Girls: How can I convince a stubborn girl?

[TravisStowell]

It seems no matter how hard I've tried or how many times I've talked to her, things never change!

I've known her for almost a year now and we are deeply in love, and I know all girls tell their men that they are fat so they will tell her that she is skinny and boosts her self esteem; but this time it's different.

I try so hard to be sweet and tell her how much she means to me and that I know her body is attractive, using words like "sexy, beautiful, and gorgeous" but she won't listen to me.

She tries to use examples of how many people are so much better than her and that she isn't good enough for me. She thinks I want more than her and that I would love her more if she threw up to get skinny. (no she doesn't throw up, I stopped that)

It seems no matter how hard I try, I can't get her to see what I see! She really is the most beautiful girl I've seen and I love everything about her, but she won't believe me.

I want her to be happy and be proud of who she is and of her body.

What is going on through her head?

[poppintropica]

It's a paradox. You shouldn't feel bad, because you genuinely can't do anything about it. This is how a girl's mind works. We are brought up believing that beauty is of great importance. When you don't meet the requirements, society brings you down. All you can do is keep supporting her like you have been. Make sure she knows she's perfect, remind her everyday. Tell her you love her no matter what she looks like, now and forever. Keep reassuring her that she is so special, because she is obviously a lucky girl to have you. By the sounds of this, she is a beautiful girl, and if some random over the internet can see this, why can't she? The time will come when she is proud of herself. You just need to help her through the difficult times of self-hate, every girl has them, some just cope better than others.

[TravisStowell]

Thank you tons! You've really helped me alot!

I helped a little by telling her a romantic story of her and I :)

And telling her how much I care :)

[poppintropica]

Aww, I'm glad that I'm helpful :)

[Anonymous]

What some women don't realize, too, is that they're all built differently. Tell her that you love every part of her, and I don't know if you two do anything like this or not, but if you do, run your hands down her body as you say it and give her a long passionate kiss after you do. And if she tries to argue, just politely kiss her to shut her up, and keep kissing her until she does!

Be passionate about her, that usually does quite a bit of convincing after awhile.

I hope things work out!

[TravisStowell]

Thankyou! I'll definitely keep this in mind

[junebugj]

I would jsut keep up with that and telll her you never want anyone elss only her show her how much she means to you. But if that doesn't work she may need to seek consuling. And I admire you for being this way your restoring my faith in the male gender I wish there were more men like you :-)

[TravisStowell]

Awe! Thanks for that!

I appreciate your help!

[Anonymous]

All women are beautiful! All you can do is be there for her through her dark hours. I have gone through major self hate, just like every other woman. Keep fashion magazines away from her because those women aren't real, they are all photo shopped, and most are anorexic. She will gain self confidence over time and realize the great beauty that she holds. Good luck to both of you! xxx

[TravisStowell]

Thankyou :)

[enipeso]

The next time she says something bad about herself look her straight in the eye and with the most serious face you can make say "Don't talk about the woman I love like that!"

This takes off the presser of being seen as "seeking reinsurance" by talking about her honest insecurities but it also lets her know that you love her and what she says about herself hurts you. We too often forget that when we are in a committed relationship we internalizes the actions and appearance of the person we love. When they make a silly mistake or someone discs them it is as if we are the ones being attacked. So when the person attacks themselves they may not realizes they are attacking their loved one. You need to let her know that she is hurting you. When she fails to see her beauty it is like she is saying you failed to show it to her. And that is what is bothering you.

[Anonymous]

she might not like something about herself she might not like her but, breast size or even her abs

she see others that has things that she might not you know

and plus those people are just complainers only want attention and people telling them they are beautiful and wants to hear it

[TravisStowell]

Crap I meant to push the down arrow...

You call my girl a COMPLAINER?!?!

she doesn't complain! She just gets insecure!