin me laugh and stuff"
And she types like that! How can anyone type like that? Ugh.
So that's basically it.4
Imo, I feel that black women are the most harshly stereotyped people (race + gender) in this country. For some reason, the masses tend to believe the small sample of black women that he/she interacted with in their lives, or seen on TV, embodies ALL black women. :-X
Sure, there are definitely some black women that I find un-datable...but then again, there are many women that I would find un-datable, regardless of race.
I'm very attracted to black women. I love the physical features of a black woman. I usually go for the thicker ones, since I'm a big guy.
I like their mental strength. I need a woman like that because I can tend to dominate a recessive person. However, she has to be feminine (as in "girly") at the same time. Nails done, makeup, feminine clothing style, effeminate demeanor, etc.
Since I'm a pretentious college graduate (lol), she needs to stimulate my mind in an intellectual manner. I'm quite an analytical person, so I need someone who can mentally "hang" with me.
I'm in love with a cutesy, smart, dark-skinned, thick & effeminate black woman. I'm lucky to have her. :)14
I know I'm not who you are asking this question to, but I may know...
I think its something to do with the image black women portrait.
I love y'all very much, and I know the other females in other races aren't perfect, but some of the things we put up with is just uncalled for.
As far as y'all being unattractive to the males of other races...
Thats tough, because to me other females are always trying to obtain the features that come natural to you.
So I really think you have the wrong idea.
Yeah you'll find some people with foolish opinions, but don't let it make you think most of them don't want you, because you are very desired!
Don't let it offend you that chose to miss out on such a female of high quality.
Good Luck in your research of trying to find out why...
A Loving Black Man12
That’s a fascinating question.
I guess it comes down to biology. We are just socializing mammals, and for most of human existence, we’ve only lived in small groups. It’s only been in the last 10,000 years or so (a mere blink of the eye in geological timescales) that we’ve started to live in gatherings of more than a few hundred. Back then every group was competing for the same resources, so it made evolutionary sense to be wary of strangers. If somebody wandered into your village, who looked different from your people, they were considered a threat.
So we are genetically predisposed to be attracted to people who look somewhat like us. And to fear those who are different.
In more recent times we’ve been forced to live in bigger and bigger groups and during the last hundred years, in far more diverse groups. Which means that a lot of us have managed to overcome that predisposition,
Personally, I am a white guy living in a very multi-cultural city. I consider myself to be very liberal, and have friends from all races. I have seen plenty of beautiful Black women, Asian women, Mediterranean women, Arabic women... And I recognise their beauty. But I’m not sexually attracted to it.
But there’s absolutely no denying that deep down inside my brain, that I find girls who look like me more attractive than girls who don’t.
I’m sure that black guys find black girls hotter than others
And Asian dudes dig on Asian chicks.
That’s not to say that some people can’t overcome this programming –thank goodness they do. It makes the world a far more interesting place.
Unattractive?... I have known many black (and white women) in my time. When I went to school, I even dated a few ladies, who happened to be black. And I can tell you this: In our cruel world, there are some hard truths, and one of these is the whole race issue.
But as far as I am concerned, I never judge any person on this basis. If I liked a girl, it was because she was hot. I don't care if she was white, black or purple. I think race, unfortunately gets too much attention in our Society.
For instance, who Doesn't like Denzel? He's one of the greatest actors of our time. Yet, I can't stand some of these rapper-punks, because they are not gentleman.
What kinda guy can't admit that Ms. Beyonce Knowles isn't just delicious?! My God, I would give my right arm to share a pair of whiskeys with her...
On the other hand, Paris Hilton? Are you freakin' kidding me? The woman looks like she got hit in the ass with a shovel!
No, it's all about class, not skin color. I say beauty is in the eye of the beholder. And I like to occasionally steal a glance or two at a healthy, sexy young black chick, when my wife isn't lookin...16
I think black women are beautiful, including really dark black women. I love the way their mouths look, the way the top lip flattens against their teeth when they smile. I love the roundness of a black woman's butt and the width of her hips, although that is not universal. There are some black women that are flat as boards and there are really curvy women from all different races.
There are some things that many black women do to their appearance that are not attractive, and I think most white men would agree with me. Really long fake nails are gross. I look at them and all I can think about is whether it's possible for you to wipe your ass without getting fecal matter stuck underneath them. Plus they just look unattractive.
Hair is another thing. Fake hair is unacceptable. Chemical warfare hair is okay, but it looks like it would be unpleasant to touch. It also looks like you wouldn't let me touch it, because it has to last. Natural, relaxed hair looks really good. It hides your high forehead rather than accentuates it, and it just looks easier to deal with. I can imagine myself kissing you and running my hand up your neck and into your hair. Moreover, I just like the way natural, springy, semi-afro hair look on black girls.
Also, curvy does not mean fat. Curvy means that your butt and hips are large in proportion to the rest of your body. A round ass and wide hips, aren't the same as the huge ass and have-to-turn-sideways-to-get-through-the-door hips that go along with thunder thighs and an enormous belly.
Another thing is that many white men are intimidated by black men. Many black men act just a little harder and a little more macho than many of us. I'm speaking in general terms here, but I think what I'm saying is often accurate. And black men are just a little bigger than we are too as far as penis size goes. The Lifestyles condom survey indicates that the average black man is half an inch longer than the average white man, which really isn't much, but a lot of white guys have this image of black p*rn stars with enormous penises. Louis CK made a joke about this on his television show. He was asking out a black woman on the subway and he said, "I know that, compared to black men, white men must seem a little gay," and the black girl just looks at him and nods. It was hilarious. A lot of white men look at black girls, and see a long line of well endowed, tough, black men who came before, and it's a hard act to follow. It's our loss. Really speaking from a cold, numerical perspective, with the numbers at which black guys date white girls, an adventurous white man should be able to clean up.
I've crushed on black women! White women, too.
One attractive trait you possess is academic excellence and career goals.
You write well. Easy to understand with correct word usage and punctuation.
I was a reserve police officer. One of the officers (male) that I patrolled with had this "Joke of the day." One of the jokes was:
What is wrong with a nice, well adjusted, black couple?"
There's a fat blond somewhere, crying her eyes out.1
Not at all I am a white guy think that black girls are so sexy and many of my friends do as well don't know were you are living at all.3
Because people like those who like, or seem to like, them. Most white guys have the same problem that most black women on here have: they believe that the other isn't interested. If you show a white guy (or any guy of any race) that you're interested, then, if he's attracted, he will ask. Now, it might take longer for him to get the hint than it would for a black guy, and you may have to be more direct, because for a while he might believe that it's all in his head and you're just being nice, but he should eventually get it.3
Guys, like girls, have their individual ideas of what they find attractive in the opposite sex. As for me, being a Black man, I have dated Black women and can honestly say that the stereotype of Black women being "ghetto fabulous" is not true. Yes there are some who fit the criteria, but I know it doesn't fit the mold for the women I dated. When I was dating black women, I tend to go for the light skinned educated Black woman. Unfortunately, many other Black men seem to go after these type of Black women as well (light skinned.) Many of the Black women I dated often knew this and it created a "diva" like mentality and they often milked it for what it was worth. Once I realized that dating this type of woman was more about how much you were willing to spend on them and not about the romance, I decided to expand my dating pool to other races. I dated White, Hispanic and Asian women, all which have their own set of positives and negatives. I also know that people think Black women have attitudes and other women don't. Let me educate you guys on a little something. If you piss off any woman, she will make it known she is unhappy, though some Black women tend to be a little louder, more confrontational and combative when doing it. Point is all women, and men have attitude. Its part of our personality traits. It just may take a little more to set some of us off than others, but its there.
When I started dating other women besides Black, I found that I saw physical facial features I love in each ethnic group. Don't get me wrong, I think each ethnicity has beautiful women within it, but for the features I was drawn more, led me to lean more toward foreign ethnic women, mostly Asian and Hispanic.
As I see it, with all I have learned I decided that if all women can possess attitude, I wanted to go for the woman who possessed the most facial features I am attracted to. I tend to love women who don't require or use excessive make-up, don't wear contacts to change the color of their eyes, wear their own natural nails instead of the cosmetic nails and wear their own natural hair, instead of weaves.
My best friend, who is also my girlfriend, now fiancée and soon to be wife is Asian and I would ever consider dating anyone else as she completes me. not only does she possess the facial features I love, but our personalities are so close to each other naturally, that we seldom have disagreements.
The bottom line is, since there is beauty in everyone, you need to seek out what makes you look and feel most beautiful about yourself. Once you find that, your esteem will rise and that will resonate to those around you. You can't expect for others to find you beautiful if you have low self esteem. Find what makes you happy and let that be your baseline. It will also help you find out who is most important to you because those who don't like it won't like you any better or worse and those who do will be more than glad to be around and court you6
Well, you said to don't feed you crap about preferences, but in my case it is the truth.
I prefer the european beauty, so mostly white girls...
But as you asked for a reason, and I don't want to sound racist, which I am not, actually I lost my virginity with a black girl (that was probably unnecessary to say, but ok...), what I really dislike in black women is the nose, the large nose I mean and MAYBE and JUST MAYBE the hair, because if the girl knows how to uses her hair with style, there is no problem too... besides that, I see no problem in black women... I even have a theory that black girls have a facility to keep their body in shape, I obviously don't have any statistics or stuff like that, it's just my impression... Of course maybe that's just because I live in Brazil, so here I see lots of black girls and most of them with perfectly attractive bodies :)0
Funny thing is you asked the question and said the answer... MEDIA.
If you tell a lie long enough, loud enough and often enough, the people will believe it.-------Adolph Hitler.
Check out what the media says about black girls, hell remember the white girl that got missing in aruba or some place like that, look at all the media coverage, but I promise you if that girl would have been a black girl, she wouldn't have got nearly as much media coverage, why, because it's understandable if a black girl would run away from home, but a white girl, God Forbid...she came from a good home, she did this and did that, oh and by the way she was beautiful...thus indirectly, people will see this and decide that beauty looks like this. Beauty is in the eye of the camera.
They're not the least attractive. But you're talking about a predominantly white nation having a preference towards predominantly white women.
It's interesting all the generalizations about black women. A lot of such generalization, like the attitude or the weight, come from how black Americans are socialized by each other and the media. They are still recovering from a past so traumatic is sends ripples through the entire race.
But it's rather ironic to generalize blacks: Nearly all of the genetic variety in the human species is in Africa and in blacks around the world. Europe, for instance, is the most genetically-homogeneous continent on the planet. The Germanic nations even more so.
So you can expect that white people would have a preference for white features. And TBH, the stereotypical black woman (Loud-mouthed, KFC-eating, finger-waving, generously-sized woman.) repulses me to no end. But since when were all black women like that?
Here are some women I find quite attractive:
Not as much physically, but I think she's awesome.
To finish it off, I have a question for women, then. What do WOMEN have against Asian men? Asian men seem to be viewed as the least desirable men.
I've heard enough times "How did that Asian guy end up with a white girl? Like THAT can ever happen." To which I reply "Okay, sure...but they get Asian women!"3
its going to sound racist, because it is. my idea female image is slender with a tight rear and small chest. reverse that image and you have the general black women shown by the media and usual films. I live in n.h., and here we don't have much ethnic diversity, so any other races seem truly exotic, and not all of us like exotic. I don't dislike AA women, they just don't excite me4
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I can't tell you this isn't true for a lot of people but it isn't true for me I am European mostly also a little bit Asian and I find a lot of black girls attractive both African American and Somalian or other countries. I have crushes on lots of African Muslim girls at my school I love the dresses they wear and the hijab and I find a lot of them to be very smart and nice even if they tend to be more religious than most of the people I hang out with. I don't think its accurate to say black girls are the ugliest. To be honest I am not very attracted to white girls myself some are but in general not my preference. I am a very tan European guy partly Gypsy and I'm kind of a nerd so a lot of white people left me out of their social groups but a lot of black people accepted me as a friend and a lot of black girls have had crushes on me while a lot of white girls seem to treat me like I am a freak. So in general I have found African people both male and female to be more friendly with strangers and less judgemental which makes a lot of sense. Races vary a lot some black girls are very curvy some skinny just like all the other races. I tend to be drawn to curvy girls I am dancing around this so I'm just gonna come out and say this I like big butts I cannot lie on a girl of any race but a lot of African girls have them. As for hair I love peoples hair to be what its supposed to be. If you are Norwegian with long blond hair be proud its beautiful. If you are Latina/Native wear that long black hair don't die it. If you are African with black curly hair be proud wear braids or an afro, I have noticed different African people grow different kinds of hair because just like in Europe people in different countries of the same race look a little different. I wish less black girls got their hair straightened to try to look more white. I am not gonna say straight hair isn't beautiful because it can be but curly hair is beautiful too and no one looks beautiful trying to be someone they're not. The guy ChaosPrefect sounds kinda racist assuming all black girls act a certain way its not true. But the small percentage of African girls that do act way to stereotypical hip hop ghetto are annoying and frankly hard to talk to. I can understand most black slang but not if its said really really fast. Yet again racism means a lot of white men don't think of black girls as marriage material but that doesn't mean they don't think your sexy they just want to exploit black women for sex only. Just remember its really racist people who are missing out not you. As for me I have dated black latino and white women and would definitely consider marrying a black girl if that's where things led. I know that's not really an answer to your question but If Ihad to guess it would be not that black girls are considered in any way less beautiful or sexy just that because of racism some of white men don't even consider black women for serious relationships. Their loss6
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Think about your question this way:
Problem #1: You think that women of African descent are ugly.
My Solution: There have been 8 African American Mrs.USA winners and there are approximately 309,834,000 people in the USA as of 2010 so they can't be the least attractive race.
Problem #2: School is predominantly white
My Solution: Interracial relationships take much more commitment than other relationships, so you will more than likely have trouble in that effort.
Problem #3: African women least married race
My Solution: Think about it like this, the African predominant countries are for the most part in the third world. For them food is more important than making their relationship official.3
But anyway today I met the sweetest girl and she happened to be black. Of course due to my perpetual shyness towards any female of the human species...after all the flirting and question asking, all I did was shake her hand and tell her "you are so nice" and walked away. She was a true ray of sunshine in my usual gloomy cloud covered day. lol. Yep, I;m a dick sometimes. sad but true.5
ohh how strange, I know a lot of white guys that like black woman only and they complain that they get shot down a lot by black woman. what a strange world we live in eh?
I say don't have that idea in your head that somehow you are inferior to this or that. Be yourself and you'll attract a guy that best suits you, don't occupy your thoughts on who you think shouldnt/couldnt/wouldnt like you.
the irony of me reading this question is: I see an ad for an interacial dating service called: afro-romance and there is a sexy black woman with a half naked white dude in the ads photo. No lie, very ironic.5
I think in general most people are attracted to people that look similar to themselves. Of course there are tons of exceptions, but as a general rule I think that holds. This probably holds true in terms of the way we act and the like also. I don't mean to stereotype all black people because I know there is a large diversity, but for many there is a distinctive black culture. For most people today I don't think it is a conscious racism, just that it is natural to be more attracted to people we see and think are the same as us.
You noted in your question and I think it is accurate that media portrayal of beauty standards has something to do with that--even black models seem to have more "white" characteristics (Tyra Banks, Vanessa Williams, Rihanna, etc.).
The marriage thing has a lot to do with history and policy that have led to single mothers being more common than among other racial groups. Under slavery marital unions were often broken up among slaves for business and other reasons. In more modern times the former welfare laws contributed to higher rates of single mothers. Up until welfare reform happened under Bill Clinton it was much more difficult for a family to obtain welfare assistance if there was a man in the house. And because of socioeconomic issues it was not uncommon that black men were not able to obtain and maintain high enough paying jobs to adequately support a family. These factors provided incentives against getting married.
I think the history of racism does also hold some sway as far as interracial marriages are concerned. Just two generations ago interracial marriages were strongly discouraged in many areas of the country. It takes at least 2-3 generations for those kinds of ideas to change.
If it means anything from a self-esteem point of view, I dated black girl and I find many black women very attractive. I would date more if I hadn't already met and married the love of my life (who happens to be hispanic).0
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I had a crush on a black girl once. Just as I was about to ask her out, she got a job in another country and moved away! Damn. Anyway, just thought I'd throw that in there.2
I don't find this venue to be a place that is going to be very affirming for any WoC. And I recommend you surround yourself with people who see you as beautiful just as you are. Below I recommended one site called "Racialicious" and there are so many more: The Feminist Texican, Womanist Musings, and all the blogs they link to. I would never send any of my Black woman friends here! I find this place generally too white-dominated.7
I haven't been around many black women that was my age to start with. In my school there was only 1 black boy and no black girls until the middle of the 8th grade. They never got treated any differently and color was never an issue. We all hung out together, played ball and went to the school dances...I even danced with her. They was both cool as hell to hang out with. I am still friends with both of them.
After school the few black women I have talked to or been around in my age group was rude, loud, ghetto and obnoxious. I wouldn't have given them the time of day, but it is due to the they act and not their color...I would ignore any girls that acted that way. On a sexual level I don't like big boobs and most of the black girls I have known my age have really big boobs. I mean really big...watermelon size.1
Perhaps because black women are substantially more violent towards their boyfriends and husbands than the other way 'round.
A study of FBI statistic found that of all racial or ethnic groups, black men are the *most* likely to be killed by a spouse [Mercy, J. A., & Saltzman, L. E. (1989). "Fatal violence among spouses in the United States, 1975-85" American Journal of Public Health, 79, 595-599.]
A 1985 study [Hampton, R. L., Gelles, R. J., & Harrop, J. W. (1989). "Is violence in families increasing?" A comparison of 1975 and 1985 National Survey rates. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 51, 969-980] found that black women exhibit three times the rates of violence towards their partners, compared to white women.
More recent studies found that black women are more likely to attack their boyfriends/husbands than the boyfriends are to attack their wives/girlfriends. [Caetano, R., Schafter, J., Field, C., & Nelson, S. M. (2002). "Agreement on reports of intimate partner violence among white, Black, and Hispanic couples in the United States." Journal of Interpersonal Violence, 17, 1308-1322.]
or [Clark, M. L., Beckett, J., Wells, M., & Dungee-Anderson, D. (1994). "Courtship Violence among African-American college students." Journal of Black Psychology, 20 (3), 264-281.]
or [DeMaris, A. (1992). "Male versus female initiation of aggression: The case of courtship violence." In E. C. Viano (Ed.), Intimate violence: interdisciplinary perspectives. (pp. 111-120). Bristol, PA: Taylor & Francis.]
or [O'Keeffe, N. K., Brockopp, K., & Chew, E. (1986). "Teen dating violence." Social Work, 31, 465-468.]
or [Rouse, L. P. (1988). "Abuse in dating relationships: A comparison of Blacks, Whites, and Hispanics." Journal of College Student Development, 29, 312-319]
or [Sorenson, S. B., Upchurch, D. M., & Shen, H. (1996). "Violence and injury in marital arguments: risk patterns and gender differences." American Journal of Public Health, 66 (1), 35-40]
or... you get the idea.
By the way, it's not just black girls who are more likely to attack their partners. Hundreds of studies show women tend to use more physical aggression than men do in dating:
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There's nothing wrong with black girls at all, physically. In fact the way their bone structure is, it makes their curves generally more pronounced and gives the illusion of a toned physique even if there really isn't one, and that's sexy. My problem is with the uneducated-sounding way most of them seem to talk, and don't get me wrong I've known lots of white girls who talk that way too but honestly I could NEVER date a girl who talked that way. That and, to be honest, there is a stereotype about black girls that may or may not be true but I'm a little weary of it, the fact that they generally have bad attitudes. Yes I know, its bad to listen to stereotypes and I shouldn't be, but this one just gets to me for some reason.
But yeah, if I ever met a black girl who spoke in a way that made her sound educated and didn't seem to have the "attitude" commonly associated with black girls, I wouldn't really pay attention to the fact that she was black at all.4
Let me first say I am not racist.
I also do not find "black girls" attractive.
Alright.. I'm not saying I don't find most attractive. There are very few if any that I can say I find atractive. But the same istrue for me for asain girls.
Im only talking about looks though.
When it comes to personality and adittued. I usally don't like the way they tend to act. However I'm sure that they don't all act the same way but I have yet to find one that isn't annoying, loud and obnoxious and rude.
Say what you want but I personally find it very difficult to find black woman that I find attractive.
I'm sure that this isn't true in all places, but in my school all of the black girls hang out with the dumb "gangsters" and I am not interested in that type of girl. I know not all black girls are like the ones in my school, but whenever I see one I unconsciously group them with the dumb gangsters just because that's what I'm used to seeing. Although I know stereotyping is wrong, these stereotypes are there for a reason. Just try and distance yourself from that crowd. Try to get to know people better so they can see what your really like, and people will look past those stupid stereotypes.0
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Oh honey, don't let this get to you. I think you need to understand that there is a difference for a man between being attracted to a woman physically and being attracted to a woman where you want to date her.
Some of the white guys around you would loss their minds at the thought of having sex with you. Men love variety. They really are curious what all women look like naked. So a man can be immensely attracted to a woman, regardless of race, but he may not ever pursue a relationship with her.
Men hate rejection. Women do too but men have to face it more since they are the ones asking out the other person. So what happens? Men become very logical about what choices they have to make. A guy may see you, think you are beautiful, but logically he thinks you only date black guys or their is a "cultural difference" (even if you grew up in the same culture) or he thinks that you may not be attracted to him. Men go for women they think they can get. Black women are very hard for most men to approach because they are stereotypically strong, confident, ball busters. And a lot of men, especially those in white culture, don't know how to handle it.
A perfect example of this is my best friend and her sister. They are half black and live in a white community. Everyone says they look alike so physically they really aren't too different. And before you assume they are both models, they aren't. They are both pretty but average also. But my friend has been asked out by white men, Mexican men, black men, and Asian men. And she is currently with a Jewish guy. While her sister has never been asked out. Why? Because my friend is sweeter in personality. She is kind and gentle and compassionate. When we go out together, I just see her flash that sweet smile and those doe eyes at a guy and he melts. He doesn't care if she is purple, you can tell he is thinking up how he can pick up on her cause he thinks he has a chance now. But her sister is a hard ass. Guys are afraid to ask her out.
I'm not saying you should change your personality. Just understand that a lot of the guys that know you may think you would never date them in a million years even if they find you stunning.
So hang in there. One day a guy who is brave enough will step up.0
I'm white, and I've seen many black girls whose beauty I envied. But any man who would not date a woman based on her appearances alone is shallow.
I've noticed something about the black community, however, and I don't mean to generalize--many times, it seems that black women are viewed in a more demeaning and less respectful way by their own families and communities, with young girls being raised with the mentality that they have to catch a man and keep him happy. This is somewhat less true for whites. Again, I'm generalizing, and correct me if I'm wrong. But I'm a salesclerk and I see and deal with all kinds of people. I've seen black men treat their girlfriends like they were lucky to have any kind of male attention at all. This is as much her problem as it is his. Her acceptance of his treatment of her just perpetuates it.
For an intelligent, educated, and pretty black woman such as you seem to be, you should not have any problem finding someone who values you for who you are.
One last thing--for every rule, there is an exception. For instance, it's thought that most men prefer women with big breasts. And maybe they do, but that isn't stopping the millions of small-breasted women in the world from finding people who love them and value their beauty. So even though you may think that many men find black women unattractive, there are just as many men who think they're beautiful--or who, most importantly, judge women on an individual basis rather than as a group.5
Like some people say, they might not have ever dated anyone who is outside of thier race, or maybe even black girls. They could be intimidated. They might thing that you aren't interested in them. I am sure that you have a couple of white guy friends in school. Why don't you ask them if they find you attractive or if they would ever consider dating you. :))0
Ok I'm going to be completely honest with you now and I don't want any hateful comments. I'm black (Nigerian) and I live in a predominantly white area that is adjacent to a really diverse area. I also go to a predominantly white school. I think the reputation of black women has been tainted. We are seen in such a negative light because of the way we are portrayed in the media. Shows like Jerry Springer and Maury make us look like we are promiscuous and low down and also unintelligent. Also, have you noticed how movies always show black people in the ghetto or show black women as saying things like "um hmm sister girl" "oh no he didn't" and rolling their heads and smacking their teeth. It's ignorance and people that don't really understand black people are going to say and do things because of what they've seen from a few black people. The media also has a greater affect on people than they know. I think it really depends on the people you are around because I'm black but I get attention from all color guys and I like guys of all different races including my own. It's just the way things are in the world you're always going to get the ignorant people and the more open minded.
Also, it's the way some black girls act that causes them to be seen that way honestly there are some black girls that don't know how to act and people seeing that makes everyone think we are the same. I advise you to do what makes you happy and date whoever makes you happy. I know a whole bunch of white girls my friends included who are single so it's not just black girls (I blame it on the guys of today but whatevs haha). I definitely wouldn't judge all black girls because of what a handful do. It all depends on who raised you and where you were raised. Black girls usually have the hardest lives and go through a lot so they sometimes come off a little stronger than others. They don't mean to but you are a product of your environment. I'm Nigerian so I wasn't really taught to act the way other black girls around me usually do and I also live around a lot of white people so I'm also a product of my environment.
Don't feel bad about how you look because of your skin color because let me tell you black is beautiful. If you carry yourself well, take care of yourself people notice no matter what color you are and if their are racists then screw them they don't matter because they're stuck in a fantasy world where they haven't realized that yeah there are other races other than mine and they are no different than mine it's ignorance that's in these people and that's the way they will always be. Do what's best for you and celebrate being black because that's part of what makes you beautiful : )1
I think that's ridiculous to say an entire group of people are ugly. Everyone looks different. Of course there are similarities. Black women have their assets just like any other race. Full lips, dark eyes, curvy figure. That sounds like today's ideal beauty to me. And I wouldn't worry about fitting in with the ideal beauty anyway, we all know they are impossible standards. What's more ideal is to accept our own beauty, no matter what.
I've not experienced this thing about black women not being as beautiful. Partly because I'm white, so I'm just oblivious to it. But maybe being in a predominately white area they see you as different and unfamiliar and are afraid. When you are at a point in your life to move, look for a place with lots of diversity, you will find accepting people that won't think being black is so different.
My best friend in college was a black girl and she preferred white men. And we noticed that typically white men see black women as "exotic". And she had many dates and boyfriends, but rarely long term relationships because these men were looking to get to have sex with "the black girl".
I really have no clue why all this is, but I wanted to give my most honest answer. I'm sorry you have to experience this, I think black women do have a hard role to play in life, and it makes them stronger and more independent and perhaps superior women.2
well my boyfriend, who is white, has told me many stories about being with black girls sexually and relationship wise, and he just tells me that black girls have a smell to them that make them unattractive, all of them, not bad hygeine, or anything like that, its just black women, that is it. I don't know if this is answering your question, or anything, but I'm just telling you what I know. or what he supposedly knows. but he grew up in st. louis and grew up with mainly all black women and men. sooo...yeah. that's all I have to say.1
oh good god. girl with your self esteem you really shouldn't have asked this question. I can definitely relate to how you're feeling. I'm a black girl (half white though) and I went to predominantly white schools and I remember feeling the exact same way. once I learned more about our history in this country, racism, blacks in the media, etc. I started to love myself more because I understood things a bit better. I have dated several white guys but I'm not so foolish to think most of them are into black girls. a hell of a lot of them are not attracted to us.
you can see the racism in like half the answers on this page girl. that should speak loudly enough for you to understand that not everyone is on the same level mentally and ignorance is like a cancer pretty much killing one mind at a time when it comes to race and culture. do not obsess over this because it will break you. I know. the thing you have to accept is that there is virtually nothing you can do about it. just be yourself. sure, present yourself well enough but don't feel like every action has to be a direct contradiction to the stereotype held high for us. I'm very loud. I know this is a stereotype but its how I am and I'm not going to change that just because a bunch of ignoramuses think we are the loudest. if there aren't any white guys who like you for you then you'll just have to accept that. I'm sure one will though. almost all my black girl friends are or have dated white guys. no kidding. one of my black friends is obsessed with asian guys and dates them like crazy. I've seen it all really.0
Don't believe that crap sweetheart! I am a black girl and I have dated outside of my race and inside of my race and every guy I've dated has thought that me and my friends were all beautiful. I even dated a white guy that had never dated a black girl before and he said his whole opinion on black women changed and we are still friends to this day! Yes, society dictates that black women are "less pretty" but I 100% disagree. What about the Angela Basset's and the Sanaa Lathan's or the Halle Berry's? Gorgeous black women! I could go on and on! This one black guy (and he is fine as all get up) that I've been seeing has dated white women, asian women, hispanic women you name it, and he told me that the only reason why a lot of men are intimidated by black women is because you have to come at us in a "real" way. Meaning, we usually see right through all the crap they try to give and so you have to come corrected. He said that's the fun part though because you do have to be on your A-game. Feel proud of who you are.I am not "ghetto" at all. I was raised by both parents in a suburbian home, went to college and am proud of who I am. I went to a mainly white college but white guys still talked to me because I exuded confidence. When you are confident and secure in your beauty ANY guy will want you. I think all women are beautiful (every race) and black women are in that list as well! Keep your head up sweetie! :-)1
Sweetheart be proud of your culture...forget the asses that believe black women aren't attractive. I guarantee you that America is probably the only place in the world where you would be considered ugly. Black women have been known for being strong and somewhat domineering in your homeland but considering everything and the fact that they had to fight for everything then it is to be expected.
Where I live in the Caribbean being a black women is more than the colour of our skin, here we are intelligent, gentle but firm when need be, wonderful life partners, proud mothers, leaders of countries, doctors, lawyers, humanitarians, teachers, artistes in every sense of the word and a beautiful people. Ignore them and remember that you come from a long line of women just like that.
Not everywhere in the world is the standard for beauty long straight hair, a straight nose, thin lips, coloured eyes, fake breasts, skinny hips, collegen and a flat bottom.1
I have to admit that there are some very truthful, honest and educated comments regarding this question. So instead of repeating what has alreaady been said I will just comment on something that I do not believe has been brought up. Yes, most the peopleon this site may not be racist BUT their parents grew up in a different time and they may be. Most people care what their parents think and I have experienced white men that like me and think I am beautiful but have told me straight up they couldn't see bringing a black girl home to their families. For some reason Asian women are acceptable but not black or hispanic to bring home to mom.0
I know many Caucasian males who prefer Black Women. What I think is sad, is that you're desperately trying to get the attention of Caucasian males. I understand there is a shortage of African American males in your school, but this should not plummet your self-esteem. Maybe the men in your school choose to date women within their race. It's not always a bad thing. Do not take it too personal. Another reason why you probably have not attracted a White male is because you are thinking about it too much! I am a Black Woman. I have never been in a relationship with someone outside my race...but I have always been approached by White males. But if they didn't approach me, my self esteem certainly would not plummet!2
i think you should watch White Chicks to compare blond dumb bitches to african american girls who tend to say "I'M GONNA BUST YO MUTHAF()CKIN ASS", and see which one is more approachable and therefore more desirable xD
But yet, there are many black girls that are very beautiful and desirable in this industry.
Look at Halle Berry and Beyonce for example. They are beautiful, gorgeous and sexy women that men of all nationalities drool over.
I also think that Alicia Keys is very beautiful, but she is half white.
What do most of these women have in common? They have class.
Thanks to comedians and tv, the media has portrayed african american women to be ghetto, and unmannered people.
I believe that there are A LOT of intelligent, talented and or beautiful african american girls there, and if you let it shine through, you'll be very desirable.
Being black is not a factor in what men seeks as a partner. I've seen many black people hanging out with whites and having white boyfriends.
therefore I think its also based on the culture and who you hang out with. If you hang out with your own race, you are definitely going to date someone black. Chinese date chinese if chinese people is the only race they hang out with. However, if you mix with the whites, chances are very high that you will date a nice caucasian male.
I don't think black girls are ugly, just like every other race, some white bitches are fugly lol Chinese, mexican, it don't matter all races have somewhat an ugly person... but I'm white, my ex who is also white told me him and his new girlfriend wanted to come kick it so I was like sure whatever, and he texted me like "She is black, don't be racist!" PFT as if I'm racist! he goes around calling his own "white" mom a Ni****. so this girl and him show up and DAMN, This girl was way pretty for a black girl, It just depends, take good care of yourself, your skin, and you are just as beautiful. Every race has their own unique qualitys that make them beautiful!1
im part black and I just want to say thank you for this question. I don't usually have a problem attracting the guys I want but I know it is an issue - narrow views on beauty and racism toward us. seriously though this question is astounding. I've never read so much anti-black women bashing and open racism in one place in a long time. bravo kids lol it really just shows you how far off we are from being the post racial utopia some people think we live in. racism is very real and in the hearts of many (dare I say most?) people who wouldn't usually admit to it in person. so that's why we have the internet :D
i think european standards of beauty and the degrading of african beauty is at the heart of it. its everywhere. nappy hair? fix it? darker skin? ew. p*rn allows men to examine womens bodies easier and see the image of sexiness being promoted I think. also racism in the form of stereotypes and cultural superiority come in. we are stereotyped as having certain attitudes, certain habits. traditional ideas on female submissiveness and docility also play a part and how many bw these days don't fit that mold. lots of things. ironically, white women with the same personality traits that are stereotyped as being common in bw won't be judged as harshly. its just reality I guess in a world build on racism.0
I still believe that it is an issue of preference. This is because, I am 100% asian yet not the least interested in them physically (they can win me through their personality though) Their physical appearance is not so applealing for me.2
Honestly, there are a lot of people out there who are racist. And yes, I've noticed a lot of black guys like white chicks. Whatever. I've seen in my time as well a few men (white) who like all sorts of non-white girls. People are usually more confortable dating within their race though. There are many types of people out there. And the concept the black women are ugly, I've seen so many black stunners... oh well. I'm from Canada, if you're from the States things may be different, but that's my POV.0
Maybe just the circle of people you are reading about don't have any African American desire. I'm sure there is plenty of forums out there dedicated to how African American women are the the most beautiful. And plus it is the media ... what good does that really ever do?Everyone has different preference or attractions, it might not be just because of skin color in a lot of cases too. Many people have interracial struggles and biases as well... there are many reasons.0
i disagree with what you're trying to do, you cannot look to the internet to get the answers for that, some people are going to be even more cruel and blow your self esteem further, you ever wondered why Oprah and other famous people don't reply to critics, because it is not important. You need to visit sitesthat build self esteem, it seem you are looking in all the wrong places. No one has the authority to speak on which race is rough or cute gimme a break, some whites, Chinese , blacks all have their nice looking and ugly people. WHO CARES! a sad group of people will like you to care but you are wasting your time. YOU ARE WHAT EVER YOU FEEL! LOOK AT OPRAH, HALLE BERRY they don't give a sh*t they just live the life they were given!3
THE FOLLOWING IS A RESPONSE TO ANONYMOUS’S RESPONSE TO MY FIRST POST:
We’ve been targeted since we were brought over here to be enslaved. People try to eliminate what they fear which is why they do everything in their power to eliminate us. Our history contains people who have fought against injustice and those in charge don’t like that. They hate us because historically, we’re a strong people and they know that we have the power to defeat injustice if we stuck together. Because of this knowledge many vices were introduced to our communities that we now use to eliminate ourselves. You see, they are just sitting back and laughing at us (figuratively speaking) while we parade around like buffoons, using the tools that they gave us to annihilate our race. They give us the labels as uneducated, promiscuous, lazy, nappy head, etc to make everyone including us believe that we are of lesser quality than our white counterparts. So when someone fits the stereotype, they are put under the spotlight. So a pregnant black girl is viewed as a loose sex-feign because of the jezebel stereotype; whereas, a pregnant Hispanic girl may not be focused on as much. Everyone is conditioned to hate us directly and indirectly. No one understands what black people face in this society which is why many of them get frustrated when the question of race arises. We live in a land built by us but a society that was constructed to defeat us and those benefitting from it expect us to “let it go” like the problem has been solved. Regardless of what people say, we are not given the same opportunities and those that we do have, we had to jump through 400 hoops to obtain. It is true that Maury’s show needs to be discontinued but making a mockery out of minorities is what makes the money so it will continue to be shown. Modern day minstrel shows which should also be removed from television is anything related to Flavor Flav, New York aka Janice the Muppet, For the Love of Ray J (even though that’s my god brother, I hate that show), the Cleveland Show, Rap videos that glamorize the ghetto and “the splash life” and the list goes on. The truth is, as long as black people continue this fight against each other and the desperate struggle to fit in with mainstream society by allowing themselves to be molded into what Anglo America wants them to be, we will continue to be pimped by this society. We should be able to be who we are and not let anyone else make us feel ashamed of it. We should be able to speak how we want, dress how we want, and act how we want etc because if I’m not mistaken, society is not whose judgment that matters. People need to learn to accept each other for who they are and not for what one thinks one should be.
We are told what is and what is not beautiful. The media is sending out subliminal messages to the black community that we are ugly and less of a person than someone of European descent. Black women are portrayed as gold0diggers, jezebels and any other negative thing that you can think of. Black people in general are portrayed as uneducated, "ghetto" behaving hoodlums who speak slang and Ebonics. Look at Maury and his baby daddy-shows, any judge show, the news ,etc. These images, among other things, cause many of us to internalize these beliefs, in turn creating the deep rooted self-hate that is currently present in our community.I could go on forever, literally, but I'll stop here because I can feel myself getting out of control.3
I think there is a book by Toni Morrison about this... Something like the Bluest Eye is the name of it. I haven't read it and I'm hoping to definitely this summer.2
Men are Taught what is attractive. The media does not portray black women in a positive light, and has never done so.3
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I am a girl, so I don't know why men don't seem to like black women, but I would like to tell a story about something that happened in high school to me. I was raised to judge each individual individually to decide whether or not they were a worthwhile person. I was raised that there is no difference between people with different color skin, we just have different color skin, that's all. I was also raised to have no clue that there was any difference between religions. Different people believe different things is what my mom used to tell me, and that whatever works for you is what you should believe.
One day in school when I was a junior, we were doing some kind of election for something. There were 4 girls up for election. Two white girls, a mexican girl, and a black girl. The black girl just happened to be one of the sweetest friendliest people ever, and was pretty much liked by every single person in the school, so we all knew she was going to win. Everyone had been asking everyone who they voted for all day long...yeah yeah yeah, we weren't supposed to and blah blah blah, but we did anyway. I had asked all my friends already, and we had all voted for Sharifa. EVERYONE I asked had voted for her. So I asked the girl who sat in front of me in math class who she voted for, and when she said Sharifa, I smiled and said "that's what I thought". I was about to add that there was pretty much no way she was going to lose because we all like her so much when this girl stood up and screamed at me for being a rascist bitch, and challenged me to fight right there in the classroom. I had no freakin clue what she was talking about until she screamed at me some more about "that's what you thought huh? that's what you thought because I'm black I'm gonna vote for the black girl?" That wasn't what I meant at all...Sharifa was my friend. I thought she would vote for her because we all did, not because she was black. It actually still hurts my feelings when I think about how angry she got and what she thought I meant. Unfortunately, that is the type of thing that is shown about black women in the media. Black women always get portrayed as "strong" and "powerful" they are never "sweet" or "the girl next door". The media promotes this view of strong powerful black women and I think lots of men get that confused with cold and dominating. Men are intimidated by women that could kick their ass, and that is how black women in the media are portrayed. I don't know why that is, but that is what I have seen. I myself am white, and am not particularly attracted to white men at all. I prefer Asian men...I don't know why but to me, they are more handsome than other men. I don't know if that answers anything you asked, but I think so.0
The posts you're seeing online about black women being unattractive are from people with extreme views who feel strongly enough about the matter to broadcast their opinions. The people who don't feel as strongly won't feel the need to post such things, which means you're rarely ever getting their side of the argument.
Plus, there are a lot of negative stereotypes about black women. I've heard plenty of people (including black women) say that black women have attitudes, and white women are more submissive--that's an insult to women of both races. The media doesn't do much to stop the stereotypes either.
But I'm white, and I live in a predominantly black area. I know plenty of really attractive black girls, and plenty who are in relationships. When I was in high school, the white kids mostly dated people from outside of school or each other since no one else really showed interest. In cases like that and the one you described at your school, I think it's a matter of being in the minority, and the minority just happens to be a particular race.1
I'm a black female and I live in a really multi culturual city still I mainly date white guys not sure why I'm just more attracted to them. When I meet guys they usually are like I've never been with a black girl before. I find it less common now that I'm older. The ratio of good looking black girls or athelic in size is few and far between where I come from. I think that if you are a black and female you have to keep up with being thin and being pretty. that's just how I see things here.0
There are attractive black woman and unattractive white women. I think black women get a lot of BS put on them from the way media portrays African American women. Like look and Beyonce and Tyra Banks. Yes both are beautiful black women but both have very white features and work very hard to obtain that type of look. Then you have a beautiful black woman like Alex Wek ( a runway model) who is straight out of Africa and one of the most strikingly beautiful women I have ever seen IMO. I think the media takes so many beautiful black women and tries to fit them into a white mold. Therefore other black women that don't look white enough question their beauty because of it. I have many black friends that are drop-dead gorgeous and a lot of them don't realize it because they feel like they don't fit societies standards. I even have a half and half friend that people do double takes at and she still straightens her beautiful curly hair and wears blue contacts to cover her honey colored eyes. I just don't get it. The world is just messed up today. I love people who look unique and different. I think women just have it bad no matter what with all the pressure put on us. Black women have it even worse because of stereotypes place on them and the pressure to look white. Again though, black woman are just as beautiful as white woman, as are Hispanics and every race in between. Everyone race has beautiful and unique features and needs to embrace them not matter what pressures society puts on them.8
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The world has become an awful sh*t show in some aspects and you shouldn't let it get to you...trust me. I'm african and I have heard it all. Dark skin just has a baddd rap. Media and overall ignorance is to blame.I think it's awful to watch shows( that project a very stereotypical black character)and then base your opinions of AAs off of that. Just like it's ignorant to live in a small town and say,"The couple of black people I came across had attitudes and now I'm just not attracted to black girls. Personalities are based on so many factors..environment,life experiences etc..and that goes for everyone of every race. Then you have those who talk about the way we LOOK. They don't like our boobs,butts,noses,skin color etc. Fine.Thats your preference. But the irony is
natural dark skin gets a thumbs down,meanwhile folks are roasting in the sun to become DARKER. Only to know that their skin is going to become permanently damaged as they age but who cares eh? Folks are flocking to the doc to get collagen injections to make their lip larger! Would ya look at that?! Butt implants,Boob implants etc. Things that a lot of dark women naturally have,others covet and they buy it. But because of our dark skin,we aren't necessarily acknowledged for a lot of positive attributes..physically or otherwise. Enough with the superficial physical aspect,i just had to address it. Racism/prejudice is unfortunately buried deep into the Americas soil. Dark skin has always been thought of as the "lesser". But other parts of the world is different...more receptive even. It's unfortunate that some folks are using this forum to express their racism and predjudices,but at least they are being honest. I say,learn to love every inch of you! You are Gods creation so you are beautiful.5
I don't think they're the least desirable.
There are pretty ones and there are less pretty ones,
and it's the same with every race.0
I am a white female and I think that a lot of black women are absolutely gorgeous... the thing is why they don't have a long married relationship is because black women are very strong a very independent they won't stay around and put up with any bodys shit... ya know... And I mean that as the highest compliment... that is an excellent thing... very excellent thing... I would be building my self esteem on that you are a very strong beautiful black woman and you know what you want and you won't settle for less or let someone take advantage of you on the way to getting what you want. Black women are the mentally and emotionally strongest women I know and I envy them for that! You should feel very blessed... the right man will come along I promise some man down the road will worship you for your values and your bluntness and independentness...2
The anonymous under 18 female is very accurate.
Studies have shown we go for people that look like us, e.g. I myself as a dark haired white dominant facial features female go for males who fit the same type. Its not deliberate, I just do. Though I do sometimes go for darker men too, I find some Turkish, Persian and Arab men physically attractive but cultural differences put me off.
Best way to assess this is thinking about people born in your country. I think I'd date British Indians no questions asked, British Carribeans and Jamaicans again, I like their features and skin colour is not what puts me off. I once got with a pretty dark Indian guy cos he was south Indian. I go for features like mine though, so yeah, a straight, dominant nose is part of what I like. But I reject as many Celtic looking white men for that as I would non whites.
Now to answer why others find black girls unattractive... I will be honest and repeat discussions I have had with friends:
Man 1: (white british, 24) He adores Zambians and African women in general. He just thinks they posess a natural beauty, striking big eyes and full smiles that white, asian or Indian women cannot compete with.
Man 2: (white british, 25) Says northern Africans are the most beautiful. He has never got with a black woman though and generally prefers white women, he finds them "safer" and less likely to have other issues.
Man 3: (academic indian living in europe, 31) Says Indian women are the most beautiful, he goes completely for the face and thinks Indian women represent the artistic ideal. He has also got with white women too when he likes their faces. He doesn't like black women and he has no real explanation for it, they just fail to turn him on. He also doesn't like oriental/asian women because he says they look androgenous and have small breasts and bums.
Man 4: (white german, 30) Has only got with white women, he is not opposed, its just never happened any other way.
Various other men from various places have said that they would only get with their own race plus white. I think the anon answer is correct, it is just because the white woman has become idealised because of the white dominated media and porn industry. Also in many cultures, pale is seen as better, so whites automatically escape any colour prejudice. Also yeah there is this kinky dominance thing. In Germany I saw some ok looking Turkish boys with hideous German girlfriends - its just a status thing. I find it weird, the assumption we are better I am assuming cos they think we are richer and higher in status, when in actual fact a lot of the girls these guys pick are lower than themselves.
I'm no white supremecist or nationalist, but I say stick to your own nation, culture, class and religion wherever possible. I lived in Germany for two years, and there are a lot of guys out there just wanting to tick a box on their world map. Don't be someone's novelty, be with an equal.
If there are nice black guys, date them.3
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